editor — Wed, 02 May 2012 20:17:18 +0000

My male dog is wearing a ribbon tied in a bow around his neck. When my grandfather sees him he exclaims loudly, “Jake! You’re a poofter! It’s not enough that you’ve had your balls cut off. Now you’re a poofter as well!” Then asks me incredulously why he’s wearing a bow.

editor — Wed, 02 May 2012 20:12:32 +0000

Me: Hey, should I go to a steakhouse or to a sushi place for dinner with my family?
Friend: I think you should go to the steakhouse because you guys know how to make sushi, right?

editor — Wed, 02 May 2012 20:06:47 +0000

Professor: Where did you go to school to write like this?

Me: In New Jersey.

Professor: No, was it a private school?

Me: No, is something wrong?

Professor: Well you say “ask” versus “ax” and your writing is impeccable.

Me: Okaaaaayyyyyyyy.

editor — Wed, 02 May 2012 19:53:13 +0000

I noticed that when I eat out and order a Coke, I’m often asked whether I want it to be a diet Coke. I asked some male friends about this and they told me it never happens to them.

editor — Sat, 21 Apr 2012 22:56:39 +0000

“You shouldn’t come to the construction site. You’re a distraction and it’s hard for us to get work done. It’s not your fault so don’t take it personally, but that’s just the way men are. Why don’t you stay in the office and I’ll check on you later?”

davidzhou — Sat, 21 Apr 2012 22:52:24 +0000

Sweden’s culture minister commissions a cake of an African woman, supposedly representing female circumcision.

editor — Sat, 31 Mar 2012 23:33:03 +0000

“Well, so what that I forgot it? It’s not something that a man thinks about. That’s not the kind of thing a man is worried about.” My partner said this to me when he forgot to bring home a pregnancy test from the store.

editor — Sat, 31 Mar 2012 23:27:59 +0000

“When are you going to have some kids? You know you’re not getting any younger.” This is what a co-worker said to me after learning that someone we both know is expecting a child. What if I can’t have children? What if I don’t want children? Why don’t people think about that before speaking?

editor — Fri, 23 Mar 2012 22:16:59 +0000

“You used to have such a dyke haircut,” someone says to me all the time. 1. Why the implication that “dyke haircuts” – and therefore lesbians – are unfeminine and unattractive? 2. Why does this person get away with telling me I’m unattractive? What if I am attracted to women?

editor — Fri, 23 Mar 2012 22:15:10 +0000

Our principal tells us via intercom system some basic announcements. Proceeds with a few innocent reminders about school policy on dress code. Then – “And ladies, please make sure you’re not showing too much cleavage. We don’t want our male students getting distracted!” Excuse me?