Microaggressions

One day my boss comes up to me and out of the blue says

My boss: “”[last name] , hey [last name] is that your husband’s name?
Me: No I didn’t take my husband’s last name.
Boss: …
Me: I’m a feminist, that’s why
Boss: I could not stand it if my wife thought she could keep her own name. She has my name. We are going to have to work on this, you will take your husband’s name by the end of the year.




February 1st, 2013 | Comments (3)

3 Responses to “”

  1. Shio:

    Yeah, I would resign.
    Or just say:
    ‘Mind your own beeswax.’
    You’ve got to stand up to these people who think they have the right to interfere in your life choices. Just because he’s your boss doesn’t mean you have to follow his every whim.

    I would have just said,
    ‘Excuse me?’
    Loudly, and asked him to repeat it so everyone could hear, then have him justify it. I understand if you don’t lose your job but you have to make it clear somehow you won’t tolerate that bullshit.

  2. Donny D.:

    I keep wanting to write a post asking where this happened, ’cause this sounds like the mentality of a very conservative, traditional place, but I’m apprehensive the OP will show up and say it happened someplace most consider liberal or progressive.

    There is a culture war vibe here. As though the boss wasn’t an innocent traditional guy who was genuinely surprised that any married woman (that he’d be likely to talk) to wouldn’t take her husbands surname.

  3. Brittany:

    Whoa, talk about overstepping his boundaries.

    I think the correct response here would be “Is that something you think our human relations department would be interested in hearing?” as a way to politely say that you’re not going to stand for this, and you intend to bring the company in if your boss tries to pressure you to do something that you don’t want to.

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