Posts by Date
- March 2, 2010
My boss asks me why I’m studying humanities in college, since most Asians are good at math....
- March 2, 2010
Hiking with three Asian American friends (two Chinese, one hapa). We meet a white man boating down the Potomac. After chatting for a little while, he tells us that our culture is impressive and tries ...
- March 2, 2010
In a usually supportive women of color space, everyone’s discussion of ‘men of color’ clearly does not include Asian American men....
- March 2, 2010
Hired by an Upper West Side daycare for a lion dance performance for their Purim party. While being hired, we are asked via email if show incorporates “idol worship” and “false gods....
- March 2, 2010
Walk into the movie Tropic Thunder with the family, not expecting blackface or time-old Asian stereotypes....
- March 2, 2010
On the subway with 2 Asian American friends, I am harassed by a very drunk, very physically large man who made ching-chong kung fu noises with intense motions for ten minutes while everyone in the sub...
- March 2, 2010
11th grade classmate asks friend, “If you could get really rich and powerful by killing some random person you don’t know or meet from a third world country at the touch of a button, witho...
- March 2, 2010
No, you’re really not that race though.
...
- March 2, 2010
Inexplicably placed in ESL for weeks with white teacher from Sweden who speaks worse English than I do....
- March 2, 2010
(At a playground clapping game) “I went to a Chinese restaurant to buy a loaf of bread bread bread they wrapped it up in toilet paper and this is what they said said said my name is eli eli chic...
- March 2, 2010
Campaign flyer for a college student council party...
- March 1, 2010
That’s what she said.
...
- March 1, 2010
Roommates seek my approval for whether the stir-fry they make and the ramen they buy are authentic enough....
- March 1, 2010
I text a male friend to ask if he wants to see Sex and the City: The Movie in three days at an outdoor summer screening. He texts me back, “Ya. Should i invert my penis as well?” After rec...
- March 1, 2010
Swing dancing during orientation week of college. Told by white man I am swing dancing with that he was recently in Thailand and “your women are very beautiful.”...
- March 1, 2010
Made to hold the Chinese flag for grade school track-and-field tournament....
- March 1, 2010
Calm down.
...
- March 1, 2010
An Asian American girl I am dating tells me, “You’re not like other Asian men I know.”...
- November 30, 2010
Can I speak to your manager or someone above you?
...
- November 30, 2010
When I start elementary school, I am automatically placed in ESL classes with all the other 2nd-gen Asian kids. My parents have to visit the school multiple times to get me out saying, “You don&...
- November 30, 2010
Hey, if you don’t like it when they use ‘gay’ like that, then don’t pay attention to them. Don’t let yourself get so worked up about it.
...
- November 30, 2010
An older man who I am hoping is a veteran feels the need to tell me, “I killed many of your people, but I have no ill feelings towards the Vietnamese.” I’m Filipino....
- November 30, 2010
In math class, I proudly declare that I want to be a veterinarian when I grow up. A boy sitting near me turns around and says, “You aren’t smart enough to be a veterinarian.”
age: el...
- November 30, 2010
Wait, so how do you have sex if neither of you has a penis?
...
- November 30, 2010
You know, it’s so amazing. I was just looking at your hands and feet- they’re so dark on the top, but then at the palms they look just like ours! Hahaha.
My gymnastics coach in front of ...
- November 30, 2010
When I was on the subway one night going home, there was this dude sitting down with some take out containers, about to eat them. Another guy with a cowboy hat was standing and said, “Is that short ...
- November 30, 2010
Why are you dressed like that?
A high school teacher, who was telling me that I looked gay today....
- November 30, 2010
You’re so whitewashed.
when: continuously...
- November 30, 2010
A Korean American woman I met is complaining about the pervasiveness of patriarchy in Korean society. A Korean American male friend of mine tells her, “Well, you will always have a way of explai...
- November 30, 2010
“Hey, do you know this song and/or dance?!” Just because I’m black doesn’t mean I know every song, rap lyric, or dance that was created by black people.
when: most recently, l...
- November 30, 2010
Glancing up from his record stand, a male street vendor says, “I’m going to cum on your face tonight.” I turn my head away and pick up my pace....
- November 30, 2010
Duane Reade, NYC...
- November 30, 2010
You look exotic. What are you?
when: since I started going out to bars...
- November 30, 2010
Made to take a yearly English as a Second Language test in elementary school to check that I haven’t forgotten English during the year....
- November 30, 2010
To prove in class that abused children react when adults raise their hands, my third grade teacher suddenly feigns a backhand at me. I cringe, reflexively....
- November 30, 2010
Sorry, I only like masculine men.
A gay guy...
- November 30, 2010
Impasse, Director: Brad Schouw ...
- November 30, 2010
White person tells his date, “Babe, you need to stop worrying about race so much.”...
- November 30, 2010
A white student challenges a white professor’s comment. The professor responds: “White privilege!? YOU’RE white. Ever think about that?!”...
- November 30, 2010
I’ve always wanted a gay best friend.
...
- November 30, 2010
Gay guy is sitting with a girl in bar and leaves to get themselves another round. Another guy sits down with the girl and asks, “So, is that a guy or a girl you’re with?”...
- November 30, 2010
So there we were, spending Thanksgiving with an actual Native American - how fun is that!
...
- November 30, 2010
A party co-hosted by an Asian fraternity and Latino fraternity tells the potential party-goer: “We expect to see cultural phenomena such as ‘Asian Glow’ and ‘Latino Flow.’...
- November 30, 2010
Hey, do you want to be my geisha?
A guy standing next to me at the intersection as we wait for the “walk” signal...
- November 30, 2010
Ladies first.
...
- November 17, 2010
reverse racism
...
- December 31, 2010
Do you know where I should lock my bike? I don’t want it to get stolen, ‘cuz I know there are a lot of black kids here.
...
- December 31, 2010
Cute.
Today, a man on the street swerved out of his way to whisper this quietly in my ear as we passed each other....
- December 31, 2010
Oh, are you gay?
My Japanese professor to a man who wasn’t listening and accidentally raised his hand when the professor told all the women to raise their hands. At my campus years ago, by a ...
- December 31, 2010
You know, get a bag, get a dog, get a gay man. Everyone knows they’re the ultimate accessory. I swear if I had one I’d dress better.
30 year old woman, coworker of my department at the m...
- December 31, 2010
That’s just the black in him coming out.
My white mother talking about my black father, after I complained he is frequently late. They divorced when I was little....
- December 30, 2010
I think that black people should have their civil rights taken away if gay people can’t marry.
From white male, gay ‘friend’ about Prop 8. I’ve known him for over 20 years. ...
- December 30, 2010
If you can ‘pinch an inch’ it means you’re probably fat.
Science teacher was the first man to ever make me feel badly about my body. age: 14, when: in middle school in 1998. ...
- December 30, 2010
I’m brought to a friend of my parent’s home for the first time. They have a boy who is my same age and there are video games and board games in the play room. The mother says she’s s...
- December 30, 2010
Racism is a sign of weakness in the person that is offended.
A friend’s reaction when I said I regretted making a racist remark that offended a friend of mine last year. I felt shocked....
- December 30, 2010
Jesus, you can quit making us feel guilty about the fact that you’re poor.
From a good friend after I offhandedly mentioned not being able to afford new boots. I go to an extremely expensive ...
- December 29, 2010
Why can’t they all just speak English? Or at least use that pinyin stuff. The characters are so confusing!
Guy in my Mandarin Chinese class. Anything to make it easier for the white people, appare...
- December 29, 2010
You’re not a guy so you don’t get it. A straight male rooming with a gay male will ALWAYS be afraid that the gay male is coming on to him. No exceptions.
In response to suicide at Rutger...
- December 29, 2010
I really don’t understand why you are so invested in women’s rights and fighting sexism and stuff - these things clearly don’t affect you.
A male friend about my job as an editor a...
- December 29, 2010
My mom tells me that she feels guilty about never teaching me how to speak Vietnamese growing up, but felt like she had to or else I wouldn’t have done as well in school. And people always ask...
- December 29, 2010
Isn’t AIDS just like a black and gay problem?
Member of my Master’s program...
- December 29, 2010
You’re very pretty.
Drunk 40-year-old man to me, a 20-year-old, at midnight while just the two of us wait for the bus...
- December 28, 2010
I’m sick of wealthy people having to pay for all these services POOR PEOPLE DON’T EVEN DESERVE.
My mom...
- December 28, 2010
Why can’t you just be white?
My partner at the time said this to me when I was trying to communicate about my identity struggles as a multigenerational mixed race person.
Made me feel: Erased...
- December 28, 2010
Well, what are you going to do when you graduate and get a job and want to be PROFESSIONAL?
President of my sorority (a Russian-American with long, blonde hair) while looking at MY AFRO in our group...
- December 28, 2010
YOU’RE LETTING DOWN PEOPLE OF COLOR.
A campus activist to me, a person of color...
- December 28, 2010
But you’re too YOUNG to have arthritis!
Stranger at restaurant, to me, after seeing my hand braces and asking why I had them....
- December 27, 2010
While playing online poker, my white husband’s online partner was represented by a black, male avatar. His mother walked by and said, “Couldn’t you get someone smart to be your part...
- December 27, 2010
THAT’S SO GAY
Every single day in schools throughout the US & at the university where I work. Makes me feel tired....
- December 27, 2010
SMILE!
from complete male strangers on the street....
- December 27, 2010
If u can’t speak english… u shouldn’t be able to get a license…. just sayin
Facebook status by one of my friends, and “liked” by several others so far....
- December 27, 2010
I live in Manhattan. I’m a black man. I told a colleague where I lived when I was overseas, and the response was, sigh, “Ah, Harlem.”...
- December 27, 2010
Roommate is skyping with her friend from home and she mentions my name.He says, “Which one is she, the one with *pulls eyelids back*?”...
- December 26, 2010
Constantly having men yell “KONNICHIWA” or “NI HAO” to me when I walk down the street. I am neither Japanese nor Chinese and EVEN IF I WAS IT WOULD STILL BE OFFENSIVE....
- December 26, 2010
When I was 14 I wanted to get my hair cut short and have it go to wigs for people going through chemotherapy. My mom said it was okay but she didn’t want me to look like a “dyke”. Sh...
- December 26, 2010
When did your father leave home? I think you have problems with male authority because your father isn’t around.
My boss, concerning my (dead) father...
- December 26, 2010
What are you, anyway? You have a nice Canadian accent, but you never know.
When I worked in a call centre....
- December 26, 2010
You get so over-emotional about sexual harassment.
A male friend to me, in a crowded bar....
- December 25, 2010
Can I tell them??!! She’s a lesbian too!
my friend while introducing me to a queer female couple at a party...
- December 25, 2010
YOU CAN’T BE BISEXUAL, THERE’S NO SUCH THING. YOU’RE EITHER STRAIGHT OR GAY. BI GIRLS ARE JUST TRYING TO GET ATTENTION
my ex-girlfriend...
- December 25, 2010
You’re one of the GOOD Mexicans!
...
- December 24, 2010
You know, Obama may have black skin, but he was basically raised white.
A manager at my company, discussing President Obama with several of my coworkers....
- December 24, 2010
I thought you were shallow and silly cuz you’re always dancing and smiling, but when you spoke up at the open mic I realized you have meaningful things to say.
white cis hetero guy after I cal...
- December 24, 2010
All girls who wear tights are just asking to be raped.
My boyfriend, trying to give me a compliment...
- December 24, 2010
Dear readers,
From the very beginning, we’ve wanted a space where we can educate each other about the subtle ways in which power and privilege are enacted in our lives. That’s why weR...
- December 24, 2010
You speak Spanish? No way, you’re white.
to a latino male...
- December 23, 2010
Can you, like, give an example of sexism? I need you to prove it exists.
exact words of a male friend...
- December 23, 2010
You’ll be fine! Just talk like a white person.
A white job-training counselor speaking to a young man of color about his upcoming job interview....
- December 23, 2010
Straight guy: That’s really gay. And no, I don’t mean gay as in homosexual, I mean gay as in stupid, you know? I’m a tolerant person, but that’s just gay....
- December 23, 2010
So it says here that you’re disabled due to having bipolar disorder. Well, pardon me for saying this, but aren’t the medications better than they used to be? Lots of people can work now.
...
- December 22, 2010
Wow, you’re deaf, but your English is good.
...
- December 22, 2010
Shouldn’t you be able to get it up for a girl because of an evolutionary instinct to procreate?
...
- December 22, 2010
Male medical student to another: “I didn’t see you paying too much attention during this lecture. What are you gay?” Overheard after anatomy lecture on female genitalia....
- December 22, 2010
A white coworker was talking to me about how it hurt her that her family didn’t accept her black boyfriend. She said, pointing to the lampshade on her desk, “It’s not even like he...
- December 21, 2010
The white interns complained that they were feeling left out.
Response given by white training director in health care setting when I (person of color) asked why the supervision group for students o...
- December 21, 2010
Black girls don’t like football. You’re only watching to get guys.
35 year old man, watching the same football game as I was in a sports bar....
- December 21, 2010
Pretty much any time I leave the house in my wheelchair and go to a public place, people feel entitled to come up and ask me the most intrusive personal questions. On a weekly basis, someone asks me: ...
- December 21, 2010
The toy aisle at a drugstore in Moscow, Idaho. There is an actual barrier between the ‘girl’ toys and ‘boy’ toys, almost as if to make s...
- December 21, 2010
And who is this lovely exotic young lady over here?
old white woman at a dinner party...
- December 21, 2010
It just needs a good fingering.
Drunk man harassing me on way home (because I’m butch/visibly queer)...
- December 21, 2010
Other children explained to me at the age of six, shortly after moving to North Carolina in 1977, that because of the Tower of Babel, a mixed-race child like myself is an evil abomination against God ...
- December 21, 2010
A political campaigner approaches two male friends and me. He speaks only to them even when I interject....
- December 21, 2010
A political campaigner approaches two male friends and me. He speaks only to them even when I interject....
- December 20, 2010
Reading a newspaper article with a photo of three class-topping recent high school graduates: a white boy and a white girl from privileged schools and an Aboriginal girl from a public school. The wh...
- December 20, 2010
I just saw a DUDE in a miniskirt and fishnets! Man I hope he doesn’t bend over in front of me!
College student out on a cigarette break. Made me feel frustrated!...
- December 20, 2010
I sought treatment for depression during my junior year at an Ivy League school. My off-campus therapist suggested that I transfer to a community college because he had a hard time “imagining me...
- December 20, 2010
Pay close attention to this girls, because one day, you’ll be cooking all the food for your husbands and children and will be responsible for their nutrition!
A male Career and Life Management...
- December 20, 2010
According to a user,
I think your layout header thing is blocking the follow button. i had to do a lot of maneuvering to follow you!
… and another,
Hi, I had the same problem trying to find t...
- December 20, 2010
In response to concerns about the everyday racism symptomatic of white privilege in my department, and academic colleague replied to me: It is not your responsibility as a woman of color to educate w...
- December 20, 2010
Me: As a kid, I got asked a lot if I was a boy or a girl.Friend: Oh, how mean! But you weren’t that ugly as a kid!
I really can’t make the connection between gender-dubious and unattractiv...
- December 20, 2010
During my freshman year of high school, the administrators pulled all of the Asian kids out of class and made us take an English proficiency test. At first we thought it was a joke, but sitting at t...
- December 20, 2010
Me (Asian American, first generation, low income student): It’s not like I can just call my parents and ask to get a job from one of their friends.
Privileged white guy: Well, if you stopped com...
- December 19, 2010
A college professor takes away 10 points from my oral presentation because I am not “professionally dressed”. I am here with limited possessions from a state that is 3,000 miles away. I ...
- December 19, 2010
“Face it Diallo, blacks just aren’t good at math or science” - My guidance counselor in the 3rd grade
We were having a conversation on what I wanted to be when I grew up. She was ...
- December 19, 2010
Upperclass white hetero male: “I’m glad you’re just bi. Most real lesbians are ugly and mean.” When I call him out on it: “Oh shut up, you get my humor.”
Childhoo...
- December 19, 2010
Our club president wants us to be spirited for our first home basketball game, so she said we should all wear read “Indian paint”. I’m Native American and she didn’t even bothe...
- December 19, 2010
She can’t be racist… she DOES have a Mexican husband, you know.
White 20-something co-worker, telling me the reason she doesn’t believe our supervisor can be racist or act in racis...
- December 19, 2010
“You speak English so well,” said the helpful white boy at the science fair.
“It’s my fucking first language,” I wanted to say. (Except I was representing my institution ...
- December 18, 2010
My father to me: You need to lose weight. (I am an Asian female.)To my brothers: You need to gain weight and muscle....
- December 18, 2010
Constantly having men yell “Konnichiwa” or “Ni Hao” to me when I walk down the street. I am neither Japanese nor Chinese, and even if I was it would still be offensive. Happens...
- December 18, 2010
Why don’t you fax him a picture of yourself? I’m sure he’ll get that memo to you faster.
A male colleague, when I tell him his co-worker has not yet faxed me the memo I requested. ...
- December 18, 2010
She had a right to feel scared of you. How could a person not be scared of Arabs after 9/11?
A friend’s response to how my Girl Scouts troop leader blatantly alienated me after 9/11. It made ...
- December 18, 2010
I can’t find a boyfriend here. All Taiwanese men look like women!
White American female in a study abroad program in Taiwan to our teacher in class...
- December 18, 2010
A classmate is speaking to his parents on the phone in Korean. When he put down the phone, some white classmates immediately started mimicking Korean sounds and laughing at him....
- December 18, 2010
They can’t use that word whenever they want. It’s essential to who I am. The concept of ‘woman’ is a central part of my being.” [later] “WOMEN are who I have sex wi...
- December 17, 2010
After stating that I am bisexual, I am told “yeah, all girls are.” I say that I would have probably noticed, having a rather vested interest in the matter. The response: “But my ...
- December 17, 2010
I want to steal a black baby. Black babies are just so much cuter than white babies!
A white administrator at work, after a mother came in for a conference and brought her little daughter...
- December 17, 2010
At the end of our second (and last) date: “Did you feel uncomfortable when I held your hand because of your background? I have Asian friends, and I know how Chinese people don’t like physi...
- December 17, 2010
Black people can have black history month, but if white people tried to have white history month, everyone would freak out!
My boss...
- December 17, 2010
Submission on College Humor, captioned: “i only came here for a gallon of milk, but why not? I eventually need to get that hedge trimmed.”...
- December 17, 2010
I am holding a sign pointed towards traffic that says, “Honk if UR against Racism”. White guy makes a point of catching my eye and shakes his head vigorously, mouthing “nah, mate....
- December 16, 2010
Washington Redskins. It would be offensive, but there’s not enough Indians left for it to be offensive to.
...
- December 16, 2010
Is my car gonna be okay?
White visitors to my house in the city...
- December 16, 2010
While staying with a friend in London, his cousin drops by for dinner. We turn on a show that’s sort of a line-up of stand-up comedians. (So far, all white men.) A black woman walks on stage. Fr...
- December 16, 2010
This wouldn’t have happened if you’d sent her to a nice private Hebrew School instead of a public school. She’ll probably marry a black guy some day.
My aunt to my mother about me ...
- December 16, 2010
A co-worker dropped off several members of our project team after an offsite meeting. When she got to my African American father’s home in an upscale neighborhood, she took one look at his hou...
- December 16, 2010
You’re very good-looking/polite/intelligent, though.
Several reactions I’ve gotten after people learned I’m part African American, including the parents of an ex-boyfriend....
- December 16, 2010
A man I don’t know nods at my elbow crutch and says, “I’d kill myself if I became disabled. No, really, I would”....
- December 16, 2010
I’m sitting at the bar when a man comes over and buys me a drink. He says, “The bartender told me you used to be a dude, like, he saw on your license. I totally respect that - trannies are...
- December 16, 2010
Wouldn’t it make it so much easier if everyone celebrated Christmas?
My boss, complaining about company policy to have “holiday” activities instead of “Christmas” ones....
- December 16, 2010
Using emoticons doesn’t make what Anonymous said any less racist....
- December 13, 2010
I think we ought to treat your homosexuality before we treat your depression.
Psychotherapist’s office at age 19....
- December 13, 2010
I wish I had [your disability] so I could skip class and get extra time on tests!
All the time throughout high school and college....
- December 13, 2010
Are you shopping for yourself or for someone thin?
Shop assistant in a fairly large chain store in Australia....
- December 12, 2010
If Asian women could stop kissing ass to white men for a moment and get in touch with their Asian community, then maybe they’ll get acknowledged as something other than “honorary white wom...
- December 12, 2010
The day after a party I ran into the host and she said, “My husband absolutely loved you, he said you broke all the stereotypes!” This party was hosted by the department chair of a colle...
- December 12, 2010
You know, you’re a very beautiful young lady. I thought you were a guy at first! You should grow your hair long! It would look a lot better.
Man on the street, shortly after I came out as a t...
- December 12, 2010
You’re always talking about racism, but I just don’t see its impacts on you. You’re not thinking globally. There are 3.2 billion Chinese people in the world. You are actually the maj...
- December 11, 2010
You want to say ‘mi novia’. If you say ‘mi novio’ it sounds like you have a boyfriend.
My Spanish professor...
- December 11, 2010
When I argue about international affairs or critique US policy, it’s often met with a “you know, if you went back to Pakistan or wherever you’re from, you wouldn’t even have ...
- December 11, 2010
Excuse me, do you speak English?
Man at the bus stop. I am an Asian American woman. I was reading Jane Austen. In English....
- December 11, 2010
If you’re not into tits and ass, you’re a homo. End of story.
...
- December 10, 2010
Most of the white people around here have never met a black person like you. You know, educated, well-spoken, etc.
At Pride Community Center meeting, where I was being introduced to the group. Appar...
- December 10, 2010
Every single book or documentary presented to me that persistently refers to indigenous North American people in the past tense....
- December 10, 2010
Old Navy: “Now I can tell them apart.” ...
- December 10, 2010
Remember, you’re representing your race today.
Vice principal to a group of students 97% African American going on a field trip. Made me feel shocked....
- December 10, 2010
Heyyyyy little girl!
Every morning, current job, older male coworker to me....
- December 10, 2010
Yeah, you can always tell, though.
Several people, some of them gay or lesbian, to me, a trans person, often when I haven’t disclosed....
- December 9, 2010
I’m fine with gay people, I just don’t understand why gay guys have to be so flaming.
a guy at trivia night at my local bar....
- December 9, 2010
When I was a doctoral physics student, my advisor consistently asked me (the only woman in our group) to handle administrative tasks and run errands for him....
- December 9, 2010
But I wonder what kind of Islam he believes in, since he’s African American. Where is he even learning about Islam? Maybe he’s some kind of ‘black Muslim.’
White male TA in...
- December 9, 2010
In kindergarten, we did a Christmas play with stereotypical Santas from around the world. Being the only Asian, I was given the role of Japanese Santa, for which I had to borrow a taekwondo outfit f...
- December 9, 2010
I’m black, and my name consists of four words that could easily be common first names. So of course I’ve been told, by people who read my name before they met me, “Wow, I really wasn’t expe...
- December 9, 2010
My psychologist constantly refers to my girlfriend of over 2 years as my friend, despite being corrected....
- December 9, 2010
A+ this is really good for a Latina.
I was a student at UC Davis, and my first English teacher wrote this on my paper....
- December 9, 2010
Well, the difference between Canada and the US is that in the US we just killed them all, so we don’t have to deal with them anymore.
Acquaintance talking about the Vancouver Olympics and the ...
- December 8, 2010
Your son doesn’t look Asian at all. Isn’t that funny. Your blood must dilute easily. Well, at least he looks like your husband.
...
- December 8, 2010
Friend of a friend to me (the only black woman at the table) while having lunch: “You’re vegetarian? So that means you don’t even eat chicken?” The other people around the ta...
- December 8, 2010
Friend says black people who went to Ivy League schools “aren’t really black.”...
- December 8, 2010
Wow, you are really good at your job! You are great. When they hired you I was so angry because I assumed you were a token, but you are actually very good!
Coworker a few months into a new job...
- December 8, 2010
There’s no such thing as white male privilege. That’s something that was invented in the 60’s by liberal feminists.
...
- December 8, 2010
You can’t be Alice in Wonderland. You’re not white.
My ex-boyfriend to me at a Halloween party...
- December 8, 2010
The company vice president visited today. He had in depth conversations with every male employee, but did not even greet the female employees....
- December 7, 2010
Could you get me some water?
White woman I’ve never met to me, a black woman she’s never met, in a vegan soul food restaurant in Baltimore, where we are both eating with our respective p...
- December 7, 2010
My white, middle-aged boss will only date very young (19-24 years) Asian women, and “jokingly” asks me to get the phone numbers of any I come into contact with. Since I work for a small, m...
- December 7, 2010
Wow, you don’t sound Asian on the phone!
Job interview...
- December 7, 2010
Why don’t you use your own bathroom?
Male classmate to me as I enter the men’s room, about one year after I came out as trans....
- December 7, 2010
I’m just not into [your race here] girls/guys. Sorry.
...
- December 7, 2010
My mom said this neighborhood is going downhill so we might move. There are so many Indians and Black people here now. God, where are they coming from? This place is becoming like a slum.
Two high s...
- December 7, 2010
If you don’t like being reminded of sexism, just ignore it.
...
- December 7, 2010
Whenever I stand fairly motionless in a big store (usually off in iPod-land), someone will invariably come up to me and assume I’m an employee rather than a customer. They start asking where thi...
- December 7, 2010
Customer: Where do you keep the black people music?Me: What? Wh… black people music?Customer: Yes, the music by black people!Me: Is there an artist you’re looking for? We have music by...
- December 7, 2010
Ohmygawd, you’re totally not what people think of when they think of muslim women. you’re so… cool!
Friend...
- December 6, 2010
I think black people have more tattoos than white people, because I associate tattoos with gangs.
Graduate from Georgetown University....
- December 5, 2010
More often than not, when I’m at a straight bar with the girl I’m dating, guys stare whenever we hold hands and even cheer whenever we kiss or show affection.
The worst is when guys thin...
- December 5, 2010
What do you mean, you don’t celebrate Christmas? It’s for everyone!
...
- December 5, 2010
At a party, the white host called the only black guest a n***** and explained that it wasn’t offensive because he didn’t mean it as an insult....
- December 5, 2010
Older co-worker: How can you be the president of the PRIDE club, aren’t you straight?Me: I’m not.Older co-worker: Not the president?Me: I’m not straight.Older co-worker: No…....
- December 5, 2010
My hair is in microbraids and little old white women think it’s just fine to pet my hair while in line at the grocery store....
- December 5, 2010
You could face a lot of discrimination if you decide to do this.
My dad, trying to convince me not to be transgender...
- December 5, 2010
In high school, during an SAT prep class:
“You shouldn’t have a problem getting into Berkeley. You’re a minority.”
Said to me, a black/Korean girl, by a full Korean girl. Late...
- December 5, 2010
It’s not like that with lesbians though, you can pretty much tell them on sight.
My coworker, a first year college student...
- December 5, 2010
My husband says that the race issues I encounter don’t count because Asians don’t suffer discrimination. ...
- December 5, 2010
Big titties.
Leering man who followed me around Penn Station for 10 minutes after making this lewd remark. ...
- December 4, 2010
Several male doctors insisted my debilitating health problems were all in my head – before I learned that I have a very real and treatable autoimmune disease....
- December 4, 2010
Mom: What’s your husband’s social security number?Me: I don’t know. Why?Mom: We should do a background check to see if he’s an illegal immigrant.
My husband is Mexican-American...
- December 4, 2010
You must be the new Arabic teacher!
At least four times this year, though I’ve been working at the university since 2008. I TEACH ANTHROPOLOGY AND SPECIALIZE IN THE US, but I happen to be of...
- December 4, 2010
(ex)Friend: I’m such a bad liberal. I don’t have any brown friends.Me: Excuse me? Native American, right over here. (ex)Friend: You don’t count, ‘cause you don’t look Ind...
- December 4, 2010
We would put you back in our ribs if we could.
My male American History teacher to a female student ...
- December 4, 2010
How ‘bout a smile, sweetheart!
A random guy on the street who has just gotten in my face...
- December 4, 2010
A man I’ve worked with tells my friend I’m the best female writer he knows.
age: 46, this year...
- December 4, 2010
I CAN TOTALLY CALL THEM THAT BECAUSE THEY FIT EVERY STEREOTYPE.
Boyfriend’s stepmother while recounting a tale of meeting a gay man and his partner, after using several epithets....
- December 4, 2010
Sitting at a bar chatting with my friend, a guy walks up to us, bows, and says “Konichiwa.” When I say “Excuse me?”, he says it again, louder so we can understand him. We’...
- December 4, 2010
My aunt asks me if I have a boyfriend yet without considering I might want a girlfriend....
- December 4, 2010
YOU’RE SO ARTICULATE… AND BEAUTIFUL IN AN EXOTIC WAY, EVEN THOUGH YOU’RE DARK…
My boyfriend’s mom...
- December 4, 2010
MAYBE IF YOU STOPPED FOCUSING ON WHY YOU THINK IT’S HARDER BEING A WOMAN, YOU COULD JUST FOCUS ON BEING SUCCESSFUL
My dad...
- December 3, 2010
WOW, YOU’RE REALLY RACE ANGRY, AREN’T YOU?
where: at work...
- December 3, 2010
[…]something like the feeling of “over-kill.” The tone could not sustain my patience, and turned a bit pedantic, whiney, and self-important[…]
an older, wealthy, liberal whi...
- December 3, 2010
I briefly worked as a telemarketer in late 90’s and had a man repeatedly tell over the phone that I was “difficult to understand and sounded like one of those Jew folks.” He then pro...
- December 3, 2010
A boy refuses to believe I’m Indian until someone sharpies a black dot on my forehead. It’s clearly visible in the yearbook photo that is taken later that day.
age: 13, eighth grade...
- December 3, 2010
Racialicious | “More Than a Meme: Microaggressions Offers a Safe Space for Sharing Short, Painful Stories”
* we’ve changed the entry form to include more about the CONTEXT of the qu...
- December 3, 2010
Credit: David Xia...
- December 3, 2010
WELL, IT’S OBVIOUS THAT YOU MUST BE PUTTING OUT. WHY WOULD A NICE, FAIR-SKINNED GUY WANT TO TALK TO SOMEONE AS BLACK AS YOU ARE? YOU’VE DONE WELL!
My fair skinned aunt...
- December 3, 2010
‘Women are traps,’ Kafka said once, ‘which lie in wait for men everywhere, in order to drag them down into the Finite.’ It’s a perfectly ordinary expression of misogyny, dispiriting in a min...
- December 3, 2010
OH, THEY’RE SO CUTE! WHERE DID YOU GET THEM?
Passerby to a white friend, married to a Japanese American, out with her kids in the stroller....
- December 3, 2010
After telling a girl I just met about the time a man pulled my Star of David off me and threw it in the gutter during the Israel-Lebanon war, she responded, “you should have known he would be of...
- December 3, 2010
A guy on the subway unzips his pants and starts masturbating next to me. When I get up and sit down elsewhere on the train, the man next to me says, “Why did you move? That’s what he wante...
- December 3, 2010
Maybe, like, in different countries, but we don’t need feminism in North America. I mean like, we’re equal so don’t be selfish.
My classmate at a liberal arts university...
- December 3, 2010
A white lecturer (who is a practicing psychologist) assumes that an Asian client married to a white man must be a mail order bride. I call her out in the class. She and another white student rapidly t...
- December 3, 2010
Arabs treat their women like shit.
...
- December 3, 2010
“I raped this shit out of that girl.” - A “friend” talking about killing a female character in World of Warcraft....
- December 3, 2010
The marriage coordinator at the church asks me if I have thought about changing my last name. My fiance and I look at each other and shake our heads no. I say that I haven’t decided whether ...
- December 3, 2010
Wow, from talking to you on the phone, I’d never know that you were a fat girl. You don’t sound fat at all.
My friend’s grandmother, upon our first meeting....
- December 2, 2010
You speak so well. You don’t sound like other black girls.
when: almost every week since I started high school...
- December 2, 2010
Friend online about the Microaggressions project: “kim jong [il] prob gets microaggressions like “i hate petty dictators” ever thought of that?”...
- December 2, 2010
So, do you feel more Asian or American?
Someone born in America...
- December 2, 2010
While at the laundromat, a white man and white woman are having a conversation about immigration. The white man turns to me and asks me where I am from. I say, “from the United States.” He...
- December 2, 2010
Have a good life, to a good but fat kid!
yearbook comment from a high school friend...
- December 2, 2010
YOU SHOULD JUST CALM DOWN AND GET OFF YOUR SOAP BOX. WE’RE ALL JUST TRYING TO HAVE FUN
at a dinner party where i’m the only person of color...
- December 2, 2010
You’d make a good possession.
My boss, when I described how my mental illness made the concept of functional adulthood seem impossible....
- December 2, 2010
Really, Regis?! (at 3:40) ...
- December 2, 2010
I know you have to be worried all the time about being raped, even on campus, but as a man I could still be mugged or something. So don’t tell me I don’t understand, I hate that!
...
- December 2, 2010
During the Oka Crisis of 1990 in Quebec when the Mohawks of Kanehsatake, along with other First Nation allies, barricaded a highway to protest Oka City Council plans to develop their burial grounds in...
- December 2, 2010
This tumblr is looking really text-y. We would love photo submissions! You know there is that one sign or poster in your neighborhood/campus that annoys you.
Artistic liberty can be liberating. We ...
- December 2, 2010
Lesbians use strap-ons, which is stupid. You might as well switch to a dick.
when: yesterday...
- December 2, 2010
My mom says she is okay with my sexuality but doesn’t want me to tell anyone else in case I change my mind.
age: 16...
- December 2, 2010
PINK NAIL POLISH, EH? WHY DON’T YOU JUST GET A RAINBOW FLAG TATTOOED ON YOUR FOREHEAD.
my boss...
- December 2, 2010
Every time someone bends down and puts their hands on their knees to talk to me because I’m only 5 feet tall....
- December 2, 2010
YOU’RE NOT REALLY NATIVE AMERICAN, OR YOU WOULDN’T BE SO WHITE.
...
- December 2, 2010
BUT WHEN WE GO THROUGH, THEY WON’T PULL US. WE LOOK NORMAL.
Fellow white, female co-worker responding to my negative feelings about airport pat-downs and scans....
- December 2, 2010
I’m a flat-chested 7th grader in science class. I lean back in my seat to stretch. (Sorry, science class with Mr. D is boring!) Mr. D says, in front of everyone, “We’re not impressed...
- December 2, 2010
I MEAN, I VOTED FOR OBAMA…
Complete non-sequitur from white guy trying to hit on me in a bar....
- December 2, 2010
My friend tells me that he doesn’t think women should be engineers because when women join a traditionally male profession, average salaries go down whereas when men join a traditionally female ...
- December 2, 2010
IF PEOPLE DIDN’T TALK ABOUT IT, RACISM WOULD GO AWAY.
when: today...
- December 2, 2010
SO DOES SHE JUST WALK AROUND KISSING GIRLS?
My best friend’s parents after finding out that I’m bisexual....
- December 2, 2010
OH, THAT’S WHY YOU DON’T HAVE AN ACCENT: YOU’RE PART WHITE.
age: 16...
- December 2, 2010
I’m not sure that men constantly commenting on my race in a sexual manner is microaggression. It feels plain aggressive to me....
- December 2, 2010
I’M DISCRIMINATED AGAINST AS A WHITE MALE. THEY LOOK FOR ANY EXCUSE TO PLAY THE RACE CARD.
when: today...
- December 2, 2010
WELL THAT GUY LOOKS SUSPICIOUS.
My dad, in response to a black man who looked both ways before crossing a street. when: Thanksgiving...
- December 2, 2010
I DON’T WANT YOUR LITTLE GIRL LAW CLERK WORKING ON THIS BRIEF; IT’S TOO IMPORTANT.
About me, a licensed attorney in two states with a BA and MA in English...
- December 2, 2010
WHY CAN’T WE JUST FORGET ABOUT SLAVERY? IT’S BEEN SO LONG, PEOPLE NEED TO GET OVER IT.
when: high school world history class...
- December 2, 2010
A friend asks me why I stand up to say the Pledge of Allegiance. My response: “Because I am an American… ?”
when: high school...
- December 2, 2010
Before we play war, can you tell me if you and your parents are from South or North Vietnam? If you’re from the North, then you have to be the other side and be the communist fighting us.
whe...
- December 2, 2010
A leader in my synagogue who identifies as liberal tells me the word “homosexual” is only offensive because I want it to be....
- December 1, 2010
You can’t have sex. You can have a sexual experience, but you can’t have sex without a penis.
My best friend after I tell him how much joy, comfort and healing my sex life has brought me...
- December 1, 2010
Being written off as “the black girl,” “person of color,” or “woman” who’s just complaining or whining when I continuously bring issues of race, ethnicity, ge...
- December 1, 2010
CHING CHONG!
Dude on the street today (emphasis ours)...
- December 1, 2010
Out to lunch with two heterosexual men when one mentions that a mutual friend of ours “doesn’t seem that gay.” The other responds, “Are you kidding me? That dude is gay as AIDS...
- December 1, 2010
You just have to tell me because it’s killing me; I can’t go on unless I hear it from you - were you promiscuous in high school?
My mom...
- December 1, 2010
We have 61 followers on tumblr! Keep sharing the love, microaggressors! (And don’t forget to contribute!)...
- December 1, 2010
After being asked for the thousandth time, “so, what ARE you?” I respond, “Indian, like from the subcontinent.” My neighbor pauses before asking me to do a rain dance....
- December 1, 2010
Wow Ivette, your test scores came back so high! And to think that you don’t look so smart!
My high School English teacher in front of my entire class, in which I am the only person of color....
- December 1, 2010
That’s my only problem with gay people - why do they have to flaunt their sexuality? I don’t feel the need to do that.
...
- December 1, 2010
After, I came out to her as asexual, my mother tells me how sad she thinks it is that I am never going to be able to experience “full love” and gives me newspaper articles on late bloomers...
- December 1, 2010
This is not a microaggression. http://twitter.com/microaggressive...
- December 1, 2010
A friend asks me what I think about the recent gay suicides. I say it feels like people only care about us when we kill ourselves. He turns away mid-sentence, starts playing with his computer and only...
- December 1, 2010
Is THAT a girl or a boy?
where: overheard in class...
- December 1, 2010
I would rape the shit out of her.
Guy next to me at a restaurant in Flushing, Queens...
- December 1, 2010
I start talking about the importance of gender equality in class. A male student comes up to me, points his finger in my face and says, “People like you are the reason why the world is a terribl...
- December 1, 2010
Random person asks me where I’m from. I say I’ve lived in multiple places. She ask why I moved so much. I say my family was in poverty and looking for work. She says, “Poor Jews! Tha...
- January 31, 2011
I am a doctor and was helping my white colleague apply a bandage to a patient’s face when the tape caught on my glove for a moment. ”Look at that,” she joked to the patient, “...
- January 31, 2011
Apparently, while racism is unacceptable, ableism is A-OK....
- January 31, 2011
At a holiday gathering, my uncle mentioned that in an old French comics the bad guys always wore turbans so you could identify them. My mother quickly chimed in that nothing had changed. ...
- January 30, 2011
You don’t look Jewish.
I’m Jewish, but half-Jewish at the same time. I identify primarily as Jewish. What does a Jew look like? Makes me feel stereotyped....
- January 30, 2011
If Rihanna likes the way it hurts, why did she leave Chris Brown?
Someone’s status on Facebook....
- January 30, 2011
Link: White, Black, Hispanic (white), Hispanic (black), Asian, American Indian
Racial categories from a NYTimes article on interracial/interethnic marriages...
- January 30, 2011
“white winter catcall” - octopus pie, by meredith gran...
- January 29, 2011
I bring my grandfather’s cowboy hat to show and tell. My teacher says, “Wow, it looks like you’re about to go work in the field!” I am Mexican. My grandfather didn’t even...
- January 29, 2011
In the first grade, I was put into ESL for being too shy. I always wondered why I had to go to the extra classes with a handful of other Asian American children when I was reading at a higher level ...
- January 29, 2011
I work up the courage to tell my father I’m asexual. He leans over the table at Panda Express and says in a very low, threatening voice, “People change.”
Fast food restaurant, age 1...
- January 28, 2011
But you’d know about that, wouldn’t you? Asian parents and overachievement and their focus on studies?
Professor to me, one of two Asian students in my psychology class in Australia in 2...
- January 28, 2011
chanelbeee:
Get your share of racially stereotypical beauty products at your local Forever 21.
...
- January 28, 2011
Goddamn you half-Japanese girls
in the Weezer song “El Scorcho.” Made me feel singled out....
- January 28, 2011
While I was at work a woman asked me if my hair is real. I told her that it was and she gave me a compliment and I thanked her. Just after I turned around to walk away, she pulled on it really har...
- January 28, 2011
I would rethink your profile picture. Employers look at facebook to screen candidates.
My dad, who cannot understand my butch presentation....
- January 28, 2011
Link: Facebook Event: Straight Pride Day
“This is not an anti-gay movement of any kind. I would just like some equality.”...
- January 28, 2011
Oh, you’ll get in anywhere you want. You got [high SAT score] and you’re black!
I’m fifteen and we’re in a group of our peers. No one points out the racism. Someone rushes ...
- January 27, 2011
Today, my roommate “explained” to me that the poor are only poor because they don’t work hard enough.
I come from a lower class family who has worked harder than anyone I know. Made ...
- January 27, 2011
I’m at a party with my white boyfriend. His friend says to him: “Wow, it’s so great you’re dating an ETHNIC girl. How did you pull that off?” Worst part: I tell my boyfr...
- January 27, 2011
Im Offended That Black People Can Call White People Racial Names But Us White People Cant Call Them Racial Names Back Or Its ‘Discrimination’
Facebook group...
- January 27, 2011
That actor speaks so well!
Older white couple at a performance of King Lear; the actor in question was a black man playing Albany. He spoke as “well” as all the other actors....
- January 27, 2011
Today I had two male friends come over to my house. Whenever I started talking or laughing very loudly, my mom would tell me off for being that way. Later on when my friends left, my mom said to me, &...
- January 26, 2011
From Colorlines,
You wouldn’t call someone a w*tback, or the n-word. Saying “illegals” is just as bad. The i-word creates an environment of hate by exploiting racial ...
- January 26, 2011
I’m waiting at the bus stop in front of my on-campus apartment. A Caucasian male in his 30’s/40’s approaches me and asks, “CAN YOU TELL ME HOW A GUY LIKE ME CAN GET A BEAUTIFUL...
- January 26, 2011
I’m just saying, I’m basically blacker than you.
Me: 26 and biracial, grew up in a predominantly white area. Boyfriend: 39 and white, grew up in mixed-race neighborhood. Made me feel ang...
- January 26, 2011
Reading the phrase, “women and minorities” or “people of color and women” over and over again in allegedly pro-feminist, anti-racist literature, as if being a woman and being a...
- January 26, 2011
Cisgender people like you…
Another person who I barely knew deciding my gender identity for me. I was infuriated beyond words....
- January 26, 2011
Native Amerian Studies boils down to ‘kill whitey’.
A classmate. My Cherokee grandmother was born and raised on a reservation. My uncle teaches Native American history classes....
- January 26, 2011
And when I call her a bitch, I’m not being sexist. I call men bitches too.
My friend earlier today when ranting about a woman who HE DIDN’T THINK WAS DOING HER JOB PROPERLY....
- January 25, 2011
I worked in a Chinese restaurant.
Barbra Streisand explaining her presence at last night’s state dinner for Chinese president Hu Jintao. (via zuky)...
- January 24, 2011
While on a congressional campaign, three of my male colleagues and I were able to listen to former House Speaker Pelosi address all DCCC members a few days before the election. They mocked her words o...
- January 24, 2011
I see Facebook statuses everywhere making fun of people with any mental illnesses; my wall is covered in the words “crazy,” “insane,” “unstable,” and “mental,...
- January 23, 2011
I’m new to the Australia. Woman who’s training me for new job out of nowhere starts telling me about where I can get ribs and greens - you know, the foods my people like. I’m black,...
- January 23, 2011
During track practice, we were doing push ups on the track and afterwards the hands of the boy next to me were stained red from the rubber. He turned to me, wiped his hands on his face and said in a f...
- January 22, 2011
I’m walking to the entrance of a store when a car comes speeding my way, almost hitting me. The driver opens the door and screams, “THIS AIN’T YOUR COUNTRY, BITCH!” I was 14 y...
- January 22, 2011
My (white) supervisor at work comes up to me first thing in the morning and says, “I’ve been wanting to do this,” and puts her hands in my curly (African American) hair. It’s...
- January 22, 2011
Of course she’ll get the nomination over me. She’s a minority.
White, upper-class, Southern male who has a lower GPA and who is not as accomplished as she....
- January 22, 2011
My white friend when describing her new boyfriend to her family: “Well he is black, but don’t worry, he’s not that type of black guy - he is successful and educated.” No...
- January 21, 2011
He’s your boyfriend? He’s so girly, I thought he was, like, your gay best friend.
A former roommate. My boyfriend and I are both queer femmes in an opposite-gender relationship. Made me ...
- January 21, 2011
God, when I got the email saying you would be my roommate I was so worried you would be stupid and racist or something, but you totally aren’t.
My Northern, private school roommate commenting ...
- January 21, 2011
Just featured on Feministing. Thanks! Still thrilled by the reception we’ve gotten....
- January 21, 2011
I’m South Asian and go by ‘Sam’. When I introduced myself to a white man at a party, he asked me what Sam was ‘short for’. When I replied ‘Samantha’, he told ...
- January 21, 2011
I work as an usher at an events arena where they were having Cirque du Soleil. An older white woman asked, “Can you tell if those are Orientals up there? They’re all so little like Orien...
- January 21, 2011
He’s been working like a nigger all week. What? I’m saying that they work hard, how can that be racist?
...
- January 19, 2011
A Christmas gift from (and drawn by) my partner’s nine-year-old cousin. Made me feel angry and sad at how ingrained body-policing and fat-shaming is....
- January 18, 2011
There is no question that the Chinese will keep working hard. Hard work is in their genes.
In a 2007 National Geographic photo book called “Inside China”, where five out of six authors a...
- January 17, 2011
I’ve been discriminated against because I’m white.
Student in my breakout group on identity and race that my school was holding in honor of Martin Luther King Jr. Day....
- January 17, 2011
But weren’t you guys dating? It’s different if you’re dating.
A female friend when I told her that my ex-boyfriend had tried to sexually assault me. He had just walked into the ...
- January 15, 2011
Facebook’s new profile doesn’t allow you to leave the gender field blank - you are required to choose between male and female, he and she....
- January 15, 2011
They probably just had a crush on you.
What my white father said when I told him two white students called me the n-word on the bus....
- January 15, 2011
After preaching about violence, misogyny, and hate crimes at my church the day after the mass shooting in Tucson, a white man who was serving with me at church told me: 1. Black people can’t say...
- January 15, 2011
Whoa, I didn’t think you’d listen to this kind of music. It’s nearly all the same as mine!
A white boy to me (a Muslim English Pakistani girl) whilst going through my ipod. He was ...
- January 14, 2011
The thing I hate the most about Microaggressions is the fact that it reminds me of the oppression I feel on a daily basis. So when all of my white friends say, “You are being over-sensitiveR...
- January 14, 2011
So what, like, you built some teepees?
Classmate. After a meaningful summer of helping to repair houses on a Native American reservation, I felt excited to share my experience with the class. Surpri...
- January 14, 2011
“Man, there was so much drama at work, but as soon as the girls were out of the room it was really quiet! It was because of all the estrogen!” Said while I was amongst some male friends...
- January 14, 2011
A few friends were over the other day. One guy picked up an issue of Bitch that I had on the table and said, “Why the hell is this magazine named Bitch?” When I explained that it was a fem...
- January 13, 2011
I’m a black woman. My black female friend once told me that a white guy once said to her, “You’re really pretty for a black girl.” And her respone was, “I know.”
Ma...
- January 13, 2011
You know, you talk about being a lesbian a lot, and your father and I aren’t the only adults who find that off-putting.
My mom during a phone conversation on Christmas. The comment was meant to ju...
- January 13, 2011
I hate when parents give their kids ghetto names. Shaniqua, Laquisha… how could you do that to your kid?
White girl...
- January 12, 2011
I’m talking to someone I’ve known for about 7 years about what my plans are after graduation. I tell him I’m not sure what I’ll do between schools. He says, “Do you think...
- January 12, 2011
Someone is halfway through a racist anecdote, sneaks a glance at me, carefully articulates, “African-American” as opposed to “black,” and, satisfied in their PC-ness, continues...
- January 12, 2011
I know that what happened to the Native American population was wrong, and that it was a horrible injustice to them, but why, after years and years, am I forced to feel guilty for something I had abso...
- January 11, 2011
I was sitting at my brother’s basketball game with my mother when a woman sat next to me and put her purse down. She took one look at me (a person of color) and moved her purse to her side away ...
- January 11, 2011
Hey, he could come with us next time we cruise to the Bahamas and translate for the natives!
My dad, speaking of my Jamaican husband, who of course speaks English… Just like the people in the ...
- January 11, 2011
If I didn’t know what you looked like, I would have thought English was your first language.
My high school English teacher. I’m Asian and English IS my first language....
- January 11, 2011
That skirt is too short. I don’t care what you think about yourself, but imagine what the BOYS will think about you. You don’t want them to think those kinds of things, do you!?
...
- January 10, 2011
Man, I’m thirsty! Hey — what does a guy have to to do get some water around this place?
White male undergraduate student to me while waiting to see his professor’s office hours. I...
- January 10, 2011
Every time a man on the phone calls me “miss” or “darling” or “honey.”
- 19 year-old office receptionist...
- January 10, 2011
In a “safe space” discussion about class issues at a private university, no one says they belong to the “upper class” or “lower class.”
Rather, they use “uppe...
- January 10, 2011
Tell the class what the minority perspective on this is.
Professor to me, the only non-white student in a political science class at UCLA....
- January 9, 2011
Every time my mother leaves a newspaper article about AIDS by my seat at the kitchen table.
I’m 21, when I’m home for break, for the past five years since I came out...
- January 9, 2011
We didn’t expect you - we thought based on your name you were a black male.
Potential employer to me while walking into an interview...
- January 9, 2011
Professor: “You might be interested in my research. I’m studying the migration patterns of affluent Hong Kong families to North America.”
To an Asian Canadian whose family has neve...
- January 9, 2011
People there are beautiful.
A remark I’ve heard several times in conversations about countries like Mexico, Guatemala, Nigeria, Pakistan, the entire continent of Africa/”over there.̶...
- January 8, 2011
Well, of course life is easy for you, you’re Malay. It’s not like you need to be smart to get a scholarship.
Co-worker commenting on the worthiness of my university degree. Made me feel...
- January 8, 2011
A security guard approaches me at an upscale shopping district. I am the only black person sitting in the waiting area. I am waiting for a friend and have been sitting for two minutes. The secur...
- January 8, 2011
THERE ARE LOTS OF REASONABLE FEMINISTS, LIKE YOU, BUT THEN THERE ARE THOSE ONE WHO JUST, LIKE, HATE MEN.
A generally-liberal male classmate/coworker....
- January 7, 2011
colorlines:
“The image above appears on Rush Limbaugh’s Web site. Is any American more adept at exploiting racial dog whistles? It’s always egregious eno...
- January 7, 2011
Whenever my girlfriend and I go out holding hands, we’re leered at, catcalled, or occasionally followed around by men asking us for a “hot bisexual threesome.”
I hate being objectifi...
- January 7, 2011
Go back to Japan!
Random slur by some white teenagers as I walked home from work. I was born in Canada, raised in Canada, but my parents just happen to be Vietnamese. Made me feel pretty shocked &am...
- January 7, 2011
One of my coworkers (the only black male staff member in a school predominately serving students of color) grows his hair out into an Afro. Our white supervisor makes several jokes about how he needs ...
- January 6, 2011
Spanish time?
A white teacher to a Latina student asking why she came to class late. Made me feel alone, scared, frustrated, & confused....
- January 6, 2011
Kit Kat: $0.75
Skittles: $0.75
Potato Chips: $0.50
Hot Pocket: $1.00
Vietnamese Prostitute: TWO DOLLAH
Scribbled underneath the rest of the student store menu. I’m one of three Vietnamese kids...
- January 6, 2011
Hi folks, this is a workshop in Brooklyn, NY that was sent to us for those interested/in the area, hosted by RISE (a “grassroots collective of social workers and activists” in NYC).
https:...
- January 6, 2011
Every time my professors dock me points for “neglecting” the -a, the -ette, the taa’ marbuuta - feminine word endings [in different languages] - when referring to myself....
- January 6, 2011
Looks like you only got the good genes. You don’t look Native American at all.
Made me feel angry....
- January 5, 2011
I’m surprised your so smart, because you’re very girly and silly. I see you as more of a customer service worker rather than a professional; I can’t picture you as a professional.
...
- January 5, 2011
What? But that’s a guy movie!
Theater employee after she asked what movie I had seen as I was walking out. For the record, True Grit was very good and I’m pretty sure my genitals don’t really ...
- January 4, 2011
So you’re really not into men? Like, really really not into men? Are you sure?
A male professor in my graduate program at a department barbeque. My sexual orientation was more important than ...
- January 4, 2011
Well, they’ll let just anyone be a cop these days.
My mom while passing a female person of color cop directing traffic...
- January 4, 2011
I can’t give you hormones, because then you’ll start thinking like a woman! You can’t change that!
Endocronologist, one week after he said he would help me. I walked out and didn&...
- January 4, 2011
A submission we received:
I know that this blog is dedicated to microaggressions, but I wanted to suggest the possibility of starting a blog of…I don’t know if there’s a word…...
- January 3, 2011
We’ve opened up a comment/discussion space for each “microaggression.” Please feel free to ask questions & share why an entry may/not resonate with you - just click on the speech...
- January 3, 2011
Now let me just play Devil’s Advocate…
Every guy who feels entitled to insert himself into a conversation about sexism in order to say something ignorant and sexist....
- January 3, 2011
Either that guy doesn’t really care about his religion, or he’s just dating her for sex.
Coworker’s comments regarding a Sikh man who walked in with this girlfriend, who was white....
- January 3, 2011
There’s no such thing as verbal abuse.
A white, male, cis-gender cop...
- January 2, 2011
Shopping for Christmas cards, I found a beautiful card with a drawing of two black children playing with a snowman. It was in the “AA” cards section, and by looking at the rest of the &#...
- January 2, 2011
My advisor at a top medical school told me that in order to advance professionally, I should act more like what people expect from an Asian woman - more demure....
- January 2, 2011
“Little blacks girls don’t grow up to make movies. They grow up to have babies and go to jail.”
- My third grade teacher to me when I told my peers I wanted to be a film director. Ma...
- January 2, 2011
That was two girls!
My aunt said this to me every time we saw a lesbian couple at the mall. Every time she said this she had a really disgusted look on her face. She doesn’t know, but I’...
- January 1, 2011
White friend: “Hey, look! We’re in a car full of foreigners!” Out of the three minorities, one person emigrated from Europe when he was 9. Me and the other person are Asian-Americans...
- January 1, 2011
My (ex)boss never allowed me to talk to a male customer for more than a few minutes, as he claimed all of them only wanted to sleep with me… but he spends hours talking to girls 20 years younger...
- January 1, 2011
That’s retarded.
...
- January 1, 2011
I’m sure your new haircut will get you some nice ladies”.
receptionist after seeing my haircut. I’m a gay man with a partner of 4 years....
- February 28, 2011
As a transman I am now included in “bonding-through-misogyny” with male strangers.
A guy asked me about my kid. I said she’s amazing. He said, how are you with having a daughter? I...
- February 28, 2011
At least, this time, Muslims are not privileged.
My ex-flatmate, about the banning of burqa. I’m 22 from France....
- February 28, 2011
Nearly every day, someone refers to my boyfriend as “my Asian.” Nearly every day, someone makes a joke about penis size. Nearly every day, my relationship is someone’s joke because I...
- February 28, 2011
I use the word “gypsy” because I identify with the lifestyle.
A non-Roma telling me why she used the word “gypsy” in her username, never mind that it’s a racial slur. M...
- February 28, 2011
I have only recently come to terms with being transgender. I call my mom who I don’t talk to much about a few things. I casually ask if I ever said I wanted to be a boy as a kid. She says: “Other ...
- February 27, 2011
Women who are out after dark in skirts or dresses deserve to be raped.
Comment made by a male colleague when we were discussing safety precautions at university campuses. Made me feel like an object...
- February 27, 2011
An atheist?! But you are so nice!
The implication being that the only possible way to be a good/moral/nice person is to have a religion. This is often followed up by statements such as “Are...
- February 27, 2011
At a business lunch with co-workers and a client, celebrating his recent promotion. The waiter drops off my lemonade and says “Here you go, sweetie”. I am a woman. My male supervisor is on...
- February 27, 2011
Oh, it doesn’t count if it’s your boyfriend. That’s basically implied consent.
My friend commenting on the topic of rape. I was 17 in high school Psychology class. Made me feel dis...
- February 27, 2011
I call you that because that’s what you are. You’re Chinese. You’re Oriental. It’s what you are.
Girl in high school. Made me feel offended, angry, frustrated....
- February 27, 2011
I don’t like the word feminist. We should all be equalists!
A performance called “Me Too” examining the racial gender structure. Made me feel angry that you believe in unicorns....
- February 27, 2011
Hari Kondabolu - “Ethnic Needs” ...
- February 26, 2011
Boss introduces new employee and gives her a new name that only has the first letter in common with her actual Middle Eastern name because she can’t say her real name. Made me feel embarrassed, ...
- February 26, 2011
The heterosexual transactivist who told my boyfriend that by ‘letting’ me continue to identify myself as a lesbian, he was ‘allowing’ me to disrespect him. I can’t decide...
- February 26, 2011
My mother is Dutch-Indonesian. A woman asked her for directions at the airport, and upon my mother’s response, the woman opened her eyes wide and exclaimed, “Oh! You speak English so well!...
- February 26, 2011
Anything can happen. After all, you are a woman. You can always get fall in love, get married and have kids. And that’s important too.
Reminder from my 40-some year old, male, heterocentric g...
- February 26, 2011
Why can’t all Black Women wear their hair like yours?
White classmate to a black woman with natural hair. I didn’t feel like explaining breaking down Eurocentric standards of beauty comb...
- February 25, 2011
After you strip off his makeup and clothes, biologically he’s still a man”.
A girl in my gender studies class, responding to a question about the ‘supposed’ difference betwee...
- February 25, 2011
Why would you waste those four years when you could start having a family?
My boyfriend’s mother in response to my announcement that I’m attending university next year. My boyfriend knew...
- February 25, 2011
The idea of the noble savage is that primitive things are better. So African drums are better than Beethoven. Which may have something to it, until you hear too much rap music, and then you think prim...
- February 25, 2011
I was leaving my apartment to go to a hardcore show and I am the only minority (Haitian American) in my building. My neighbors were drinking out front and asked where I was going and I told them and t...
- February 24, 2011
My girlfriend expressing indignation over me feeling worried about being trans when “nothing bad has ever happened” to me personally. As if my fears about rejection and/or violence would o...
- February 24, 2011
Look at her. That’s no fair. Why do I have to walk? She’s taking advantage.
I’m a wheelchair user in a large museum. I felt like my struggles with accessibility were nothing and th...
- February 24, 2011
You’re going to have to spell your name for me
Librarian after taking one look at me (the only black girl at my high school) while my white friends & I are signing up....
- February 24, 2011
“You’re being too sensitive, this “Gifts for Him, Gifts for Her” segregation is just for reference!” - my friend on an airplane af...
- February 24, 2011
You’re going to Old Compton Street? You want to be careful, it’s queer city up that way.
My Dad to me. For the record I came out when I was 16 (I am 19 now). He’s still in denial. ...
- February 24, 2011
But instead of complaining about the ignorance of society and ridiculousness of modern fashion (which is run and supported by so many self centred, materialistic people that i dont think there’s...
- February 24, 2011
I recently looked in the paper that serves the metro-east area of the city I live in to find race demographics from the 2010 census for the cities and towns in the area. The races listed were “b...
- February 23, 2011
A customer I am helping comments that she likes my (short, faux-hawk) haircut and asks where I get it cut. I reply, “Thank you! My fiancée cuts it for me.” She responds, “Oh! ...
- February 23, 2011
My older, male, white boss called me white-washed. I was the only black girl in the room with him and ten other coworkers because I currently live in the suburbs, attended a private school and “...
- February 23, 2011
Why don’t you want to straighten you’re hair? You don’t wanna be pretty?
My mother in a conversation about hair styling. I am of color. Made me feel uncomfortable, unattractive....
- February 23, 2011
I’m a white male with PTSD to a point that interferes with my ability to function in the real world. On a daily basis I’m told that I don’t understand “real pain” and that my suffering is ...
- February 23, 2011
When taking our biracial son to the emergency room, my African American husband makes mention of his urethra when discussing my son’s illness. The white, middle aged male doctor says to him, ...
- February 23, 2011
Commercial by Red Bull ...
- February 22, 2011
Tired of always explaining to my white, French flat-mate every time the subject of Asian food comes into conversation that no, Chinese people actually don’t eat dogs....
- February 22, 2011
I have none; there is no such thing. Why does everyone want to make ‘Blackness’ a thing apart from ‘humanness’ or ‘studentness.’
Source: Yale Blackness, a project...
- February 22, 2011
I’m Japanese American. I was doing some homework for a Japanese class during lunch at my college campus. One guy passing by saw what I’m doing and started saying “ching chong ching c...
- February 21, 2011
So, is it true what they say about Asians?
Several people on different occasions after finding out my boyfriend is Chinese. Since when is it appropriate to ask an acquaintance how big her boyfriend&...
- February 21, 2011
Link: a list of privilege lists
While this is not a link about microaggressions specifically, it is an interesting link about the related topic of privilege - experienced by individuals but symptom...
- February 21, 2011
I followed my then-fiance to the gas station and we talked at the pumps before he went inside to get a drink. A random white man approached and asked me if “that man” was bothering me. I t...
- February 21, 2011
My boss promoted me from his assistant to a consultant. In the same conversation, he said that he was concerned that clients would discriminate against me because of my weight, and that my weight wo...
- February 21, 2011
You’re a lesbian? Why? You’re so pretty you could have any man you want?
The male half of a middle-aged heterosexual couple to me during a UK Gay & Lesbian Pride Parade. Made me feel...
- February 21, 2011
I wouldn’t let someone talk to me like that.
A former friend after I disclosed to her that I was being severely psychologically abused by my partner of nearly 20 years. Did she think that ther...
- February 20, 2011
I’m at a cafe having lunch with my brother. The server brings our drinks and automatically hands me the Diet Coke, even though he took our order and knows I ordered regular Coke. I’m a fat...
- February 20, 2011
I’m sick of hearing all this stuff about feminism. I’m a white male, does that make me rich? I’m not ‘empowered’ just because I’m a guy. Do you know how many schola...
- February 20, 2011
I was watching Miss America the other night and lots of the girls are so pretty, but not really American. They’re exotic like you!
Old woman at the grocery store. I’m a mixed race Latina...
- February 20, 2011
I’m at the bar with a group of female friends and we meet a friendly and engaging group of guys. I am fat, and coming back from the bathroom I overhear the men quietly arguing amongst each other...
- February 19, 2011
White fraternity guys at University of Washington pull up in a car and yell “black power” at a black male student. The embarrassment I saw in his face at their sarcastic, humiliating r...
- February 19, 2011
I’ve seen you around and always wanted to talk to you. You just have this wonderful… ethnicity about you.
20-something white guy at the library....
- February 19, 2011
Oh, so being normal has to have a special word now?
My mom, after she asked what an article she read meant by “cis-woman.” ...
- February 18, 2011
Saturday Night Live: Estro-maxx ...
- February 18, 2011
The older white man next to me on my flight asks me what I am reading. It turns out we work in similar fields. We talk and exchange business cards. As we leave the flight, he tells me (a biracial Asia...
- February 18, 2011
I want to make bumper stickers that say ISLAM IS NOT A PEACEFUL RELIGION and sell them.
My aunt to my entire extended family. Made me feel baffled, angry, upset....
- February 18, 2011
I find it rather funny when girls who wear rather revealing clothing complain about being touched inappropriately. It’s like walking around with expensive jewelry and getting robbed, then compla...
- February 17, 2011
boltupright:
What part of NOT LOL are you missing, asshole?
...
- February 17, 2011
I asked my friends to boycott a bar due to homophobic comments from the staff. With the ulterior motive of not wanting to leave their favorite drinking spot, almost all of my white liberal friends ask...
- February 17, 2011
Apparently, feeling uncomfortable about power and privilege is something we try very hard to accomplish....
- February 17, 2011
When people ask why you’re on disability, I just tell them you have an anxiety disorder. It’s better.
My mom. (I’m on disability for depression.)...
- February 16, 2011
A high school counselor walks past a girl wearing the same outfit as me before saying that I am dressed inappropriately and that I must change or be suspended. My breasts are a lot bigger than hers. w...
- February 16, 2011
You smell different. I have always dated Caucasian women before and I prefer they way they smell.
A white guy I used to date when I confronted him about cheating on me. I felt insulted, humiliated a...
- February 16, 2011
Photograph of Elton John and partner David Furnish with newborn baby on the cover of Us Weekly, covered by the management of Harps grocery store in Arkansas wit...
- February 16, 2011
Words only have power if you give it to them.
(Many) white people when I complain about the usage of the n-word....
- February 16, 2011
My white neighbor asks me to give him the name of a rap song, any rap song, that is better than Shakespeare’s poetry. He then tells me, in a discussion about women film directors, that he feels ...
- February 15, 2011
I’m sitting in a restaurant with my husband and mother-in-law. Our server comes to take our order. He has a soft, somewhat feminine sounding voice. As he walks away, my mother-in-law turns...
- February 15, 2011
Credit: White Whine...
- February 15, 2011
I grew up in a town where no one was racist so we could get away with saying stuff like that because no one really meant it in a racist way.
Ringing up my groceries, trying not to laugh in his face....
- February 15, 2011
Credit: Blush And Mumble...
- February 14, 2011
I break up with my trans girlfriend. Friends, family and acquaintances breathe a collective sigh of relief as they can now make tranny jokes again. ...
- February 14, 2011
How come girls are all vegetarian these days?
A male friend’s response to the fact that I am vegetarian. I’m genderqueer, but he doesn’t know that. Made me feel like I’d been...
- February 14, 2011
My older male boss looks pointedly between my lesbian coworker and me, rolls his eyes and announces, “I suppose boys are out of fashion.”
Made me feel uncomfortable & objectified....
- February 14, 2011
You know, I wasn’t going to hire you when I saw your name. I was like ‘I’m not going to be able to pronounce that.’
My supervisor at the college bookstore. My name is Edelio,...
- February 14, 2011
Popped up on my Facebook newsfeed. Made me feel sad, because these ideas have not changed, and still show up in commercials today. ...
- February 13, 2011
I don’t want no Yellow Man bagging my groceries.
After being pushed to the side by an older White man. Made me feel shocked, hurt, ostricized....
- February 13, 2011
Father of the bride tells his son he can’t bring his partner to the wedding, because other guests might be uncomfortable with seeing a gay couple. Father proceeds to tell son the event’s n...
- February 13, 2011
Your mom and I will support you as long as you date women. It doesn’t even matter if she’s black, as long as it’s a woman.
My parents found my homosexuality so abhorrent that ̶...
- February 13, 2011
I call my dad to talk about how inspiring the events in Egypt are. I describe how happy I am to finally see images of Arabs in the media that do not portray them as dangerous, primitive religious ze...
- February 13, 2011
earleydaysyet:
“Haha! Look at the funny people dressed all weird-like, instead of what ‘normal’ people wear to the gym! Too hilarious!”
This makes me c...
- February 13, 2011
My husband and I live on a fairly busy street in a pretty diverse, quiet and safe neighborhood. I’m standing in front of my house with my mother-in-law when a car containing two African-American...
- February 13, 2011
You’re Middle Eastern? Really? It’s so good to know there are actually decent Middle Eastern people out there.
I was working door-to-door in Iowa after 9/11. I was 19. The thing was, you...
- February 12, 2011
What did you expect, letting Muslims in the military?
My Sunday School teacher’s wife discussing the recent shooting at a U.S. Military base in November of 2009. No one disagreed with her. In ...
- February 12, 2011
This was the kind of place that you take your mistress to.
A professor during a lecture reminiscing about a beautiful hotel where an important conference was held. Made me feel terribly alone in a r...
- February 12, 2011
Domino’s: Our Hot Wings Are Too Hot for Women, Hispanics
Credit: Consumerist...
- February 12, 2011
That burrito place is good, but I don’t eat in because more than 5 minutes in that place & you smell like a Mexican.
White hipster talking to his friend. I don’t think he perceived t...
- February 11, 2011
This was the kind of place that you take your mistress to.
A professor during a lecture reminiscing about a beautiful hotel where an important conference was held. Made me feel terribly alone in a r...
- February 11, 2011
This is how I feel about the pressure for women to shave and wax their body hair. (I’m a white, cis girl with thick, dark Italian hair.)...
- February 11, 2011
We’ll give you this one, trust me Andre is not going to college.
A white teacher giving a white male student a college application form that was supposed to be for Andre (a black male)....
- February 11, 2011
During a discussion in class on World War Two, I mentioned that my grandmother was a Holocaust survivor. My AP US History teacher told me this made me biased and I couldn’t participate in the di...
- February 11, 2011
Link: Research project on public violence against queer women of color in New York City
Please consider participating in or spreading the word about this project!
inberlynn:
I am currently seekin...
- February 11, 2011
But you’re not REALLY disabled. You look so pretty!
I’m 22. I mentioned how I still can’t work due to my struggle with fibromyalgia. Conversation with a friend. Made me feel like n...
- February 11, 2011
Hi Miss [woman with a PhD], do you know where Dr. [male colleague without a PhD]’s office is?
I’m a 32-year old woman with a PhD who works at a private liberal arts college. ...
- February 10, 2011
“The Unwritten Stories,” by Rachelle Scarfó. ...
- February 10, 2011
I called my friend out on a domestic abuse joke, but she said it was ‘just a joke’....
- February 10, 2011
After coming out to a coworker, she was excited that she had “another gay boyfriend.” Ever since then she has treated me very stereotypically asking me if I notice minute changes in her ...
- February 10, 2011
You’re Filipina? But your eyes are so big!
A new acquaintance, over dinner, while making a gesture to indicate how my Asian eyes ought to look and how confusingly round they are. I had to e...
- February 10, 2011
Complete stranger to me (a woman) working at a food stall: “Hey, smile! Why won’t you smile? You’d be pretty if you smiled!”...
- February 10, 2011
Credit: Blush And Mumble...
- February 10, 2011
lol @ people still bitching about the TSA body scanners. I’ve been scanned and pat down. Took less than 10 seconds.
The Twitter feed of a white, able-bodied, cisgender male of my acquaintance....
- February 9, 2011
Oh, I see you have someone new here!” *nervous laughter*
White middle-class suburbanites remarking on the new employee I hired at my coffee shop, who just happens to be black. Funny how they...
- February 9, 2011
Ahh! I love how straight it is! You know, dear, when you wear your hair like that, it makes you look more…professional, or even exotic!
My boyfriend’s white mom over dinner to me, the o...
- February 9, 2011
Hey little girl. I don’t think I’ve seen you before. You must be new. Are you sure you can lift that? Here, let me take that from you.
Older male who works in the stockroom at work and s...
- February 8, 2011
Is that a man with that pink bag!? IS THAT A MAN?! Wow.
My mom pointing to a person walking into the grocery store with children. Made me feel sad and unhappy because I couldn’t apologize....
- February 8, 2011
What are you?
As a multiracial American, I will get this question for the rest of my life. It is a question that stabs me every time someone asks it....
- February 8, 2011
asiansnotstudying:
So yeah… that was fucked.
...
- February 8, 2011
When “ghetto” is used to describe something predominantly black. ...
- February 8, 2011
Little black American boy: Don’t make her mad! She’ll come at us with a spear!
I was in Pre-K, and the other kids had just realized that I was Nigerian. They had been making fun of me, and...
- February 7, 2011
Oh, cutie!
Two young men to me as we passed, uncomfortably close on a snowy sidewalk. Made me feel angry, threatened, guilty....
- February 7, 2011
At a party a white acquaintance mentions to me that he saw someone who looked exactly like me walking around campus. I laugh and move on, but later in the evening I overhear him telling my friend ho...
- February 7, 2011
You are very ambitious for a girl.
Statement made by my boss during my annual review. I was the only female on his entire team....
- February 6, 2011
Poor Jews! That’s like an oxymoron!
Random person who asks me where I’m from. I say I’ve lived multiple places. She ask why I moved so much. I say my family was in poverty and look...
- February 6, 2011
In my statistics class this morning in a discussion of basic polls and data-gathering, my professor uses gender as the example and explains that the two categories are male and female, and you have to...
- February 6, 2011
I know, isn’t her hair crazy today? She’s going to do something about it today. I can’t believe you went to school like that.
A white co-worker of mine talking to a white student a...
- February 5, 2011
juellasaurus:
Rush Limbaugh: Still a racist. Jorge Rivas reports.
...
- February 5, 2011
rad-emp:
And that’s a good thing? Just an observation? Uh……
...
- February 5, 2011
Don’t worry, we can fix you.
My friends when I came out of the closet....
- February 4, 2011
In elementary school, I was absent the day we signed up for a game tournament, so my classmates and/or teacher signed me up for Chinese checkers. I am half Chinese and rubbish at Chinese checkers....
- February 4, 2011
I told my dad about how I found a new dentist close to school. The first thing he had to ask was if the dentist was white or Asian. First of all, what’s with white being the unmarked race in o...
- February 4, 2011
A guy approached me at a party and asked for my number. Told me I was just his type: not “too hood” or “too ghetto”. I looked like one of those educated black women....
- February 4, 2011
Are you really going to let a GIRL beat you?
a mother to her young son while we were both struggling with our fear of heights. I’m a 19 year old female, at my university’s gym. Made me...
- February 3, 2011
At a campus discussion about [Amy Chua’s] Wall Street Journal article on Chinese parenting, other participants minimize my own physical and emotional abuse as a Chinese-American child by saying ...
- February 3, 2011
The choices:1. White2. Hispanic3. Asian4. Black5. Native American6. Other
I hate being ‘other’.
- Any statistical survey....
- February 3, 2011
Every time some woman turns to me and goes “Isn’t he hot?” in relation to some guy. Fully expecting that I will respond in a heterosexual way, and safe in the fact that no one will r...
- February 3, 2011
SMILE!
A middle-aged man to me, a college-aged female barista behind the bar, working through a rush and not directly serving customers. I’ve ONLY EVER HEARD MALE CUSTOMERS INSTRUCTING MY FEMA...
- February 2, 2011
An older male classmate I have never talked to before makes a joke about women while we wait for a meeting to start. People laugh. I make a face. He says, “Oh, don’t be mad.”
In law ...
- February 2, 2011
It’s definitely not just a label. WHETHER YOU’RE A BOY OR A GIRL DEFINES EVERYTHING YOU ARE.
A male teacher (9th grade biology) after I expressed my views on sexism and transgender right...
- February 2, 2011
Men are just better at some things. That’s just the way it is. Like men are better at driving cars or flying airplanes. But you sure look pretty.
Elderly male client says this to me regardi...
- February 1, 2011
Thing is, it’s ok if some fucking stupid lesbian activist bint says really harsh things about men, but if some equally stupid guy does it, it’s evil and sexist and chauvinistic. Just shows...
- February 1, 2011
An old lady started talking to me on the subway platform. We exchanged pleasantries.
Lady: YOU KNOW, THERE’S AN ENGLISH LANGUAGE CLASS at a place just outside of the station. It’s free, ev...
- February 1, 2011
I’m just saying, I’m BASICALLY BLACKER THAN YOU.
My then-boyfriend (a white man) to me (a dark-skinned multiracial woman). His reasoning was that I’m from a predominantly white Nor...
- February 1, 2011
The Chinese people are very individual. I mean, they are not like the Japanese that are obedient. They’re very — they’re like Jews, really, except that there is a lot more of them. And you know,...
- March 31, 2011
You wore a skirt to this show? What, are you trying to get raped?
Teenage boy to me a me, a 20 year-old woman at a Crystal Castles concert. Made me feel objectified and dehumanized....
- March 31, 2011
Are there really that many gay people?!
My mother was looking at a photography project with twenty pictures of gay and trans identified people. ...
- March 31, 2011
We have a Facebook Page! Feel free to head on over and like it. :)...
- March 31, 2011
You’ll be fine! Just talk like a white person.
A white job-training counselor speaking to a young man of color about his upcoming job-interview....
- March 31, 2011
I am a 19 year-old bisexual woman and an RA at my college. Among many other events that I planned last fall for my residents, I included two that involved LGBT issues. My supervisor said, “I kno...
- March 30, 2011
You guys can blame racism and sexism if you fail. If you’re a white male and you fail at life, what can you blame?
I’m an Asian woman, he is white Australian male. During a conversation ...
- March 30, 2011
Wheeling down the road in my neat little sporty wheelchair, and a group of men sticking their heads out of the betting shop door to clap at me and cheer me on. Made me feel patronised and mildly uns...
- March 30, 2011
People continually poke fun at me for having bad driving skills simply because I am an Asian woman. In reality, most people I know failed their driving tests at least once, whereas I passed my first...
- March 30, 2011
Donate
Dear friends and allies,
This project’s work has always demanded a bit of time and, recently, a bit of funding as well. Please think about donating any amount you can to help us keep this pr...
- March 30, 2011
It’s just so sad. It’s like… how can they even begin to think about gender when they have all of this class stratification. I can’t imagine what it would be like to that kind o...
- March 29, 2011
I was in court representing a developmentally disabled client and the judge kept equating disabled people with children. It was incredibly condescending and paternalistic. He kept acting as if he wa...
- March 29, 2011
You must be new, they keep getting such cute nurses! I heard a medical student was coming in to discuss my medications with me, where is he?
Said to me when (I, a female medical student) entered th...
- March 29, 2011
How do you keep your schoolgirl figure?
Older male aviation worker while I was ordering a small frozen yogurt to go with my meal at a healthy food/snacks place. I’m pretty thin and get a lot o...
- March 28, 2011
If I did do Teach For America I’d probably be placed in the Mississippi Delta and would just end up being like, ‘OK kids! Go outside and make some mud pies to prepare for your future caree...
- March 28, 2011
The lecturer in a university lecture mentioned how the second-wave feminist movement was criticised by black feminists for privileging white, middle-class women. The white middle class guy behind me s...
- March 28, 2011
Are you on your period?
Said to me, a cis woman, countless times when I’ve been angry....
- March 28, 2011
There’s a difference between a racist and someone who tells racist jokes.
My friend discussing racist comments made by another friend. Made me sad, angry, exasperated, ashamed....
- March 27, 2011
How come you act so gay but you’re like the straightest guy ever?
Said to me by someone in my class. I am bisexual. Made me feel angry and frusterated, like I had to pick one or the other....
- March 27, 2011
Eastern Europeans are trashy. I know, because when my Eastern European brother-in-law got married, women at his reception wore fishnet tights and black lace gloves. This hyper-sexual culture is one of...
- March 26, 2011
In high school, my college counselor implored me to take the Spanish SAT II and apply to specific small liberal arts colleges that have “great financial aid programs for impoverished minorities&...
- March 26, 2011
I walk into a gas station market in California with about ten of my Latina/o and black high school students to buy snacks for our college road trip, and within five minutes, we hear, “SECURITY C...
- March 26, 2011
Look at all those hot chicks. Doesn’t that make you want to at least try being straight?
Friend, to me, 21 and gay....
- March 26, 2011
News
* We’ve just reached 3,000 Tumblr followers!
* As you may have noticed, our URL has changed. You can now find us simply at http://microaggressions.com. If you have any problems accessing ou...
- March 25, 2011
I asked for advanced science in 9th grade because I wanted my courses to count towards college admission. My high school counselor said, “Oh, but you’re not going to college.” I ...
- March 25, 2011
Everyone at the hospital where I work wears scrubs, so it is sometimes hard to tell what any particular person’s role is. Invariably when a new Latina woman shows up, someone will ask if sheR...
- March 24, 2011
There’s nothing wrong with a woman having a picture of her girlfriend at your desk. I mean, everyone likes to have pictures of their loved ones at their workplace. Unless, *giggles* she’s ...
- March 24, 2011
That’s because you’re a girl; you don’t get what it’s all about.
A white guy in my grade to me, an Asian female, when I said I didn’t think architecture was interesting...
- March 24, 2011
You know how how Latinos are… they aren’t as motivated.
Said to me, a white Latino, in New York when I was 30 years old....
- March 23, 2011
We call Chinese to everyone who looks Asian. That’s what I meant.
Miss Universe 1996, in reference to her Twitter post calling North and South Korea “the Chinas”....
- March 23, 2011
Youtube: ‘Hir’ Poem - Brave New Voices ...
- March 23, 2011
You don’t need any dessert. You could live off your body fat for three months.
My grandma after dinner. My parents just sat there silently. Made me feel like crying....
- March 23, 2011
I go to a store with my girlfriend and she stands next to me. As I pay for my goods, the clerk always strikes up a conversation with her and not me, despite me being the one paying. I am completely ig...
- March 23, 2011
Well face it, whenever you see a guy with a rag on his head on the street you get a bit nervous, you know?
As I was complaining to an aquaintance about an anti-Muslim teacher. Made me feel hurt, ang...
- March 23, 2011
My mom is very supportive of my little sister’s relationship with her boyfriend but says I can’t know yet and doesn’t want me to find a girlfriend because I’m gay. I’m 17...
- March 22, 2011
Hey mister mailman,
Do you duty!
Here comes the lady with the African booty!
She can do the pom-poms
She can do the splits.
Most of all, she can kiss, kiss, kiss!
High school students demonstrating ...
- March 22, 2011
I just think that the feminist movement glorifies obesity. It should focus on being healthy, because what it’s doing now is just as bad as the mainstream media!
Male friend and Gender Studies ...
- March 22, 2011
You and [the only other Asian kid in the school] should go to homecoming together. I mean, he’s cute, isn’t he? I wouldn’t know, I’m not Asian…
Friend from the same rur...
- March 22, 2011
We’re in the process of moving onto http://www.microaggressions.com! Please hold tight!...
- March 22, 2011
Don’t you ever think that they only look for ways to be offended?
My mother while talking about my argumentative paper about microaggressions - “they” being other races, sexualitie...
- March 21, 2011
I wouldn’t call myself a feminist anymore. I think I’m a realist now. I think maybe we’re in denial and that men and women aren’t necessarily capable of the same things. Maybe...
- March 21, 2011
You should know this! You’re Asian!
A black girl snapped at me when she asked me for help on some calculus homework and I said I don’t know how. I hate math and can’t wrap my head ...
- March 20, 2011
You know, it’s just - if two women walk in, it kind of discredits us as a firm.
Partner in our firm (i.e. my boss) re: another woman associate and I potentially attending an outside event....
- March 20, 2011
I’m among a group of Chinese Americans at a Chinese restaurant for my mother’s birthday dinner. Seated next to us are a group of white couples. The Chinese waiter ask them if they would li...
- March 20, 2011
Any time a male stranger refers to me, a petite woman, as cute, tiny, adorable, or wants to pick me up - and how they’ll laugh when I tell them it’s inappropriate. Makes me angry, frust...
- March 20, 2011
Ew, why are there two black guys kissing?
I was watching a documentary for a class and my roommate’s boyfriend saw what I was watching. This made me, as a gay woman, feel that my own dorm roo...
- March 20, 2011
I was so surprised when you handed me this letter [from the school’s disability office, requesting accommodations]! You are so smart and so pretty!
Oh yeah, sorry, I forgot disabled people can...
- March 20, 2011
But there’s a difference between “black people” and “niggers”. You shouldn’t deny that until you’ve been to the South and have seen the difference.
Young wh...
- March 19, 2011
Men can’t be raped. If you’re a man you consent by default.
Made me feel isolated....
- March 19, 2011
But still, you’re so skinny! I wish I had your metabolism!
Multiple female friends on multiple occasions, after I’ve explained that my body is a mess after fighting off an eating disorde...
- March 19, 2011
So, are you a lesbian because you are plus sized, or because some man treated you wrong?
A man I’d just met to me outside a bar in response to one of the (many) reasons I would not sleep with ...
- March 18, 2011
Who needs skin-colored paint? Ok. Now who needs paint that isn’t skin-colored, like purple or brown?
Middle school art teacher, passing out paint for an art project. Made me feel shocked, isol...
- March 18, 2011
I am driving my friend home. He asks me to “put some black people music on” and grabs my iPhone to search for songs. I have hundreds of songs to choose from that are written, produced,...
- March 18, 2011
How can you go so long without having sex?! You’re a BLACK GUY.
My coworker to me after it came out that I hadn’t had a girlfriend for a while. He’s a white male, and as I stood th...
- March 17, 2011
When #waystopissoffafatperson was trending on Twitter. I just feel sick....
- March 17, 2011
I roll down my window to ask for directions in a white neighborhood. The white jogger I ask just gives me a mean stare. He doesn’t offer directions, he doesn’t say he doesn’t know th...
- March 17, 2011
They said she dressed older than her age, wearing makeup and fashions more appropriate to a woman in her 20s. She would hang out with teenage boys at a playground, some said.
New York Times about th...
- March 17, 2011
They hit a state trooper head on. And they were both illegals. Well, I don’t know if they were illegals, but they had illegal sounding names.
My mother explaining to my father something she ha...
- March 17, 2011
Link: re/write:: thoughts on a. wallace & asian am response
Some insightful points about the response to the “Asians in the Library” Youtube video....
- March 16, 2011
People call me “fobby” when they find out I received an education before high school in an Asian country. When I make a grammatical mistake, pronounce something wrong or with an accent, or...
- March 16, 2011
Where do you think you’re going?
Spoken to me, a young black man, as I went to board my train in first class. Two white gentlemen boarded before me and the attendant said nothing and made no a...
- March 16, 2011
The many Facebook statuses after the 2011 tsunami. Made me feel sick, crushed, and ashamed of America. (Click the image to enlarge.)...
- March 16, 2011
You’re the only girl here. We could take you off somewhere and rape you.
I was having drinks with three male friends, late 2010. Made me feel more sad than anything, because I actually though...
- March 16, 2011
Youtube: “Asians in the Library” | Only because about 10 of you sent this in to us. It (more than) borders on macroaggressive. Does the fact that it went viral m...
- March 16, 2011
“I AM NOT YOUR AVERAGE GIRL” ...
- March 15, 2011
I’m watching a news clip about the death of a transgender woman in Arkansas. She was shot and dragged along the road by a car in what some believe to be a transphobic attack. Even though she was “...
- March 15, 2011
Forever 21, “Indian Chief Ring”...
- March 15, 2011
The kids in my class played Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles on the playground at recess. No matter how many of us there were, I was never allowed to be a Turtle. They always made me be April. We were ...
- March 14, 2011
Sorry, beautiful.
A 14 year-old boy in class to a teacher in her late 20s, patronizingly and without realising how moronic and sexist his comment was. When she told him how serious it was, he shrugg...
- March 14, 2011
...
- March 14, 2011
After learning of the earthquake and tsunami in Japan, my class was watching videos of the coverage. I have two friends in Yokohama I was worried about. My classmates made jokes about Japanese people,...
- March 14, 2011
A Chinese friend of mine said people have been approaching her on the street, telling her how sorry they are about the earthquake....
- March 14, 2011
I’m at the doctor’s office. My name is Jane and I am Asian (I have an Asian last name). I heard them call the next appointment and all I heard was the long “a” in the name, and...
- March 13, 2011
Personally, I think I was right to be outraged when my friend’s boyfriend said, and I quote, “It’s not rape if you enjoy it.” Tried to explain my point of view to friends. Th...
- March 13, 2011
I’m glad you’re over your angry feminist phase. You used to be really abrasive with it.
My ex-boyfriend. Made me feel like a really angry feminist....
- March 13, 2011
Why does this matter? Why do we HAVE TO do that?
Asked by a white girl in my intro economics class when our professor showed us breakdowns of unemployment rates by race and gender and asked us why i...
- March 13, 2011
...
- March 13, 2011
...
- March 13, 2011
My professor mentioned that his mentor at university made female students sleep with him or he wouldn’t let them in the class. He laughed. Everyone laughed. I was horrified....
- March 12, 2011
What, aren’t you a modern, empowered woman? Pssh. These women are only unempowered when they don’t feel like doing something.
Male coworker when I cheerfully asked, “Who wants to take care of ...
- March 12, 2011
...
- March 12, 2011
I work as a diversity affairs educator on a college campus. Whenever I talk about the negative experiences of students of color on campus, they are often ignored, justified, explained away or glossed ...
- March 12, 2011
We don’t need to go into your therapy sessions.
My professor when I tried to correct my class’s gross misconceptions about psychotherapy by sharing my personal experience. I felt silence...
- March 11, 2011
If you keep getting fatter, men won’t want to date you when you get older.
My dad, to me, circa 7 years old, a few months after he and mom split due to his 7+ affairs. Made me feel sad, fat, u...
- March 11, 2011
Don’t worry, you’re not alone. I’ve got a butt-buddy right here for you.
My roommate to his friend who denied being gay, referring to me, a gay male....
- March 10, 2011
I’ve got no problem with blacks, I just don’t want to live with any.
Friend of a friend defending her living requirements for next term. Made me feel angry, confused....
- March 10, 2011
Maxim Magazine, November 2003.
thefeministhub:
Well, two things jump to my mind when I see this which is 1) where is the corresponding Cosmo article on how to ...
- March 10, 2011
I go to the health center on campus to get my health physical required for students who are studying abroad. While the older, white nurse prepares the x-ray machines, she asks me where I’m going to ...
- March 9, 2011
nehrujackets:
OH HELL NAW
...
- March 9, 2011
I’m having lunch with a few classmates. One of them: “I have nothing against homosexuals but when I will be a mother, if my children are I would be disappointed and just won’t acce...
- March 9, 2011
I hate it when random non-Black Yalies ask me absurd questions about ‘blackness’: my hair, can you show me this dance, my skin-AAAH! Yale has one of the greatest Af-Am departments in the w...
- March 9, 2011
“Walking Home”, A Third World Newsreel Workshop Production in collaboration with Messages in Motion, directed by Nuala Cabral ...
- March 9, 2011
I think anyone who is white and identifies as Maori [indigenous New Zealander] is just trying to rob the Government and University of money.
My boyfriend’s flatmate, talking about scholarships...
- March 9, 2011
Oh, you mean you’re Chinese, right?
Almost every time someone asks me “What are you?” and I respond “Taiwanese American,” they feel the need to correct my response. Yes...
- March 8, 2011
Oh and I ran into Zach. He was so flaming. Like, super gay. I don’t know, the guys were like, ‘okay…’ It was really bad.
My best friend in college talking about running into...
- March 8, 2011
“I find it rather funny when girls who wear rather revealing clothing complain about being touched inappropriately. It’s like walking around with expensive jewelry and getting robbed, the...
- March 8, 2011
This is my best female mechanic.
My boss introduces me this way repeatedly to everyone, even after I have told him how it is a backhanded compliment. He laughs and says I am too easily offended. ...
- March 8, 2011
See, it is just natural that boys like cars & trucks and girls like dolls.
My mother-in-law commented as my 2 year old son and his 3 year old cousin played with toys. She didn’t notice tha...
- March 8, 2011
When people assume I, a woman of color, am not a law student - especially when I’m in the law library, or with male law students representing our school. I am 23 in Toronto, and it makes me feel...
- March 7, 2011
We don’t have any women’s shirts left. Everyone must have bought them for their wives.
Man selling t-shirts at a team meeting for scientists working on a NASA mission. I was one of only ...
- March 7, 2011
It’s like pornography; you know it when you see it.
Senior NASA official at a scientist team meeting for the mission I work on. We were having a group discussion about what makes a scientific ...
- March 7, 2011
Link: A Day In The Life Of An Angry Transsexual
Dealing with microaggression is a bit like standing in a hail storm. Though each individual pellet of ice may sting, no single one on its own can d...
- March 7, 2011
He doesn’t look like he has Tourette’s.
My dad while watching American Idol, about a contestant who was autistic with Tourette’s Syndrome. This is not the first time he has armchai...
- March 6, 2011
My friend views Japanese men and gay men as her entertainment. When we go out in public she squeals loudly and points if there is a gay couple walking by. More than once she has tried to drag me with ...
- March 6, 2011
That’s why black men, like my boyfriend, date us white women. They like REAL hair, real nails, and none of that attitude. Black girls are way too ghetto and too much work.
At work during lunc...
- March 6, 2011
Well you know, you are going to have to deal with some uneducatable black kids.
My family member in response to the fact that I am an applicant for Teach for America. (“Uneducatable” is ...
- March 6, 2011
I wish you’d stop calling me a feminist. I’m not a feminist. It’s really insulting. I love all that traditional woman stuff, cooking, cleaning, like that.
...
- March 6, 2011
We need 3-4 men to help us carry these boxes.
Makes me feel ignored....
- March 5, 2011
Thank you, Sir.
To me, a woman, from the salesperson at a convenience store. This happens to me all the time. I am a cis woman, in my 60’s, with a short haircut and no makeup, often wearing ge...
- March 5, 2011
I wish my son would dump the girl he’s dating…she’s bipolar! You know how those people are.
Overheard conversation between two faculty members at my university. I’m a woman l...
- March 5, 2011
yo u ‘minorities’ have to stop complain. “oh if this was a black guy, the comments and headline would read scum.” stfu honestly, they rnt praising him for stabbing ppl u idiot...
- March 5, 2011
Do you have a man? Write back!
A note left on my desk in my office. Made me feel insecure, flabbergasted....
- March 4, 2011
I know it’s for girls, but it’s actually really good!
Male co-worker trying to get me, a female, to watch a TV show he likes and having no clue that he’s insulting me right to my f...
- March 4, 2011
My fiance and I just moved to the Tennessee. All our new neighbors, when they introduce themselves, ask him what he does for a living. None of them ask me. I support us both. Made me feel angry, unimp...
- March 4, 2011
Blaine is NOT bi. He is gay, and will always be gay. I think it’s very important to young kids that they know this character is one of them.
Ryan Murphy, on the Glee character Blaine....
- March 4, 2011
I own a home. Whenever my boyfriend accompanies me to the hardware store, the clerks address all the comments to him, even if I’m the one answering all the questions. In Nashville, 2010 & ma...
- March 4, 2011
The delivery person from a specialized pharmacy came to my door to deliver my month’s worth of medical supplies for an invisible disability. As I open the door, the delivery person says “S...
- March 3, 2011
My (thin and attractive) ex-boyfriend and I (fat) used to go out to eat a lot. He would always order a water and I would always order a soda. Guess who the server would always give the water to? Hum...
- March 3, 2011
You should be a fashion major.
A 40ish white man to me, a female college student. It made me feel as though my only worth is in my appearance. ...
- March 3, 2011
How long have you been in Canada for?
The question a man asked me when I moved away from the back door and told him to go ahead when the bus was still moving. I’m a Black Muslim girl wearing hijab...
- March 3, 2011
I’m fine with gays, and I’m fine with lesbians, but it’s the people who can’t decide that bother me. Like, the ones who can’t decide which ones they like more, or what ge...
- March 3, 2011
If the Japs are offended, then screw them. They should have stayed away from Pearl Harbor.”
The highest rated comment on a very old and very racist Bugs Bunny cartoon shown on YouTube....
- March 2, 2011
Ah, now, there’s the Asian in you.
My fourth grade teacher remarks (I was 10 years old) when I showed her my carefully rendered drawing of me playing soccer. I’m White-Asian/Asian-White ...
- March 2, 2011
“In honor of Black History Month”, my school’s broadcast team decided to rap the video announcements....
- March 2, 2011
Every time at Christmas when I watch my younger brother open up the present I wanted but will never receive because it’s considered too “boyish.”...
- March 2, 2011
I’m so impressed - I can’t hear any accent when you talk!
Client (white, mid 50s), to me (Hispanic, mid 20s)...
- March 1, 2011
Look at her ass!
Said by some high school boys as a girl walked down the hallway, next to my locker. My brother, standing beside me, asked me not to say anything - he’s friends with some of th...
- March 1, 2011
No, no, I’m looking for a book for a little GIRL.
Regularly, at the bookstore where I work, when I suggest books that don’t have cartoon princesses or disembodied midriffs on the cover....
- March 1, 2011
I don’t think this is “adultist”. I work with teens. They don’t know shit. That’s why people like me are paid with work with them” and “Adultist isn’t a...
- March 1, 2011
I’m walking down my school hallway and two white guys I’ve never met walking past me yell out, “Whoo hoo. Yeah, dark chocolate.” at me. Happened yesterday in high school and ma...
- March 1, 2011
No offense, but honestly, I don’t think of you as Asian.
A white dorm hall-mate that I had been studying with. I look “Asian” but am fifth generation US-born. I felt conspicuous, i...
- April 30, 2011
You don’t look Jewish.
...
- April 30, 2011
I walk into the ninth grade English classroom with a short haircut, the day before I had cut off my braids. The teacher looks me up and down and says, “Good morning, butch.”
Freshman year...
- April 30, 2011
I meet the spouse of a friend, who launches into recycling the racist jokes he’s told at his workplace. He insists that his black and Puerto Rican coworkers think he’s a cutup, and canR...
- April 30, 2011
Being too afraid to say something when a man harasses me and other women at the bus stop. I get on the bus and leave them with him.
Made me feel ashamed, impotent, angry....
- April 30, 2011
Yeah, well, you can bet HE won’t have to pay to go to good college.
Overheard during ceremony when student with Arabic name received an award....
- April 29, 2011
My classmate makes a joke about Jews running the media. We all laugh, including me, because they think there are no Jews around to hear it. Made me feel humiliated....
- April 29, 2011
Fellow men who paternalistically refer to women (who are around their age, or even older) as “girls.”...
- April 29, 2011
Chinaman, go home!
Said to my father and me, age 8, while walking across Union Square, San Francisco. Made me feel confused, at first; we’re Pilipino, not Chinese. Made me angry when I realize...
- April 29, 2011
Of course you like men. As a woman, it’s in your nature.
A man hitting on me after I told him I wasn’t interested, because I’m gay....
- April 29, 2011
I’m glad you changed your hair… you were starting to look like Buckwheat!
Friend, two years ago....
- April 28, 2011
Well, what are Aboriginals doing to preserve their culture? They shouldn’t be using computers then.
Response of white university student in a 3rd Year Sociology of Minority Groups course, afte...
- April 28, 2011
So do you feel more straight now?
Friends who know I’m bisexual, and had recently started dating a man after dating only women for a few years. Happened several years ago....
- April 28, 2011
...
- April 28, 2011
I’m surprised you’re not in jail right now.
Drunken words of a European white male I (African American) approached for a dance in an NYC bar. First words out of his mouth....
- April 28, 2011
Dude, I’m blacker than you. I watch Comic view on BET every night.
In response to me being from an affluent suburb with multi-generational professionals....
- April 28, 2011
We were discussing some topic in my Anthropology class, and the professor called on me by referring to me as the “aggressive, African queen in the back.” I was so shocked I looked around t...
- April 28, 2011
Are you Chinese? Then what ARE you? Because you don’t look like us.
Little white girl in the pool in Arkansas when I was 8 years old. I’m Cuban/White and look racially ambiguous. Made me...
- April 27, 2011
How come you don’t have a Chinese name like Ling Ling or something?
My mother to my Chinese American girlfriend, whose name is Sara....
- April 27, 2011
I am Asian American. When my white boyfriend revealed me to his mother (by saying and spelling my last name), she grumbled, “Well, at least she’s not black.”
I had so much internaliz...
- April 27, 2011
A paragraph we added to “About the Project”:
This project is not about showing how “ignorant” people can be and simply dismissing their ignorance. Instead, it is about showing ...
- April 27, 2011
After emailing a picture of a very hot lady to a straight friend, (I am gay) and signing off with the words “Every dyke’s dream” she told me not to use that word as it was so ‘...
- April 26, 2011
Blond child to her mother while watching brown skinned & black haired me fly a kite at the beach: “Mommy, she looks like one of the bad guys.” Over and over again, getting louder and m...
- April 26, 2011
My dad continues to use the term “Oriental” to refer to Asians. When I ask him not to, he gets angry and yells at me about “political correctness.” My (South Asian) mother tell...
- April 26, 2011
I have OCD and was stuck in the middle of a ritual. This girl looks at me trying to get out of it and says: “Oh don’t stop, it’s funny!” ...
- April 26, 2011
Your English is excellent.
I’m Indian & this happens every time I meet an American. Usually a white one....
- April 26, 2011
She’s just being extra sensitive because her husband-to-be is not an English citizen. If he is a citizen, he should not be offended.
My great-aunt’s explanation of why I was upset about...
- April 25, 2011
I keep getting freaked out whenever I look at your hands — it looks like they’re attached to a woman.
My sister commenting on my red nail polish at Thanksgiving dinner....
- April 25, 2011
The only other Asian in my grade and I were given the roles of stereotypical, lab-coat-wearing scientists in the sixth grade school play....
- April 25, 2011
You’ll fail. Why don’t you take keyboarding instead?
My high school counselor, explaining why he wouldn’t let me take computer science even though I had an A+ in all the prerequisi...
- April 25, 2011
Man outside club asks my name. I tell him. He says, “Wow, that’s so exotic.” I cannot count the number of times I have heard that....
- April 25, 2011
Your cousin is dating a new man. I don’t know what he is, but he’s something.
What happens when your white cousin dates a brown guy....
- April 25, 2011
I just think life is hard enough without being gay on top of it.
My dad, explaining to an eight-year-old me why he hopes I’m not into girls....
- April 24, 2011
Facebook status: “My instructor just said women should do all the shopping, while men do manly things. The girls in class flipped out at him. funnest thing I have ever seen in school. I’m ...
- April 24, 2011
Man, outscored by a black guy.
Vietnamese American male upon finding out I got a higher score than him on the Chinese I midterm....
- April 24, 2011
Working at an Irish pub means that you tend to chat to the customers quite a bit. I often get the “Where are you from?” question. To which I always reply, “Canada.” To which th...
- April 24, 2011
It’s not fair that my son has to compete with illegal immigrants for college admissions.
Mom at crew race....
- April 23, 2011
Hey China doll! Ni hao, ma!
Random dudes on street....
- April 23, 2011
We don’t keep eating utensils in the car. That’s what FAT FAT FAT people do.
My mom, who has food issues. She spat out the word “fat” like it hurt her to say it. Made me...
- April 23, 2011
The names black people come up with for their kids are just ridiculous. What’s with all the prefixes? “Te-shawn” and “De-andre.” Ridiculous. What’s wrong with R...
- April 23, 2011
You should just get over it and get used to it sweetie.
Mother, after I called her upset about being sexually assaulted....
- April 22, 2011
All your friends are gay. I’m worried that other people will make judgments about you, and… [lowers voice] you should be careful, because they might try to recruit you.
My mother, disapp...
- April 22, 2011
My white cousin and her Nigerian husband have an adorable 2 year-old. When my cousin is out alone with her daughter she is constantly asked by strangers where her daughter is from; people assume s...
- April 22, 2011
If you were skinny you could just mooch off of some sucker who would pay for everything.
‘Friend’ in reference to my financial problems...
- April 22, 2011
I get on a tram late one night by myself. A white man looks me up and down and then says to his friend, ”Mmm. I feel like curry tonight.”...
- April 22, 2011
Comment on this post about the roots of microaggressions where perpetrators are people of color. We wholeheartedly agree with this comment, and as editors we w...
- April 22, 2011
The menu at my college in “honor” of Black History Month. I saw this and joked to my black friends that the only thing missing on this menu is water...
- April 22, 2011
Well, you do have a nice body… it’s not really their fault.
Male best friend after I talked to him about how upset I was on being sexually harassed at my job....
- April 21, 2011
Don’t you want to get married someday?
60 year old married coworker after seeing me pick up sweets in the kitchen....
- April 21, 2011
I am a female attorney. I represented a client at a court hearing where there were five other parties, all represented by male attorneys. The judge was a male. During the hearing, the judge ordered me...
- April 21, 2011
I love my grandkids, even though they are black.
Elderly white lady, whose rebellious son married a black woman and moved to a predominantly black neighborhood....
- April 21, 2011
So?
My ex-boyfriend in college, after telling him how an acquaintance physically sexually harassed me....
- April 21, 2011
Ugh, I hate living here. There’s so many black people around.
My Vietnamese friend who lives in another town when I was visiting her....
- April 20, 2011
When I was 9 years old my school decided I was too fat and put me in special physical education classes. I had to put an exercise chart on the fridge at home. Since then I have struggled with feelings...
- April 20, 2011
Two young black men in their early 20s come to my door to sell magazine subscriptions that will “help literacy in the ghetto.” One of them tells me how hard it was for him to grow up in th...
- April 20, 2011
Are you a boy or a girl? Sit up straight!
A man at another restaurant table to a five year-old girl....
- April 20, 2011
While studying for a medical school parasitology exam about infectious diseases, a classmate says, “Why are we studying all these diseases that are only in Africa? They don’t even have any...
- April 20, 2011
See, when I think ‘ghetto’, I think names like DeShawn… you know, ethnic-sounding names. Not Allen. Allen sounds like someone who makes money.
Conversation overheard between three ...
- April 19, 2011
I stopped getting asked to babysit girls right around the time I came out as a lesbian at age 15 or 16. It could have been an age thing, but I still got other jobs in a different neighborhood watchi...
- April 19, 2011
We can’t get him that. Put it back, it’ll make him gay.
I work at a toy store. This couple was shopping for a two year old and apparently only gay boys play with farm animal toys. I fel...
- April 19, 2011
You really shouldn’t talk about that. Nobody wants to hear about it.
A high school friend, grossed out because I had written in my blog the previous night about how intense and painful my mens...
- April 19, 2011
Kids in my class are constantly complaining about people who get into college on affirmative action but brag about their legacy credits at Ivies. They say affirmative action is unfair, racist against ...
- April 19, 2011
At the zoo with my boyfriend, who just bought both of us ice cream cones. Young girl asks her father if she can have ice cream too. He smiles at me and says: ”If you’re a good girl. See, ...
- April 19, 2011
You’re beautiful. Oh, you’re married? So, do you have any sisters?
Business man to business woman, during a business dinner. I was appalled....
- April 19, 2011
Honey, you probably aren’t strong enough.
A high school cafeteria aide after I offered to give the Heimlich maneuver to a choking male student. I am a petite, 16 year-old female certified as a...
- April 18, 2011
She always wears such revealing clothing and flirts with all of these guys when we’re out. It’s just gross and dangerous. I’m not saying that a person deserves to be raped, butR...
- April 18, 2011
Not much of a man, are you?
My partner’s father, a local sheriff, berated me at his dinner table for not knowing enough about vehicle maintenance. My lack of interest in cars does not define...
- April 18, 2011
I’m signing in at the doctors, and they ask my ethnicity. I respond, “white British”, and they say, ”Good, that’s what we like to hear.”...
- April 18, 2011
Spain? France? Italy? Greece? Russia? Serbia? Czech? Oh… you are a Turk? Oh…
I am a German-born light-skinned child of Turkish immigrants. Encountered many times across Europe when peopl...
- April 18, 2011
Woah, are you two sisters? You look so much alike! It’s just that you both have that ethnic thing going on.
A white man to my friend and me. Besides having brown skin we look nothing alike. ...
- April 17, 2011
I have been hearing this quite often now and it seriously pisses me off. There are a bunch of guys I hang around with and whenever they say something that they think sounds slightly homosexual, they...
- April 17, 2011
Saw your picture in the company newsletter. WOW WOW WOW!
Male coworker commenting about my appearance. Inappropriate for a work setting, and not really a complement otherwise. This is not the first ...
- April 17, 2011
I mean, I can tell you have some black in you.
Some guy comes up to me, referring to my hair....
- April 17, 2011
Well, of course life is easy for you, you’re Malay. It’s not like you need to be smart to get a scholarship.
Colleague at work commenting on the worthiness of my university degree. Made ...
- April 17, 2011
“Gah! A Muslim with a knife! Terror!”
After (Canadian) Thanksgiving dinner with friends from my graduate studies program (whom I used to think of as my family away from home, until this ...
- April 17, 2011
(My teenaged brother) needs a man to explain this stuff to him.
When I told her that I was trying to fill that role, she asked me if I’d ever been a boy. I’m a trans guy, closeted, and I’m t...
- April 17, 2011
Riding my bike home from work, the kid next door, without looking, almost backs his car into me. I think, Hey, new driver, I’ll just point out that he should be more careful when backing out.
He s...
- April 16, 2011
It’s okay, he won’t bother you. He doesn’t like black girls.
My friend, in reference to his drunk friend hitting on every girl in the vicinity. On my Saturday night out....
- April 16, 2011
A professor asked the class if anyone knew the transmission pathway of sound to humans. I replied, “The sound waves hit the tympanic membrane which then vibrates the tiny ossciles in the middle ear ...
- April 16, 2011
I am a 19 year old genderqueer, and as long as I can remember the idea that I would develop breasts made me uncomfortable. Everytime I’ve mentioned the idea of a breast reduction I have been shot do...
- April 15, 2011
You’re so weird [insert my name here]! You’re the only other girl I know that likes video games!
My female friend at lunch the other week. Made me feel like an outcast, awkward, and not a “pro...
- April 15, 2011
I listened to a young male in a comic book store reference rape casually, and use the word faggot in a joke, and use the word retarded to describe something stupid. I later referred to something as sk...
- April 15, 2011
Bitch Media | “Microaggressions: Because it IS a Big Deal”
A post about this project! Check out their blog, too....
- April 14, 2011
In a meeting of department chairs (nearly all men), one professor disdainfully refers to “The Southwest Needlepoint Journal” (a publication he invents as an example of worthless research)....
- April 14, 2011
She thought you were wonderful and not as fat as everyone had told her.
My mother-in-law telling me what a relative I had just met thought of me. I wanted to crawl under a rock...
- April 14, 2011
Chatting light-heartedly with a friend about whether Prince William could marry a Catholic (which she is). I joked that it would be cool if he married a Hindu or a Muslim (which I am). She said, ̶...
- April 13, 2011
I was going to pay for parking at the new payment machines at my campus (which are confusing, but I had used them before). The older male construction worker asks if I’ve used them, and when I s...
- April 13, 2011
Say I wanted to categorize the people in this room into boys and girls…
Example for workshop on a programming language that my (genderqueer, trans, neither M nor F) partner was taking....
- April 13, 2011
I live in the UK and I’m tired of people yelling out “Ni hao ma!” at me on the streets. I get it, I’m Asian. I know I’m Asian. I don’t need you to yell Mandarin gre...
- April 12, 2011
My daughter said, ‘Mom, I hate Mexicans!’ I told her you can’t judge all Mexicans because of one but, you can say they are all short.
This was said by my fiance’s aunt tonigh...
- April 12, 2011
Their bill came to $65 and they left me a $1 tip. Indians!
One of my coworkers, who of course never mentions race when white people undertip her. Afterwards, I discovered our lunch special was ̶...
- April 12, 2011
Upon meeting a new [gay, cis male] member of my university’s queer organization, he asks me if I am gay. When I say yes, he responds, “I didn’t think you were a lesbian or gay at all...
- April 12, 2011
It’s terrible! And it’s not like she was doing something wrong, like walking around late at night.
My boyfriend, in response to me being upset because a woman at a coffee shop in my nei...
- April 11, 2011
My co-worker at a history textbook publishing house always whispers “historically black” when saying Historically Black College (HBCs)....
- April 11, 2011
You’re a white girl in a black girls body.
My white college roomate when she found out that I was a Classical Music major....
- April 11, 2011
Overheard my coworkers laughing and saying something about a “little Asian girl”. I wonder if that’s how they think of me....
- April 11, 2011
American Apparel jumps on the racist bandwagon with its own interpretation of the Hipster Headdress — a sacred array of $14 twist scarves? Oh, look, you can even take fifteen dollars off the entir...
- April 10, 2011
Taking my money before you give me my coffee — after doing the opposite with every other customer....
- April 10, 2011
If I had a wife like that, I’d HAVE to beat her.
A maintenance man to me, in all seriousness, about a woman he had to help out of a broken elevator who was having a panic attack about it....
- April 10, 2011
An Asian American man brings his adorable infant daughter to the reception desk. The receptionist, after exchanging pleasantries, says out of nowhere, “I hope you get a son next so you can carry...
- April 10, 2011
That’s okay, no judgment. Just, don’t tell anyone yet.
My mother after I explained to her that I am attracted to other women. Made me feel shamed, confused....
- April 9, 2011
My friend called my birthday cake gay. I told him that that was highly improbable. Because it is a cake. Made me feel momentarily annoyed, but not any less hungry....
- April 9, 2011
I am filling out a volunteer form for a local AIDS awareness agency. On one page they ask the applicant to select their “population group”, gender and language spoken at home. You can only...
- April 9, 2011
wants a gay male friend… I miss having one, gay people are so much fun! :D
A straight married woman college-aged acquaintance on Facebook. Made me feel fetishized as a gay person; invisible as...
- April 8, 2011
Your point that racism and sexism are at similar levels for me is a bit extreme… that is just what I’m saying.
My partner, a black man, to me, a black woman....
- April 8, 2011
Every time I (female) tell someone that my boyfriend moved across the country with me so that I can go to law school, they tell me that he is “so sweet” and that I “am so lucky to ha...
- April 8, 2011
Coming out as bisexual to my mother, a lesbian: “I don’t think you’re bisexual because I can’t picture you actually being with another woman. Or having a relationship with a wo...
- April 7, 2011
At Sundance, someone criticized Justin Lin for his portrayal of Asians in “Better Luck Tomorrow,” implying that it didn’t fit the stereotype of Asians as hardworking, obedient studen...
- April 7, 2011
Great-aunt: I don’t think that she should be dating a black man. It’s just not right. [turns to me] I want you to know that I’m not racist. I just want my granddaughter to end up wit...
- April 6, 2011
Hey girl! Come talk to me!
Random men on the street who feel like they can waste my time while I’m on my way to work. This happens to me almost every day in NYC. Makes me feel objectified....
- April 6, 2011
I’m not gay, but I’ll sometimes, you know, flirt with other girls or pretend to make out with them because that’s funny.
A classmate of mine. We are both cis women; she doesn’...
- April 5, 2011
That’s a girl’s toy.
My boyfriend’s cousin to her sister’s 17-month-old son. Made me feel sad & annoyed....
- April 5, 2011
You could pass for Dominican; some of them are really dark and have bad hair like you. Luckily, I got the GOOD hair”.
Said to me by the black Dominican-American boyfriend of my biracial (black...
- April 5, 2011
I think it’s mean to tell someone they’re going to hell. I mean, I believe that men and women were made for each other, but my roommate’s a lesbian, and I don’t tell her I thin...
- April 4, 2011
I’m 100% supportive of my daughter’s choice of an alternative lifestyle!
Random 40-something straight cis-female, online, trying to be progressive about queer issues. Furious and margin...
- April 4, 2011
“Ask your grandparents about Nixon…” and
“When your parents were in school, they heard about [insert US policy] daily.”
At school, by different teachers. Makes me feel fr...
- April 4, 2011
I would never, ever hire someone with a “black” name on their resume. I wouldn’t even interview them.
An African American co-worker at a team dinner. ...
- April 4, 2011
My parents say they’ll love me even if I turn out to be a lesbian. I’m bisexual, I’ve told them. Every time I take a guy home, they’re relieved. When I date a girl, they accuse...
- April 3, 2011
Don’t you think it would be better if gay people adopted the older kids that nobody else wants, leaving the babies for normal people?
...
- April 3, 2011
Ad presumably targeting computer programmers on the red line of the Boston subway system, which connects Boston to Harvard and MIT. The picture is a bit blurr...
- April 3, 2011
I’m assigned to a counselor to match scholarships to my interests. We go through applications one by one, and she hesitates at a gay and lesbian scholarship, finally skipping to the next application...
- April 3, 2011
He was pretty dark, so he’s probably not paying rent because he’s an illegal and doesn’t know English.
My (white) stepfather regarding one of his renters. Made me ashamed because I...
- April 2, 2011
I support racial profiling one hundred percent. I mean - let’s be serious here - how many white terrorists do you see?
Said to me, a person of Southeast Asian heritage who experiences the effe...
- April 2, 2011
On a school camping trip, the was a mix up and someone brought a two man tent along. I ended up up sharing it with another guy in my group. He is gay, and I am bi. All the other guys started making jo...
- April 1, 2011
The Simpsons makes a skit about Precious....
- April 1, 2011
In 3rd grade, when asked what I wanted to be when I grew up, I said President. My teacher said “You’ll never be President, you’re a girl.” At the time I didn’t realize ho...
- April 1, 2011
microprogressions:
My university is holding a fashion show. There are no weight requirements to enter, and the program’s goal is to discourage fat shaming. At the registration table, there is a mir...
- April 1, 2011
You know why Vermont is so safe, don’t you? There’s hardly any minorities in it!
I was in NY yesterday, meeting my future in-laws for the first time when my fiance’s father said th...
- April 1, 2011
Years ago I used the word ‘nigga’ as part of a greeting and generally hated feminism. Bonus: I’m white and female. I just want to apologize for everyone who put up with me while I ...
- May 31, 2011
Did you guys win the lottery or something? Living the high life!
White female neighbour and family friend to my mom and dad. She had come over for a visit, and didn’t know that we had remodele...
- May 30, 2011
When I was growing up, I was not allowed to take cooking classes. My sister, however, was in cooking classes for over eight years. My mom told me I would meet a nice woman when I grew up to cook and c...
- May 30, 2011
At work today I saw Elton John and his parter on the cover of some magazine. I saw their new baby and said, “Aww what a cute baby!” My co-worker said, “Poor baby, I feel sorry for h...
- May 30, 2011
Ya, but it’s not like a real disability.
Boyfriend, 20, texting me after I explained my tendonitis....
- May 30, 2011
It’s okay, I have gay friends.
An acquaintance after he said, “That’s so gay!” It’s not okay....
- May 30, 2011
Questions to my tomboy-femme partner and I about our family. We are a lesbian couple in Buffalo, NY and this happens every time we go out.
“So… which one had the baby?” “How di...
- May 29, 2011
You don’t want to be a professor; you want to have kids.
My academic adviser in college...
- May 29, 2011
I don’t understand bisexuals. Why can’t they just pick a side?
My mother to me. She doesn’t know I’m bi and now I know for certain I can never come out. Made me sad and angr...
- May 29, 2011
No, ma’am. He’s a decent family man, citizen that I just happen to have disagreements with on fundamental issues and that’s what this campaign’s all about. He’s not [an A...
- May 29, 2011
I don’t hate them, just keep them away from me.
A male classmate (15 years old) during class after a discussion of LGBT rights....
- May 29, 2011
Jennifer Ringer, as the Sugar Plum Fairy, looked as if she’d eaten one sugar plum too many.
New York Times review of New York City Ballet’s Nutcracker production last winter....
- May 28, 2011
I don’t wear Colombian Pride bracelets or drape Colombian flags over myself. You know, I have mostly white friends, and it’s not like I’m gonna wear hoop earrings and show my ass off...
- May 28, 2011
Lesbians and bi girls are different. Yeah, I guess it’s kind of because they’re hot.
A boy I was talking to, who knew I was a questioning woman. Made me feel angry, bitter, defensive, ob...
- May 27, 2011
While telling a well-known writer my positive but conflicted feelings about his speech, he converses but is rather brusque and when someone he knows comes by he PATS ME ON THE HEAD and starts talking ...
- May 27, 2011
In written correspondence, my husband’s family likes to call me Mrs. HisLastName and refer to our fetus as Baby HisLastName. They should know by now that I didn’t change my name, and wil...
- May 27, 2011
Why can’t you act like a normal person? You don’t have Asperger’s. There’s nothing wrong with you. You’re just looking for attention/excuses. If you’d just stop be...
- May 27, 2011
On the train, two girls in the seats opposite ours whispering about my girlfriend and me: “Oh, look how cute, lesbians!”
Made me feel angry at being talked about like a cute little animal,...
- May 27, 2011
When I asked my partner’s sister to please stop using “gay” as a way to insult people or say that something is bad, she replied “Lighten up, I have gay friends too.”...
- May 27, 2011
I travel frequently as part of my job coordinating a nationwide program. On a recent flight, the flight attendant offered beverages to every other person within my earshot by saying, “To drink, ...
- May 26, 2011
Having to constantly think of how my actions are perceived to others to make sure I seem as non-threatening as I possibly can be. No raising my voice, always pleasant, and acting as if I have to be th...
- May 26, 2011
The people I feel most sorry for in America are white men. They can’t do or say ANYTHING without someone getting upset.
A friend, after I scoffed at a white man on the radio saying that people...
- May 26, 2011
What? But you’re Asian, you’re supposed to be smart!
A friend after I mentioned that I never got the hang of AP Calculus in high school and didn’t pass the exams....
- May 26, 2011
If you don’t like it, you can return it. I just knew that they had a Japanese-type scent and thought of you.
My boyfriend’s best friend about his Christmas gift to me, a Bath & Body ...
- May 26, 2011
Oh my god, you’re using a cane! What happened?!?
I’m 20 and mostly interact with other university-age students, but I get this from employers and other people too. This is overwhelming a...
- May 26, 2011
My friends keep implying that I’m a moocher because I have to wait until payday to pay them back for food/booze/etc. Sorry I’m living paycheck to paycheck. I always pay them back. In colle...
- May 25, 2011
Don’t be afraid to be direct with me. I have nothing against strong, independent women. On the contrary, I find them attractive.
My boss, in response to me saying that sometimes I don’t ...
- May 25, 2011
Bounce, shine, and softness are the key to sexy hair.
Read in February 2011 Cosmopolitan magazine. Disgusted that American society claims to be “post-racist” and yet can’t even ack...
- May 25, 2011
I feel so bad for you. Your hair will always look like a bad perm.
My white aunt while touching my afro. I was 17 at home....
- May 24, 2011
Well, her boyfriend’s all over our records. If she got involved with him in the first place, she got what was coming to her.
Police officer about a woman who lived with an abusive partner....
- May 24, 2011
Eh, but that’s not even racist.
A white boy in history, after our teacher told us about Native American history and explained the racism of pioneers....
- May 24, 2011
They (Native people) need to stop being so difficult and complaining! They already get so much from our tax money, what more do they want?
Social studies classmate discussing the plight of various N...
- May 24, 2011
...
- May 24, 2011
Oh, I would never date a bisexual. I’d always worry they would cheat on me with a guy. Plus, they aren’t seriously gay, they are just pretending to be because it’s ‘hip.’...
- May 24, 2011
This is a flat out aggression. Published by Psychology Today, written by a Japanese man....
- May 24, 2011
I know my girls were raised sheltered and only around white people, and if I had to do it again, I would.
Said by a 44 yr old white woman to my sister, who is Latina. She was seated with my white br...
- May 23, 2011
Well, at least he’s not a laborer.
My white mom, after asking me what my white boss’ black husband did for a living....
- May 23, 2011
You can’t be a high school teacher. You’re too pretty, so the boys won’t respect you.
My now-ex, during the time when we were breaking up and I was considering getting a teaching d...
- May 23, 2011
America has a white majority, and a far larger one in most of the country’s past, so why wouldn’t the American Girls [dolls] have one as well?
As justification for a lack of characters o...
- May 23, 2011
My friend emails me excitedly; she’s met this girl she wants to hook me up with, we’re soulmates. A little prodding reveals that we have nothing in common - the only reason she thinks we&#...
- May 23, 2011
When I am six, my aunt only allows my sisters to play with her dolls. When I am fourteen my mother sends me outside to work with my father, leaving my little sister to take care of the babies. Now peo...
- May 23, 2011
Where are you parked?
Every day in class & I don’t have a car. Makes me feel annoyed, poor, angry....
- May 22, 2011
Y’all are pretty for some black girls!
A group of drunk white boys called out to me, my sister and friends. Apparently, black girls aren’t pretty. Outside a local restaurant in Savannah ...
- May 22, 2011
Older relative speaking about a member of our family who is bi-racial: ”She’s so pretty she could pass for white.” and ”Just so you know, she’s not illegitimate, she...
- May 22, 2011
How is your recovery going?
I was born with only one hand… and I get stuff like this all the time!...
- May 22, 2011
You realise she was complimenting you, right? You get offended too easily.
Friend’s response to me experiencing something along the lines of this microaggression....
- May 21, 2011
So, is it true what they say about Asians?
Many people when they find out my boyfriend is Chinese....
- May 21, 2011
You’re not what I expected.
Always meant as a compliment, from adolescence through adulthood, whenever someone meets me in person having known my race, name, or background before....
- May 21, 2011
My art school teacher requested we work on a canvas of 7ft x 6ft. I live over an hour away from campus, have to take public transportation, know no one with a car, and my home is not large enough for ...
- May 21, 2011
My supervisor and I are eating lunch together and making small talk. We work outside of a small town and I live/study most of the year in a fairly large city. When talking about the city I live in, my...
- May 21, 2011
The only reason women make up more of the rape statistics than men is because men are less likely to make a big deal about it.
Man who works in the same building as me. This made me feel fairly naus...
- May 21, 2011
When have you ever seen a monster with blue eyes?
Woman working in a yarn store where I was shopping. She was making kits for little kids to make toy monsters. I was the only person of color there, ...
- May 20, 2011
Is that about supporting illegals? Who here is an illegal?
A regular customer at my coffee shop, reacting to a sign with the American flag and the word “Justicia.”...
- May 20, 2011
One of my good friends from high school is black, but I don’t really think of her as black because she told me she’s white on the inside.
My college roommate....
- May 20, 2011
What are you doing here?
White woman, with a smile as I took a water break from riding my bike in a nice neighborhood park. It became clear through her body language and tone that to her, it was fun...
- May 20, 2011
Well, it’s probably the Asian part of you. Asian people are always so modest.
Some guy I had sex with on why I was modest about my appearance....
- May 20, 2011
This IS GAY. Everyone in the class is doing as badly as me!
My friend, less than ten minutes after we BOTH complained about people using “gay” as a derogatory adjective....
- May 19, 2011
So how much Indian ARE you? I mean, you don’t look it.
More than half the times I tell a stranger I’m Native....
- May 19, 2011
A college student, huh? So, nursing or teaching?
An older customer, trying to make small talk with me as I ring up his order....
- May 19, 2011
We’re paying full fees for our daughter to go to school, and they still ask us to donate our time! And I just think, why not ask these families on financial aid who are only paying a couple thou...
- May 19, 2011
Subscribe | If you’d like to read these microanecdotes in your inbox, sign up for our newsletter here! You will get all the latest posts, as well as news about our blog, community events and mo...
- May 18, 2011
One day I will invite you to my place you’ll like it, it’s decorated Mexican.
My advisor to me, a Mexican American, and I don’t consider my house decorations “Mexican” ...
- May 18, 2011
A woman at the DMV counter throws a form at my son, barks some instructions and calls ‘next.’ He is nervous for his first road test and doesn’t catch the instructions. When he poli...
- May 18, 2011
I mean, they’re Asian. They’ll leave little notes and chocolates.
My roommate reasoning why her friends will be good house guests while staying at our apartment. She’s a graduate s...
- May 17, 2011
She’s Indian or Muslim or something. They just wait for their husbands to tell them it’s time to have a baby and then they get pregnant. It’s sad.
Said by a friend of a friend (we&...
- May 17, 2011
You need to move to a safer a neighborhood.
My mother-in-law, after eyeing a car containing two African-American men going down my street....
- May 17, 2011
Before you meet your new coworker, I should warn you: she’s lesbian. That’s why she dresses like a man.
My boss....
- May 16, 2011
You have such nice hair, not like most Blacks! Are you half white?
Random older white female passerby....
- May 16, 2011
I’m not prejudiced, but when I hear about some crimes on the news, I just know it’s going to be a Mexican.
...
- May 16, 2011
Everything we read in this class is so outdated, all this stuff about men dominating women. Why don’t we talk about current issues?
Classmate to professor, during a discussion of some fairly ...
- May 16, 2011
Maybe she was a mail order bride.
White psychologist speculating about an female Asian client with a white husband. Australia, September 2010....
- May 15, 2011
I wish I could fix your son for you.
From someone who was looking at my autistic son playing and who obviously thought that autistic was a “bad” or “deficient” way to be. Mad...
- May 15, 2011
This new piece is a little different. It’s by a female composer so we’ll see what happens. It’s dedicated to all of the females in the orchestra.
Male orchestra conductor, mentione...
- May 15, 2011
Oh, you are Native American? You don’t look native, are you sure?
Classmate in my 4th year of college....
- May 15, 2011
You might have trouble finding participants for that study.
Teacher about my proposed research subject about the experiences of gender non-conforming folks with medical and mental health services. M...
- May 15, 2011
You’re actually smart. You hardly have an accent. Good for you.
Said with relief by the enrollment counselor at my new high school after looking at my transcript....
- May 14, 2011
My so-called liberal arts college didn’t accept my transfer credit for a pre-1750 history class that was more Afrocentric & focused on Asia instead of Europe. Why teach equality if we don...
- May 14, 2011
Looking at an assortment of teas in a box: “Plantation Mint” and “Oriental Green Tea” are among the offerings. Today, made me feel like I was living in a colonized world - whic...
- May 14, 2011
This is why we get along! You totally get my f’d-up sense of humor. Like, I always think about this list of objects that would be perfect”—looks around and lowers her voice— &#...
- May 14, 2011
I don’t want to worry you, but something is wrong with her eyes.
The doctor who delivered me to my white mother. When he saw my Asian father he was all “OH, nevermind.”...
- May 14, 2011
Reporters from my school newspaper call me every time a story comes up involving queer issues. As if I’m the only queer person on campus....
- May 14, 2011
Go back to China.
A stranger on the bus....
- May 13, 2011
My class (13 girls of color) and I (white woman) walk to visit a school up the street in an affluent neighborhood, and the students are nearly all white. Two parents inside the building start singing,...
- May 13, 2011
An old friend IMs me asking me to fill out a survey for his statistics class. It’s about “who should pay on a first date,” and the options are “Male, Female, Split, Whoever ask...
- May 13, 2011
I mean it’s true, girls just find something wrong in everything and make it all about them when it’s not. How are we supposed to prove that we aren’t the bad guys when they can never...
- May 13, 2011
I know what I just said sounds prejudiced, but I’m really not.
My coworker, putting his hand on my arm after he suggested that only black people would vote for Obama because he’s black, ...
- May 13, 2011
Boys don’t wear necklaces like that.
My mother...
- May 13, 2011
Interview with Ms. Magazine | It’s up! Check it out. Shoutout to the Ms. Blog and the wonderful blogging they do!...
- May 13, 2011
no fats no fems
m4m craigslist personals (everywhere)...
- May 12, 2011
Question we received in response to this post:
What suggestions do you guys have for dealing with this ‘ignorance’? It upsets me, bothers me, yet people continually respond with “It...
- May 12, 2011
Everyone in Afghanistan and Iraq knows how to make road side bombs. They learn from their fathers and uncles. Monkey see, monkey do!
My science teacher, while digressing from a lecture about explosi...
- May 12, 2011
Native Americans have to stop being so whiney. Geronimo wasn’t describing Bin Laden, it’s just a word. People have to stop being so sensitive and just get over it.
My 10th grade History ...
- May 12, 2011
I shouldn’t step outside in my turban; people might think I’m a terrorist.
My mother (a white woman), having just dressed after a shower, with her wet hair wrapped in a bath towel, speak...
- May 12, 2011
...
- May 12, 2011
You may be a person of color, but you’re not black. What right do you have to tell me about racism? I mean, you’re mixed, so you’re half white!
A white, middle class childhood frie...
- May 11, 2011
Well, she’s Puerto Rican, but she doesn’t come off as Latina. She comes off more, like, business, you know?
Twenty-something white man on his cell phone....
- May 11, 2011
You’re so much less man-hating than I expected a [women’s college] lesbian to be!
...
- May 11, 2011
The project is looking for some savvy coders for a site redesign to make it more accessible! If you (or someone you know) know anything about html/css/tumblr layouts/etc, shoot email us at editors@m...
- May 10, 2011
I don’t think it would be fair to my other students if I let you have special treatment.
A TA in my college class, about my physical disability (which I have accommodations for)....
- May 10, 2011
I mean you’re white, you really have nothing to complain about.
Said by a white, straight, man to a queer, light-skinned, mixed-race persyn who was talking about problems faced by queer people...
- May 10, 2011
So are you gay or not? You can’t be “pretty gay”. At the end of the day, bisexuals are usually actually homosexuals.
A piece of advice in a LGBTQ magazine for a bi woman afraid she...
- May 10, 2011
Come on, you just need to meet the right guy to get you loosened up.
A guy at a bar, upon learning I was asexual....
- May 10, 2011
Marry someone with a name like Smith, so you can still have a weird first name but with a last name people can actually pronounce. It’s better for your kids that way, too.
A competitor in a sp...
- May 10, 2011
While staying with a friend in London, his cousin drops by for dinner. We turn on a show that’s sort of a line-up of stand-up comedians. (So far, all white men.) A black woman walks on stage. Fr...
- May 10, 2011
The White interns complained that they were feeling left out.
Response given by White training director in health care setting when I (person of color) asked why the supervision group for students o...
- May 9, 2011
A friend is trying to describe to me as a dumb loudmouth says that I am a “mix between a southern hick and a New York Jew.”...
- May 9, 2011
What do you mean, you’re a Christian? You’re a lesbian! That’s just masochistic!
A straight, agnostic classmate. I felt alienated and invalidated....
- May 9, 2011
What are you?
In reference to my race and heard from many people since I was in grammar school. I’ve often wondered about their motivations. Is it that if they don’t immediately recogniz...
- May 8, 2011
Everyone assuming the only other Asian student in my high school and I are cousins....
- May 8, 2011
You’re dark, that’s the worst time to make a first impression.
My fair-skinned mother on meeting my boyfriend’s family with a slight tan. I am 21 and was at home....
- May 8, 2011
In fifth grade while studying WWII, the kid sitting next to me says, “I hate the Japanese.” Turning to me, he adds, “no offense!” I am Filipina, and my great grandparents d...
- May 8, 2011
Anyway, [the teacher] says if you’re not black or Latin@, the standards are higher. I’m so jealous of [biracial girl]; she gets to put ‘black,’ but she still looks white.
...
- May 7, 2011
I’m just not attracted to black or Hispanic girls.
My boyfriend, today....
- May 7, 2011
While at the Golden State Warrior’s game last week, I watched Jeremy Lin, the first Asian American, play at the end of the 2nd quarter. The white man sitting next to me proceeds to shout ̶...
- May 7, 2011
Old white woman in elevator turns to me and says, “It’s hot, isn’t it?” I reply, “Yes, it’s unbearable”. She than asks me, “Well, aren’t your people used to this type of weather?...
- May 7, 2011
There don’t seem to be many American students there.
My step-grandmother in North Carolina, looking at photos of me and my mostly-Asian American group of friends from University of Hawaii....
- May 6, 2011
After reviewing a proposal from a caterer for a Chinese themed party. I tell my boss that some aspects of it seemed “hokey” and slightly offensive. My boss says “But, its for old whi...
- May 6, 2011
Note on submissions - THANK YOU for all of your contributions so far to The Microaggressions Project! We’ve gotten many questions about submissions not being posted yet!
Just so you know, weR...
- May 5, 2011
...
- May 5, 2011
My friend Kelly; she’s black, but she’s really smart.
Fellow college student in a very diverse university....
- May 5, 2011
Now which one of you is the real mom?
Often said to my same-sex partner and I who have two children together, (ages 7 and 10). I’m 45 and live in a “liberal” pocket of western Mass...
- May 5, 2011
I am one of two women at my service-oriented job. Older clients often complain that my coworker’s style isn’t feminine enough and that she shouldn’t always wear her hair slicked back...
- May 5, 2011
My step-mom was giving away kittens and had spoken to a woman earlier on the phone about adopting one. She told me she knew the woman adopting was Black because of how she sounded on the phone. La...
- May 5, 2011
Why do they keep talking about Katrina? It was five years ago!
My father...
- May 4, 2011
I’m allowed to use that word any way I want to! I have a nephew like that and I grew up with cousins and classmates who were that way.
My mother, after I asked her not to call high prices for ...
- May 4, 2011
A girl is leaving to visit a mosque as part of a seminar. Two guys start talking about it: “What kind of seminar is it? Religion…?” “Arabic religion, I think. She hates it.R...
- May 4, 2011
You’re so white… you’re so not a black girl. I don’t understand why you get upset when I say this… You don’t “act black.
From certain white friends. Makes m...
- May 4, 2011
While I’m standing at the front of the room teaching the class, an older white male professor comes in with two male TA’s and starts moving around tables for the next class ten minutes bef...
- May 4, 2011
She’s just trying to have her Kobe Bryant moment.
A female co-worker, in regards to a sexual assault case at my university. I was shocked & angry....
- May 4, 2011
Link: Bin Laden code name "Geronimo"
Maybe more macro than micro, but contains an underlying message - this article from Indian Country Today breaks it down....
- May 4, 2011
Well you have to understand that those people are from a different generation so you can’t get upset. If they tell you that your hair is festive it’s not meant to be a bad thing, you know...
- May 3, 2011
I want to steal a black baby. Black babies are just so much cuter than white babies!
At work, by a white administrator, after a mother came in for a conference & brought her little daughter. Ma...
- May 3, 2011
Ew, your hair looks like pubes!
“Friend” (another woman of color) watching me get my hair cut, commenting on its color, coarseness, and curls as it hit the floor. Made me feel alone, lik...
- May 3, 2011
This is totally an experience a lot of white kids can relate to. I once had a friend who wished she was Indian - LOVED the food, dance, culture, everything! Then she went to China and wished she was C...
- May 3, 2011
Microaggressions panel at Hunter College tomorrow!
If you’re in New York City, come to a panel hosted by the Coalition for the Revitalization of Asian American Studies at Hunter (CRAASH):
R...
- May 3, 2011
I don’t think Velma Kelly can be played by a black girl. It just wouldn’t seem right.
My friend after I told her that I’d like to play a lead role in the Broadway musical Chicago. Stu...
- May 3, 2011
You should be grateful. You may not get all that attention one day. Lots of girls would trade places with you.
A friend in response to me explaining how I feel diminished and humiliated when men sho...
- May 3, 2011
What, were you hit on the head too many times as a kid?
Teacher, jokingly. He wasn’t; I actually was. I even have the permanent balance disorder to show for it....
- May 2, 2011
At a rally against the passing of Proposition 8 in San Diego, I was brought up to the front of the crowd to stand next to the speaker so that I could be their token Asian woman in case anyone wanted ...
- May 2, 2011
Smile.
A girl who wanted to see what color my gums were. I was 14, in 9th grade religion class....
- May 2, 2011
I really don’t like [a graduate student speaker’s fellow classmate]; he’s so disgusting and fat. I hate fat people. They’re so lazy…. No one should be fat, not even poor ...
- May 2, 2011
I am told to apologize to my grandmother for crying and “making a scene” at Easter dinner after my cousin tells me he’s glad gay men can’t donate blood; that way he’ll ne...
- May 2, 2011
If I should mention, for any reason, if it’s asked, if it just comes up in conversation, that I’ve taken multiple self defense classes, the response that I almost always get from men, from...
- May 2, 2011
Can I say that I have yellow fever?
An ex, to me. In the USA & made me feel angry & marginalized....
- May 1, 2011
Though I intentionally wear skirts that fall below my knees and tops that come up to my neck, I am told that my dress is distracting or inappropriate. Because my non plus-sized co-workers wear mini-sk...
- May 1, 2011
Black male coworker: Hey, are you familiar with the phrase (some old-timey phrase I don’t know)?Me: No. I’ve never heard it. Maybe my dad has… What does it mean?Coworker: Oh, I f...
- June 30, 2011
In the past month, there have been two sexual assaults reported at my university, and a former student who molested a 12-year-old on campus has received his jail sentence. Number of editorials in the ...
- June 30, 2011
I don’t care if some gays somewhere get married. What I care about is when this begins to affect my children.
My mom [translation from Russian]. November 2008, after I told her I was registe...
- June 30, 2011
I like my women how I like my olive oil - extra virgin ; )
A Facebook status by a friend....
- June 30, 2011
Yeah, you’re really making a statement with those.
My best friend when I [a genderqueer female] told him that growing my armpit hair makes me feel strong. I got an accompanying pat on the shou...
- June 30, 2011
All this birther stuff is making me sad. I’m Korean American, adopted by white American parents, and came to the US when I was twelve weeks old. I still remember being upset when we studied the ...
- June 30, 2011
People are always asking me why I don’t speak Spanish because I’m half-Mexican and my last name is Garcia. I’m fourth-generation American on my Mexican side, and my mother would be e...
- June 30, 2011
When I went to Miami with my friends, we stayed in a hostel. There were many people from all different countries but Asia. When I entered the hostel with my friends one day, one of Caucasian guys sit...
- June 29, 2011
She’s a dude, anyone who wouldn’t fuck me is a dude in my head.
Said about one of my lesbian friends. Made me feel like my sexuality defined me....
- June 29, 2011
A white, straight male cohort described our thesis professor as “Half-black but all bitch.”
I am a queer, mixed-race woman. Happened 4/26/11, in college, in San Francisco. Made me feel a...
- June 29, 2011
While attending a predominantly white church during Easter Sunday, I noticed that several white families of four were instantly ushered into available seats at the front. However, a black man and his ...
- June 29, 2011
Are you the nanny?
I’m young, dark of a multi-ethnic background. My husband is Chinese so our kids are lighter. Since having my kids I’ve been asked several times if I am the nanny and...
- June 29, 2011
Elementary school playground chant:
Chinese people are really funny,this is how they count their money,oocha, koocha, turn around and bootcha!...
- June 28, 2011
Are you a child? Because you look like a child and sound like a child.
A drunk man at a friends 21st birthday party. I am 5 feet tall, petite,and have very small breasts and no butt. All my life I...
- June 28, 2011
A facebook friend posts a status to the effect that “Rape jokes are offensive and not funny at all.” The first two responses are rape jokes. One commenter apologized, but the other went ...
- June 28, 2011
While at a meeting for a program for underreprestented students in graduate education another student asks me “what I am.” So I tell her I’m Irish, German, English and Puerto Rican...
- June 28, 2011
At the local diner, the waitress asked my friend what I would like to eat. Apparently, because I use a wheelchair, I am unable to order my own lunch....
- June 28, 2011
“What happened that made you gay?” to which I responded, “What happened that made you straight?”
From a co-worker, upon discovering my orientation. Made me feel damaged, unwho...
- June 27, 2011
A friend tells me a story of how he sold expired tickets to two black men and then felt he had to get away from the “scary black guys” before they “stabbed him.” The friend is ...
- June 27, 2011
I don’t understand why you take everything as a racial comment!
Said by a friend when I expressed my shock in reaction to him making a comment about someone being “a stupid Puerto Rican....
- June 27, 2011
When I was in high school and told a fellow classmate I was dyslexic and had other learning disorders, she said, “Does that mean you’re stupid or something?” I was 15, in high schoo...
- June 27, 2011
The Pokémon move “Attract” only works on Pokémon of the “opposite” gender. The move does not work on genderless Pokémon.
My couch in front of a Game Boy. I felt unsurprised...
- June 27, 2011
Note on submissions: THANK YOU for all of your contributions so far to The Microaggressions Project! We’ve gotten many questions about submissions not being posted yet!
Just so you know, we’ve que...
- June 27, 2011
Submission we liked ;)
I’m biracial and I have a vaguely Muslim-sounding name. People keep accusing me of being a terrorist and I had to hold a press conference about my birth certificate to pr...
- June 26, 2011
You know the difference between unemployment and welfare? People on unemployment used to have jobs and were just laid off. People on welfare are lazy and sit on their asses all day.
Overheard at a r...
- June 25, 2011
Do you seriously believe anyone thinks women ‘have the responsibility to be sexually available to men’? I totally reject this concept. Prove it exists and I will be willing to acknowledge ...
- June 25, 2011
No you can’t like him. It’s the most disgusting thing to mix a Black and an Asian!
A friend, after I told her I liked a guy at my university. She assumed I was completely Asian, but I co...
- June 25, 2011
I was hanging out with my boyfriend, and my dad asked him to help out with building the deck. I sat waiting by the pool. Eventually my boyfriend left and my mom came home. Mom said, “Apparently ...
- June 25, 2011
When I’m buying clothing in the women’s department, I get stares, rude service, and sometimes hostile comments. The worst hurt came once when a woman at the checkout refused to look at me ...
- June 25, 2011
It’s ok- you’re a girl.
Father to his 3 year-old daughter who was having trouble climbing a rock wall in my gymnastics class....
- June 25, 2011
Make hunger cry like a girl.
Ad in the train station about a new sandwich bar. How can we get rid of sexist stereotypes if companies are embracing them for humorous tag lines and plastering them up...
- June 24, 2011
Osama is dead.
A white man as he walked past me, a Muslim woman who wears hijab. I hear variations on this (including people shouting “Osama” or “Bin Laden”, often while pret...
- June 24, 2011
My parents regularly recieve mail addressed to Dr. and Mrs. John P___________. My mother has a name of her own, and my parents met while attending the same medical school....
- June 24, 2011
Why do you focus so much on rape victims? Men who go to war get PTSD too. Don’t you care about them?
My husband to me. So, I can’t be passionate about one group of victims if they’...
- June 24, 2011
She’s very butch… but cute.
My boss, describing a former employee to a customer. She recently fired a butch woman who was not “cute” for reasons I think were at least partial...
- June 24, 2011
I am walking down the sidewalk in NYC with cell phone in hand; I look down at a text, and when I look up, there is a white woman stopped front of me. She says “Excuse me?” like I am not fi...
- June 24, 2011
You would make more money if you had a boob-job. Then you’d be an 8 instead of a 6.
Bar patron to me while I served him drinks and explaining why he tipped me poorly. Because my personality, t...
- June 24, 2011
Wow! Looks like you’ve got a lot of food, there!
Coworkers to me, a female. They don’t comment on men who routinely buy double lunches but comment on my large lunch food container. Made...
- June 23, 2011
My sister has black people hair! she has to use colored people shampoo! I feel so bad for her, like all her friends have pretty straight blond hair and she has like, an afro!
A white girl, in front ...
- June 23, 2011
I am Native American and have an academic, diversity scholarship. I am constantly asked why I received my scholarship by other recipients and when I tell them I always get disbelieving stares, eye rol...
- June 23, 2011
Whenever a waiter or waitress automatically gives the check to the male at the table....
- June 23, 2011
A young American patriot, Sybil Ludington is the female counterpart to the more famous Paul Revere.
National Women’s History Museum website about Sybil Ludington, who rode 40 more miles tha...
- June 23, 2011
But they are farther away from me and not as fun.
My straight female friend, after I (a gay man) pointed out that she and her boyfriend can safely go to one of the many clubs in the city that aren&#...
- June 22, 2011
While hanging out with two of my girlfriends one made a comment that I should come with a warning label because I’m a feminist as if it was a bad thing....
- June 22, 2011
My granny told me she ‘has found a man for me’, I came out as lesbian to my mum a few months ago, and she was totally fine with it. When I told her what my granny said she replied ‘w...
- June 22, 2011
You didn’t shave your legs? That’s disgusting!
One of my male friends after telling him how I didn’t really feel the need to shave my legs. I am a female college age student. This ...
- June 22, 2011
Can you please not use the word queer? It’s a derogatory word. It makes me uncomfortable.
People when I tell people that my major is Queer Studies. I’m queer. The people who say it are u...
- June 22, 2011
“What are you doing? Kat! Stop acting so WEIRD, people will think there’s something wrong with you.”
Why yes dad, there is something wrong with me, kind of: I have Asperger’s ...
- June 22, 2011
My life-threatening car accident left me with a six figure hospital bill. My mother is happily telling my grandfather (her father) how the hospital gave me one of their charity grants and forgave my d...
- June 22, 2011
In the instructions to my prescription yeast infection medication, there is a “helpful tip” about how “if your partner [is experiencing negative symptoms], he should…”
...
- June 21, 2011
When applying to college, my college counselor kept insisting that I apply for financial aid and take the Spanish SAT 2. My family is upper middle-class, and I am a tan Filipino/Persian with very li...
- June 21, 2011
Facebook ad: “Women love this game! Join your friends to nurture a baby dragon and watch it grow into an adult.” ...
- June 21, 2011
Well they ARE allowed to read now, so why can’t they catch up?
A white girl’s response to me and my friend’s argument that affirmative action was created to reverse centuries of in...
- June 21, 2011
I don’t think that’s true. You’re just not the type.
A friend, when I told her I was queer....
- June 21, 2011
My boyfriend sent me a cartoon that called women ‘whores’ based on their clothing choices. When I got upset, he said, “Why are you so upset? This happens to guys, too.” ...
- June 21, 2011
When I first saw you in class, I thought ‘Whoa! She’s really hot.’ Then you answered a question, and I thought ‘Man! Big tits, blonde hair, and smart? No way!
A guy in my col...
- June 21, 2011
I am a Black woman and went to my doctor for prenatal care. He looked at my blood work and announced “Wow! No diseases! Good for you! Congratulations!” After expressing his shock...
- June 20, 2011
It’s okay that you’re gay, just please stick with white girls.
My mother’s family, any time my dating life comes up. ...
- June 20, 2011
I hate the shocked expression people get when I tell them that I am applying to do Astrophysics at university just because I’m female, or the response of: “really?!”, “You must...
- June 20, 2011
ARE YOU WHITE?
Screamed at me, over and over, by a man following me down the street in Los Angeles. I am an “ambiguous” looking woman of Jewish/Ukrainian descent and am regularly asked a...
- June 20, 2011
She thinks she’s white. She won’t wear any of the Juicy Couture clothes I got her.
A co-worker talking about her adopted daughter. Made me appalled and worried for her daughter....
- June 20, 2011
You communicate like a girl, I just don’t get it. I’m a guy. You need to just say what you mean!
In an argument with a male friend, during which my explicit statements of my feelings and...
- June 20, 2011
perspective of privilege, eh? by saying that many men ‘mansplain’ aren’t you, in a de facto sort of way, reinforcing sexism? (by stereotyping the behavior of some of the other sex)
...
- June 19, 2011
I’m just saying there’s no reason for you to carry your suitcase when there’s a strong, capable man around to do it for you.
I was carrying the suitcase when my grandmother said th...
- June 19, 2011
On finding out that I, a Dominican immigrant, was attending a prestigious university, a doctor I was seeing for the first time tells me that she thought “you people” don’t go to coll...
- June 19, 2011
I believe in equal rights for gay people, but I wish they wouldn’t kiss in public. It’s gross.
My mother, a few years ago. We’ve got a long way to go....
- June 19, 2011
I don’t really have an opinion because it’s not my fight.
My sister when I tried to explain why it upset me when her friend used “gay” as a generic insult. It made me feel b...
- June 19, 2011
No disrespect, man.
Man on street apologizing TO MY BOYFRIEND after harassing ME and realizing later that I was walking with a guy who was a few steps behind....
- June 18, 2011
I don’t know why she even bothers. If I were her, I’d put a gun in my mouth.
My father, when asked by a clinician to describe how he felt about my schizophrenia. I was horrified. ...
- June 18, 2011
It was Jenny’s fault that her life was bad, because she allowed being abused to affect her. Forrest just moved on from everything - that’s how you should think.
A high school teacher, af...
- June 18, 2011
My high school’s mascot was the Redskin logo of an “Indian”, in the old sense of the term. As someone with Native American heritage, I felt hurt and mocked when, every time at spor...
- June 18, 2011
When my friend uses the phrase “That’s straight” when referring to something good....
- June 18, 2011
Oh, I have one of those.
Older white woman commenting to my mother-in-law about my mixed-race son at a restaurant. ...
- June 18, 2011
Whenever I go anywhere with my “friends” (predominantly white), they feel it necessary to tell me (a black girl) when we’re passing a cotton field. I try to tell them that it’s...
- June 17, 2011
Oh, when did you get your ear pierced, and is that the gay one?
Cashier while I am ordering food with a friend. ...
- June 17, 2011
Every online form or application where the default is set to “male,” even in cases when gender should not even be an issue and in cases where the majority of people filling out the form wo...
- June 17, 2011
No. It’s bad enough to have *one* kid like… that.
My mum, after I told my younger sister it was okay if the person she had a crush on was a girl. I’m queer, which apparently is ‘...
- June 17, 2011
I don’t mean to be rude, but…WHAT are you? Your ethnic mixture is gorgeous.
White woman coming up to me in the public restroom. As a Chinese-Malay/Russian-Canadian multiracial woman, i...
- June 17, 2011
“Hey Sweet Sister!” “Oh I’d love some chocolate in my life!” “Sexual Chocolate!” “I love black women because their butts are so big!” “I lov...
- June 16, 2011
Friend: Sit and spin.
A straight friend of mine, holding up his middle finger and talking to another straight male. I am 20 year old out gay man and these friends are generally liberal. Made me feel...
- June 16, 2011
A white male co-worker said to me an African American woman, after a phone consultation with a client, “You should have talked to that client because she was black...of course you would have to ...
- June 16, 2011
My friend (Indian) and I (Sri Lankan, but often lumped in the ‘Indian’ category) sat next to a (white) guy who immediately turned to his (white) friend, whispering: “Indian girls are...
- June 16, 2011
My daughter, the man.
My mother, on finding out I had decided to stop shaving. I’m ashamed of her transphobia and body policing....
- June 16, 2011
Sure you didn’t blow it out of proportion hun?
What my boyfriend said after I told him how a man at the voting polls followed me around the block until I hid in a coffee shop. I am 22, Canada,...
- June 16, 2011
I decide I want to be a vegetarian, and my mother agrees to support me if I talk to a nutritionist about how to get enough protein, B12, etc. The nutritionist spends our entire appointment measuring m...
- June 15, 2011
An older male author came into my publishing house unannounced to pitch a book. After he and my (older, male) coworker discussed all the (older, male) professors they had studied under and were on a f...
- June 15, 2011
I feel so shiftless, no good and guilty. I might go wait by the bench.
My mom, in reference to the fact that I’m disabled and was buying food with food stamps at a grocery store....
- June 15, 2011
You’re an engineering major? Wow, totally wouldn’t have seen you as an engineer… I always picture them as men.
Freshman year of college, talking to a male friend. Made me feel eve...
- June 15, 2011
What’s the point of being a gay trans man? Why didn’t you just stay a straight girl?
Said many times over the past five years by gay cis men. Made me feel vulnerable, invisible, and defe...
- June 15, 2011
Here, taste this. You’re the rice expert.
I am a 15 year old Asian female. ...
- June 15, 2011
Girl, why aren’t you smiling? Smile! I’m here so everything’s cool.
A male dining worker (that I don’t know) to me in my school’s food court....
- June 15, 2011
It can be pretty hard to hear over the noise, so ladies, just yell at me like I’m your boyfriend.
Instructor at art school workshop. Made me angry not only that people assume we are all straig...
- June 15, 2011
If you cut your hair, you’ll never get a boyfriend. No man wants to deal with that nappy hair.
My hair dresser when I wanted to do the big chop and get rid of my relaxed hair. I was a teenag...
- June 14, 2011
Boys will be boys.
My principal to myself and two other girls who had come forward about boys in our class who harassed us daily. Made me feel outraged, helpless....
- June 14, 2011
Wrestling is for people who are big and strong, like boys.
My teacher to my 8-year old girl self when I said I wanted to sign up for wrestling. The whole class laughed at me. Made me feel embarra...
- June 14, 2011
Every year I need to go to the downtown library for some research project or another. As a young girl, every single year I have been harassed - once, an older man sat next to me in a room full of empt...
- June 14, 2011
I work in the childrens’ lit department of a library. Ever since I started wearing a rainbow wrist band and button to work, mothers with their daughters won’t approach me to ask for help. ...
- June 14, 2011
At lunch with coworkers when a male actor’s history of domestic violence is mentioned. I outline the chain of events and women he has abused, and after hearing about one of his victims, one of m...
- June 14, 2011
I return to campus after working all day to find that there is a protest going on. I ask the first person I see, a white male, what the protest is about, and he tells me that it was “only for st...
- June 14, 2011
Oh look, the Joy Luck Club.
Guy who’s not my friend and knows I don’t appreciate it when he says that whenever I’m with another East Asian American woman. He does it to get a ris...
- June 13, 2011
Link: Upcoming documentary "Dark Girls"
Clips from the upcoming documentary exploring the deep-seated biases and attitudes about skin color - particularly dark skinned women, outside of and within ...
- June 13, 2011
The Women’s studies department once held a Sandwich-making day in his honor.
This is part of a campaign slogan for a white, male student who is running for class president at my college. I am ...
- June 13, 2011
I’m proud of the woman you’ve become. I was so afraid you’d be a lesbian when you were growing up.
My father said that to me when I wore a dress. How am I supposed to come out to h...
- June 13, 2011
Smile, sweetheart! It’s not that bad!
A random older white man standing around by the parking lot I, a 21 year old woman, was leaving. I wasn’t even scowling or glaring or anything, I ju...
- June 13, 2011
Aboriginal mother with a baby stroller crossing the street in front of my car. My female coworker says “There goes another fucking future welfare check.”
I’m a white-looking aborig...
- June 13, 2011
I walk up to the counter at the gas station with oil for my car, with my boyfriend next to me. The old man behind the counter says “Good afternoon, sir, how can I help you.” I take out mon...
- June 12, 2011
I tend to make it one word because transgender and transsexual are one word, and it’s kind of my way of saying both at once (even though they’re different).
About the term “transpe...
- June 12, 2011
I can’t work out how to do that, that’s not how girl brains work.
My mother to my father, a minor squabble over a minor piece of DIY work. I was disappointed....
- June 12, 2011
After getting on the subway, I pass over a dozen empty seats and settle into a corner (standing, quite comfortably) to read. An older man sitting on the other side of the car waves at me until I take ...
- June 12, 2011
It’s finally warm and rocked a knee length skirt and bare legs to work. One of my male coworkers paused in the hallway, stared me up and down and exclaimed “Damn, nice legs.” I was s...
- June 12, 2011
Are you the one with the tipis or the one with the Slurpees?
I’m a 20-year-old black female. This happened in high school a few years ago. A girl in my class said this to me after I told her...
- June 11, 2011
In my emergency medical training class, one of the questions on our exams read “What does healthy skin look like?”
The expected answer was “pink.” When I’m healthy, my sk...
- June 11, 2011
To my boss who told me that her outfit was inspired by my “heritage”: My culture and history CANNOT be summed up in an outfit comprised of pink plastic chopsticks in your hair, a matching ...
- June 11, 2011
Lecturing physician: “Any of your fathers orthopedic surgeons?” 10 minutes later… “Are any of your mothers or sisters hospice nurses?”
In a medical school lecture - made me feel like tra...
- June 11, 2011
Look at you, being all domestic!
I was in the kitchen of my boyfriend’s apartment when his roommate’s girlfriend stepped out and saw me cooking pasta. Made me feel embarrassed, ashamed o...
- June 11, 2011
I have a part-time job in an outdoors shop. When I, a female, am training new (male) employees in how to correctly fit propane to cookers customers will walk up to us and talk directly to them when as...
- June 11, 2011
Wow so your family is like the song Jesus Loves the Little Children of the World? You know “red and yellow, black and white, they are precious in his site?” That’s so weird, but kind...
- June 10, 2011
I was attending a Safe Zone training session to be officially recognized as supportive to LGBT people. In the first five minutes, the presenter mispronouned me and upon my correcting her, did not refe...
- June 10, 2011
Over the course of a semester, an openly gay and generally well-liked male professor at my school singled me (female bodied student) out in my class and made several comments to me about my clothing, ...
- June 10, 2011
Recently I was sharing my dismay about France’s ban on burqas, niqabs on my facebook page and was told by a friend “how about you share something positive.” I am so tired of people t...
- June 10, 2011
I am a Black woman sitting with a Navajo (Dineh) Native American woman and her daughter in a minority cultural center. The Navajo woman passes an orange to her daughter and laughs that she bought it...
- June 10, 2011
When you see crooked teeth, you think, you know, trailer trash.
My media ethics professor explaining the temptation of magazines to Photoshop pictures of people with crooked teeth. I grinned widely ...
- June 10, 2011
I was in the parking lot of a grocery store, after buying an after-school snack to eat. This man came up to me with a jar of money and said, “Chao!” I said, “Hello,” then the m...
- June 9, 2011
It’s just that… you two stand out more when people enter the room, because your so….
My vice principle trying to defend against my accusations of some of the teaching staff being s...
- June 9, 2011
It’s like I have two daughters!
My father, as hearing from both my brother and myself that we do not enjoy sports games. He had known this for years. It made me feel like to him there is somet...
- June 9, 2011
But you can’t be a lesbian! What will I tell my friends?!
My mother, upon my telling her that I was in love with a woman....
- June 9, 2011
You can’t be a person of colour; you’re too pale!
I’m a mixed race/bi-racial teenager living in Birmingham, UK with a white, French mother and a Morrocan Bedouin (ethnically Arabic...
- June 9, 2011
No homo.
After hearing a straight male friend repeatedly say “no homo” to another straight male friend, I (a queer woman) told him that I was offended. His response? “I wasn̵...
- June 9, 2011
My father-in-law, about a local woman found murdered recently: “She was an architect! It’s not as if she was a street-walker or something!”
Because it would have been less tragic if ...
- June 8, 2011
I heard my English father-in-law refer to people of Indian and Pakistani background “Pakis”. He said that this isn’t offensive because it’s just an abbreviation.
And he says ...
- June 8, 2011
#damn right #so this is cool and stuff
Tags on a reblog of a tumblr post describing how bison in the US had been hunted to extinction as a tactic to wipe out indigenous people. ...
- June 8, 2011
A family acquaintance discussing with my mother my dream of attending law school in New York: “Don’t worry, Mom. I’m sure she’ll find a man up there to take care of her.̶...
- June 8, 2011
Standing next to the ex who sexually assaulted me, at a protest for women’s rights, still to scared to say anything. Everyone tells me “He’s a pretty big figure in our community, bes...
- June 8, 2011
aeraspais:
To be honest, I dislike how often discussions of racism get derailed to explain to people that the dictionary definition is out-of-date and inadequa...
- June 7, 2011
Those women in the Middle East are so oppressed. The saddest part is they are not educated enough to know anything else. They don’t know any better.
My 10th grade History teacher...
- June 7, 2011
Looking at a forum I often lurk on, a topic is posted about a trend in Korea and Japan where some people get perms that mimic coarse African hair. 90% of comments range from: ‘disgusting’ ...
- June 7, 2011
Mum: Don’t mention men, she hates them.
When having a good discussion with my Aunty, who I hadn’t seen for four years, about my feminst views and the fact that I’m a lesbian.
Made m...
- June 7, 2011
My economics textbook holds the phrase “One of the ways to increase healthcare in developing countries is to train nurses recruited from the community to diagnose and treat simple ailments. Thes...
- June 7, 2011
Postsecret submission...
- June 7, 2011
www.games2girls.com
A site of “the loveliest games for girls”, which include mostly cooking, fashion, and beauty games....
- June 6, 2011
I am the office manager for an academic department at a large private university. Recently, a male undergraduate student emailed both me and my male assistant. In the email, he referred to me as ̶...
- June 6, 2011
A law school writing instructor returned my essay to me with a C+ grade. Although she could not point to a single discernible grammatical or stylistic error, she claimed my writing sounded “fore...
- June 6, 2011
Every time a newspaper misgenders a trans person....
- June 6, 2011
Just smile for me baby, let me see that pretty smile.
A man who cornered me downtown and asked me for bus fare. When I said I didn’t have any change, he wouldn’t let me pass until I smil...
- June 6, 2011
I work in the IT department of my college. Just now, I saw a guy in my circle of friends waiting for a document to print. I addressed him by his first name and told him the printer wasn’t workin...
- June 5, 2011
On my second day of student teaching a first-grade class in Harlem, a white music teacher calls me to the front. She asks me to help out: “Tell us: what is China? Is it a city, a state?” ...
- June 5, 2011
My med school classmate is arguing that estate tax is too high. He says, “$250,000 is hardly anything, especially considering your house is part of your estate. Everyone should have $250,000 by ...
- June 5, 2011
Just one nurse for all these doctors?
Another teacher in my middle school when he stopped by to talk to my teacher, who was leading an elective physics and biology class. I was the only girl enrolle...
- June 5, 2011
My male physics teacher asks me after every lesson if I understood everything that was said and reminding me that if I have any problems with the material I’m welcome to email him or see him aft...
- June 5, 2011
Every day when I walk to school, people in cars honk or whistle at me when they pass by. Sometimes they slow down to look at me. I have never met any of these people and they have no reason to honk at...
- June 5, 2011
I was talking to my (now ex) boyfriend, a music composition major, about the trouble I was having trying to learn to compose. He told me that women just aren’t as good at composing as men are be...
- June 4, 2011
Well, I wanted to go to Columbia, but of course I didn’t get in because I’m a middle-class white guy.
A post-doctoral student in my graduate program, to me, a minority woman who went to ...
- June 4, 2011
I wish I was retarded. Then no one would expect anything of me, and I’d have lower expectations of myself. I’d be able to just sit at home and be retarded all day.
I’ve spent my wh...
- June 4, 2011
I’ve never seen you with a woman, so in my mind you’re just straight.
Like my queer identity depends only on who I’m with at the current moment....
- June 4, 2011
My friend and I were at the Frick museum for a college project. I am South Asian, she’s Greek and light-skinned. The man in charge of the audio tour guides automatically gave her an audio tour g...
- June 4, 2011
My mom told me today in a mall parking lot that she could still see me with a man someday. I’m a 22 year-old straight-looking lesbian. I felt invalidated....
- June 4, 2011
“Wow, you’re good on those things!”
“Whoa, you get around well!”
“Slow down speedy!”
Random strangers seeing me walk with crutches, especially when it involve...
- June 4, 2011
A white male comedy club promoter with a British accent on the streets on NYC approached us and asked where we came from, perhaps we’d be interested in seeing a free comedy show that night. Aft...
- June 3, 2011
Whenever we go out to dinner or especially when we go to see family, my father asks me, “Are you going to put some makeup on?”...
- June 3, 2011
In a class talking about men lifting large rocks, a girl says something about women being able to lift them, too. She looks around at all the men around her and quickly says, “Haha, I’m ju...
- June 3, 2011
I’m renewing my discount card at a video game store, and the clerk suggests I give the extra card to my husband to earn more points. I’m a 29 year-old black bi woman gamer, and so is my pa...
- June 3, 2011
Oh, that chick is asking for it.
Man outside of a club referring to the length of my skirt....
- June 3, 2011
Link: An allied poem we like!
“The Bridge Poem” by Donna Kate Ruskin...
- June 3, 2011
“When filling out a form at a dermatologist’s office, I am prompted to select which “high-risk group” I belong to. Possible options: gay, lesbian, bisexual.If they are really concerned abo...
- June 3, 2011
WHY are you Atheist?
An everyday question - it’s rare to hear someone asked “Why are you Christian?” or “Why are you Jewish?” but it’s common for atheists to be asked to explain ...
- June 3, 2011
When I was seven years old, I was at a sleepover and the only Indian girl there. While I was changing in the closet (because I was too uncomfortable changing in front of all the other girls), I over...
- June 3, 2011
I have lots of sympathy for women, but I have no sympathy for feminists.
Male classmate, at school, yesterday. Apparently it’s okay to feel sorry for women, as long as they don’t try to ...
- June 2, 2011
But is it really that big a deal?
Liberal straight white friend, speculating aloud to my queer partner and me whether having to stay closeted in the military really makes much different to a queer p...
- June 2, 2011
On one of the first days of sixth grade in my new school when two girls corner me and start asking me, “Are you a lesbian?” over and over again, pronouncing the word “lesbian” ...
- June 2, 2011
While hugging my friend and braiding her hair (also a girl) while waiting for our bus number to be called, a boy in our class looks at us and starts singing, “Why are you gay?” to the tune...
- June 2, 2011
Well, don’t lose too much weight, or else you’ll be way out of my league!
In bed with my partner, after I told her the details of why I wanted to run a marathon, as if I had to be defect...
- June 1, 2011
I’m on the light-rail, it’s gotten incredibly crowded, standing room only. I look up from my book and realize that there is a single seat available - between me, a cross-dressing male, ...
- June 1, 2011
I don’t think I like your tone of voice.
White male lawyer, “responding” to my politely angry sister’s question about our condo association’s roofing contract. This law...
- June 1, 2011
When I handed in my class work in a simple folder instead of a proper art portfolio, my art professor harped on it for a good 5-10 minutes instead of grading my work, praising other students’ pr...
- June 1, 2011
You’ve been kind of hogging the spotlight.
Friend, after I answered some classmates’ questions about my disability....
- June 1, 2011
I was walking down the street hand-in-hand with my girlfriend. An unknown woman stopped in front of us and snapped, “You’re excused!”...
- July 31, 2011
The hardware store for women.
A billboard in my town advertising a jewelry store. As a woman who prefers power tools to jewelry, this makes me feel like an outsider - like I don’t count. It s...
- July 31, 2011
Link: "I'm not racist, but..."
A little meta/macro, but interesting tumblr!...
- July 31, 2011
Well I hope you didn’t hurt his feelings.
My father after I told him about a grocery store employee inappropriately flirting with me/invading my personal space in the produce section. Made me ...
- July 31, 2011
Broadway was a trail left by the Indians long before any Americans came here.
This last Sunday, from a tour guide. Angry and incredulous at his ignorance....
- July 31, 2011
The media is making a big deal about female NASCAR driver Danica Patrick’s decision to not have children. When was the last time the media made a big deal about a male’s decision not to ha...
- July 31, 2011
sugar or spice is alright but i’ll pass on the chocolate and rice
Grindr profile....
- July 31, 2011
One way of checking if someone who’s collapsed is okay is to check the inside of their lip is still pink. Now Daisy isn’t the same colour as the rest of us but if she opens her mouth you&#...
- July 30, 2011
When friends/acquaintances feel the need to go down the list of every queer person they know upon my disclosure of my queer identity. I am a 22 year old recent college graduate. I feel annoyed, pige...
- July 30, 2011
Oh no, I’m sure your grandma and aunt aren’t dirty Haitians, they’re, you know, good Haitian.
My POC friend after complaining that a guy she was flirting with thought she was a ...
- July 30, 2011
I didn’t know that such a dark girl could be pretty.
I was 11....
- July 30, 2011
In the hospital where I take classes, there is a resident who never calls me by my name. He always calls me “little wild critter” even so I have told him not to do it, and just laughs it off when ...
- July 30, 2011
My job requires physical labor, including building and lifting. When building a landscape display that I designed, the owner’s husband walked out and yelled, “Watch out! Lady with a hammer...
- July 30, 2011
I’m sitting on the bus coming back from a field trip, and a girl starts talking about how the housing at her university accidentally messed up her gender, someone makes a joke about her masculin...
- July 30, 2011
Whenever I see a group of black guys near me I run away or stop dancing…I don’t want one of them to start dancing with me or try to do something to me. Black guys are like so scary!
My w...
- July 30, 2011
I have no idea how to come out to my colleagues as trans after I overheard them using transphobic slurs and calling another transgender person an “it.” I’m a young teacher in a rura...
- July 29, 2011
I work on commission in a male-dominated electronics store, and I know exactly what I’m talking about. However, I will always get customers that either ask to talk to a man, or “Someone w...
- July 29, 2011
Our contribution form was down for the past three days, but it’s fixed now! If you ever experience technical issues, please email us or tweet at @microaggressive!...
- July 29, 2011
You don’t count! I want the camp kind of gay who will come shopping with me and watch chick flicks. Besides, you’re a girl at heart anyway.
My straight, cis friend of 18 years, after she...
- July 29, 2011
Are you going to permanently straighten your hair or get a weave? I mean, you’d be a lot prettier if you did.
White female friend to me. I’m biracial (half black, half white) and I have...
- July 29, 2011
When I was 10 years old, my aunt noticed that my barbie collection included some black barbies. She treated them like they were hilarious and told me that barbies should only be white. We are both bir...
- July 29, 2011
During “free play”, I want to play with toy farm animals, but am told by my teacher that they are for boys only and I should play with “ladylike” toys. When I complain to my pa...
- July 29, 2011
The TV commercials that sell “solutions” to curly hair-by making it straight with hair products and regular straightening with flat irons. Not only is this damaging to your already-beautif...
- July 29, 2011
Living without God is like Aunt Jemima living wthout syrup, like Uncle Ben living without rice…
A poet (not black) at a spoken word event at an African American church. Made me feel embarrass...
- July 28, 2011
Oh, you’re not here to hook up with guys.
In my computer programming class. I was wearing a Legend of Zelda shirt this particular day, which somehow convinced him I was “really” th...
- July 28, 2011
Showed up on my news feed. Made me feel shocked, blamed....
- July 28, 2011
He’s a really good writer.
My college English class’ response to a piece written by an anonymous writer, assumed the writer was male because the writing was good. Made me feel ignored a...
- July 28, 2011
God damn, some people.
I was buying chocolate at the corner store next to my house, and some significantly older guy kept asking me how I am in an increasingly irritated voice. I have a communicatio...
- July 28, 2011
Yeah, there’s this Chinese girl in my dorm. She said her name’s Sarah - I don’t know what her REAL name is, though.
...
- July 28, 2011
Wow, look at all these black kids. Hey, I bet they all have the same dad. All black people are totally related.
Our school choir was going to sing the national anthem at the ball park, and a couple ...
- July 27, 2011
Recently, I was out at a street festival with a friend, when some random dude walked by and decided to spout, “Hey, beautiful.” in our general direction. I paid no particular attention, a...
- July 27, 2011
I never knew there were black goths!
White saleswoman in a store to me (African-American). Made me feel invisible....
- July 27, 2011
That’s funny; you don’t seem Hispanic.
About 100 times by people I met when I moved to Portland, Oregon....
- July 27, 2011
Is English your second language?
Asked by my U.S. history teacher when I was a Junior in high school. I’m South-Asian American. It made me feel second-class. ...
- July 27, 2011
You have to think about how something like that would look on you’re resume. People might make assumptions.
My Dad, when I was deciding between volunteering at a GLBTQ health center and anothe...
- July 27, 2011
Sitting on a bench outside the large downtown office tower where I work, having a phone conversation in Korean with my grandmother. A professionally dressed white man in his 30s stops and takes severa...
- July 27, 2011
[Black Male Scientist] is an excellent scientist. Not just an excellent *black* scientist - an excellent scientist.
Head of conference [middle aged Asian American male] is introducing a pioneer in t...
- July 26, 2011
Lifting my bike onto my car’s bike rack, a man comes up behind me. “Need some help, young lady?” he asks. When I politely decline he says, “Ooooh! Independent!”
I am 37,...
- July 26, 2011
In a workbook given to children at the tutoring center where I work:Fill in the blank. Husbands have __________. The correct answer, of course, was ‘wives.’ ...
- July 26, 2011
Of course anyone has the option to become a stay-at-home mom, that’s what welfare is for!
Response when I suggested that income plays a role in parenting decisions....
- July 26, 2011
I don’t believe in quotas. I think you either make it, or you don’t.
My boyfriend’s father, a white man, while discussing racial quotas in schools. He successfully started his own ...
- July 26, 2011
What, are you deaf?
Actually yes - I am almost completely deaf in one ear. Makes me angry when I get this response, just because I asked someone to kindly repeat what they were saying. Makes me fe...
- July 26, 2011
I don’t know how well this software [facial recognition software] will work in places like Asia because all Chinese people look the same.
During a technical talk to a group of professional eng...
- July 25, 2011
Link: DC Comics SDCC panels: uncomfortable questions about female creators/characters
dcwomenkickingass:
The DC Comics panels at SDCC have been filled with what I being told are uncomfortable and...
- July 25, 2011
You’ll be fine! Just talk like a white person.
A white job-training counselor speaking to a young man of color about his upcoming job interview....
- July 25, 2011
That’s just the black in him coming out.
My white mother talking about my black father, after I complained he is frequently late. They divorced when I was little....
- July 25, 2011
And we all know bisexuals are just on the road to being gay.
Speaker at an LGBT conference....
- July 25, 2011
Headline on CNN’s website: “Yale suspends fraternity for raunchy chants.” The chants were pro-rape. “Raunchy?!” Try misogynistic and hateful. Just to start. Made me feel...
- July 25, 2011
Oh, of course you will change your mind. All women do.
In reference to my decision not give birth because I have a spine defect that could cause complications and career aspirations that would not l...
- July 25, 2011
Two co-workers are discussing an upcoming Boy Scouts car wash. One mentions that he always wanted to be a Girl Scout, not a Boy Scout. I’m pleasantly surprised by his willingness to join a group...
- July 25, 2011
You two boys can do this stretch against that wall.
Yoga teacher. The class consisted of me, four other women, and one man. I am genderqueer and visibly trans female....
- July 24, 2011
All the good men are taken, and all the rest are handicapped.
Friend of a friend doing a standup comedy act, unaware that a member of his audience is happily dating a paraplegic man. Everyone, inclu...
- July 24, 2011
This isn’t work-related, but just an FYI since I know you are interested in ‘women’s issues.’
My boss, in an email to me; I work at a ‘progressive non-profit’ wor...
- July 24, 2011
On Facebook, I complain about having to wait in long lines at the low income clinic. My mom’s friend replies, “Time to change doctors!” as though this were a possibility for me. She ...
- July 24, 2011
Seriously I get so tired of people trying to find racist or sexist undertones in stuff. Keep perpetuating it up so it never dies, that’ll work.
18 year old white female’s Facebook status...
- July 24, 2011
Is your mother an Oriental?
My boyfriend’s mother said this to me (a fair-skinned multi-racial 21 year old woman who often is referred to as “white”) when we were in a Korean resta...
- July 24, 2011
A lot of Asians.
The woman sitting in front of me at a Phi Beta Kappa induction ceremony where four out of forty-eight inductees were Asian. ...
- July 24, 2011
So you’ll bring a Jewish dish. (Coworker) could bring a Chinese dish! I’ll ask (coworker) to bring something Indian.
White coworker planning a potluck for our group, asking people to b...
- July 23, 2011
It was really horrible. There were, like, five Indians, and they all sat around talking about, like, brown shit, and it was the most shitty thing ever. I was hoping that there would be someone I could...
- July 23, 2011
How come all the manly people are over here? Well, you’re playing a video game right now so you lose your girl status.
As always, it’s a “joke.” “Over here” meant...
- July 23, 2011
Wow. You speak so quickly and you enunciate your words so well!
The first words out of the mouth of a white man in Washington, DC, after my mother gave a presentation. My mother has a very strong So...
- July 23, 2011
How can you be a feminist? You’re a dude.
Ignorant comment I sometimes receive that generalizes about feminism and who can be a feminist. Disrespected my gender identity as a queer femme.
Age ...
- July 23, 2011
Why are you getting the pink one?
Dad to kid at store who picked up a bottle of pink lemonade. The kid says he doesn’t care what color it is, but the dad makes him put it back. Via a friend...
- July 22, 2011
On a women’s magazine-style website, the very few articles on gay issues are always in the “sex” section, never under “love and relationships.”...
- July 22, 2011
Wait, you went to [Ivy League school]? But your family isn’t rich!
Co-worker, with surprise. Made me feel my working-class inferiority complex....
- July 22, 2011
It is important for movements to have allies, just like you and your partner are allies to the queer rights movement.
My co-worker at a progressive Asian Pacific Islander American organization in LA...
- July 22, 2011
Hey I like your suit and tie… but are you a dyke?
Drunk guy on the train, yesterday night. Made me feel annoyed, angry....
- July 22, 2011
Hey! HEY! Are you a guy or a girl?
Teenage guys in Wisconsin, me wearing cargo shorts. Made me feel angry, threatened, afraid....
- July 22, 2011
I am originally from Turkey. I write for a UK-based magazine. There was a news about Turkish Feminists and the writer placed a Turkish flag picture in the article that was not proper color. When I ask...
- July 22, 2011
I love gay guys, they’re so much fun! I would love to have a gay guy best friend, but lesbians are just annoying.
My college roommate when I was a freshman living in the dorms. Made me terrifi...
- July 21, 2011
So, which one of your parents is Arab and which one is Jewish?
Most people, when I say that I am an Arab Jew. Both of my parents are Arab and both of them are Jewish. At parties, demonstrations, i...
- July 21, 2011
I hold the door open for a middle aged-man at my work. ”Thank you,” he says, “but isn’t it normally supposed to be the other way around?”
“Well, it is the 21st cen...
- July 21, 2011
I just want to help you love yourself and be more confident, and maybe help you find a nice boy…
My mother, after telling me she wanted me to go on a diet. I am a 16 year old girl who is only ...
- July 21, 2011
You like little cute dogs. That’s feminine.
My mom, constantly trying to drag the femininity out of her butch daughter....
- July 21, 2011
I always get the two of you mixed up, I’m not sure why.
I’m pretty sure I know why: we’re the only two non-white/brown graduate students in our cohort. The chair of my department...
- July 20, 2011
My student house was recently burgled while my boyfriend and I (19 year old female) were in the building. Later, when one housemate wanted to know the details of the crime to claim insurance, he spe...
- July 20, 2011
Women shouldn’t be walking around by themselves.
My psychiatrist, who knows I’m a rape survivor. Made me feel blamed, hopeless, ashamed, powerless....
- July 20, 2011
Why are there so many party stores in the ghetto? Like do all the poor people like to celebrate they’re poor?
A friend, while driving near my work in a primarily central American immigrant com...
- July 20, 2011
I’m on the bus and a woman gets on. She tries to ask the driver if the bus is going to a certain stop, but the driver doesn’t understand her European accent and keeps, kindly, asking quest...
- July 20, 2011
You know that hairstyle is for guys, right?
A person commenting on the hair I gave my (female bodied) avatar on GaiaOnline. Made me feel annoyed, invalidated....
- July 20, 2011
Discussion | An email we received from a reader:
I feel very confused when I see submissions about a white person having a preference for only another white person when it comes to dating. I’m ...
- July 20, 2011
A speed dating party in Torrance, California for “Asian women and Western men”. See the description on Yelp for more.
We are looking for Asian women ages 23-41 who want to date Western Me...
- July 20, 2011
Your dad said it might mean you’re gay, but I told him that was impossible.
My mom, about my new and first earpiercings. Guess what mom? I’m gay. I am a 19 year old East Asian American...
- July 19, 2011
Is your son in a “Hardship Program?
Mother of my son’s friend, asking why my son was in a good school. I am an immigrant, and she could not even think of my son being a straight-A studen...
- July 19, 2011
FAQ | We finally put up our FAQ! Check it out here. If you have any other question you’d like to ask, submit them on our ask page....
- July 19, 2011
I was explaining to my boyfriend why I’m angry about Hooters coming to the UK and being called a ‘feminazi’ by a supposed friend. He said, “Yeah, but I mean you’re not re...
- July 19, 2011
You can’t really call yourself bisexual can you? I mean, you’ve been with (boyfriend) so long it hardly counts does it? (Sister) is gay, but for you it was more like just a phase, right? I...
- July 19, 2011
What’s the difference? All these Orientals are the same.
White male to me (East Asian female) after I corrected him when he mistook Korean writing for Japanese. I was speechless, shocked....
- July 19, 2011
Trending hashtag on Twitter for 5/19/2011: #shemighthaveadick. ...
- July 19, 2011
I am an Asian female in my early thirties. My older male supervisor at a social services agency always tells me, “I just don’t want you to be taken advantage of.” I have worked wit...
- July 19, 2011
Were they black?
What people ask when I describe how scary it was to have two men break into my home while I was there alone. It made me frustrated and sad—I was angry at the men who broke in,...
- July 18, 2011
Why do you listen to ‘Chinese music?’ You don’t even understand and they all look the same anyways.
My friends in class discussing my iPod list of Korean pop music. I felt hurt an...
- July 18, 2011
I play as a black character sometimes and it never bothers me.
My white male friend, after I explained that I feel alienated when videogames only offer white male characters....
- July 18, 2011
Homophobic Friends, a video montage of homophobic microaggressions on the television show Friends. Check out Bitch Magazine for more on this video. ...
- July 18, 2011
You’ll have no problems getting interviews because of who you are.
My fellowship advisor, when I spoke about my concerns of not having any publications at our check-in meeting. I’m a Ph...
- July 18, 2011
Oh, sorry we kept you waiting so long. From your surname on the form, we thought you were black!
Bank employee, after waiting for hours in line to my white mother-in-law with the West African surnam...
- July 18, 2011
At a dinner party for a group of physicists, a wife begins to tell a story about her friend who was adopting. Her husband says, derisively, “That’s the girly story, the interesting story...
- July 18, 2011
As my realtor knocks on the door to my new apartment, one of the current tenants - of Asian descent - answers the door. I recognize him from the first time I viewed the apartment. The realtor looks ...
- July 18, 2011
People with Southern accents always sound so ignorant and uneducated!
This attitude is prevalent all over the U.S., It’s common knowledge in the South that if you want to be taken seriously, y...
- July 17, 2011
Well, there are girls who have been kidnapped and raped by paedophiles because they were wearing short skirts.
Our headteacher when he was telling off a girl in my class for having a skirt that was ...
- July 17, 2011
I see there’s no code for mixed race on the FBI fingerprinting card I have to fill out for my new job, so I ask the woman doing the fingerprinting if I can put two races down. She says no and th...
- July 17, 2011
Don’t worry, I’m cool with the fact that you’re gay. So when did you decide you were?
An old friend I hadn’t talked to since childhood, as we were catching up on the ‘y...
- July 17, 2011
I was frustrated with a website that I was trying to use for work, so I started talking to it. My coworker, who is old enough to be my mom, joked that I should be sent to the loony bin. She doesn&...
- July 17, 2011
On a conference call with a client:
Client:: Aren’t you worried people will think you’re fags, you all talking on the phone together?
No, but I’m afraid that my client is a bigot. ...
- July 17, 2011
Are you co-workers? Are you best friends?
A regular at the yoga studio asked us, an inter-racial lesbian couple. We’ve been showing up together at every class for 4 months, even at 7am on the ...
- July 17, 2011
Ma’am, you have to wait with your own party! Excuse me, ma’am, you have to wait your turn!
I was with my boyfriend’s family waiting to eat breakfast with Cinderella in the castle a...
- July 16, 2011
I’m looking after a twelve year-old boy during out-of-school-hours-care. He points at a teddy bear that’s on top of a cupboard in a box of other toys and says ‘what’s with that...
- July 16, 2011
I’m all for women’s rights and freedom and whatever, as long as they still put out.
On a car ride home with a male friend; me, a teenage female feminist, sitting next to him. Made me fe...
- July 16, 2011
My grandmother and I are constantly arguing about my appearance and the way I dress myself; arguments about the way I conduct my life are few and far in between. She believes that I have low self este...
- July 16, 2011
I don’t mind that you don’t shave, but some of the parents and definitely the school administrator won’t like it. You should probably cover your legs.
My employer to me, a 25 year-...
- July 16, 2011
Is that a good idea? Well… you want to be careful, showing support openly like that. There are (whispers) predatory women.
My mother, when I (genderqueer, female-bodied) exclaimed happily that I w...
- July 16, 2011
Saw two types of teen-geared multivitamins at the drugstore today - both promoted a healthy immune system and other benefits. However, the “for her” box advertised “for healthy ski...
- July 16, 2011
Interview people in “non-traditional” families: gay, lesbian, single-parent, inter-racial, etc. Ask about their lives, including what makes their relationships work, and how others see th...
- July 15, 2011
I’m sitting in my boyfriend’s flat, listening to his flatmates talk. I count five jokes about rape in the first seven sentences after I sit down....
- July 15, 2011
We’re discussing the benefits of the Scandinavian-style welfare state. A liberal friend says, “Well, it’s a lot easier for them because their society is a lot more homogenous. You kn...
- July 15, 2011
When I’m out alone, shop clerks and charity solicitors and people looking for directions talk to me. When I’m out with my boyfriend, they only talk to him. I am 25 and female. Makes me f...
- July 15, 2011
My (previously awesome) uncle and I get in a fight about jokes about feminism, and he tells me to relax, because “everything’s not an episode of Glee.” He later tells me that I shoul...
- July 15, 2011
The grocery store near my house has a section in their hair-care aisle called “Ethnic Accessories” describing hair products designed for African American women. At a chain grocery store i...
- July 15, 2011
We’re not going near the drag queens!
A mother to her young daughter, at a GLBT pride parade and festival, in a generally GLBT-friendly town Awkward and sad that somebody would teach their chi...
- July 15, 2011
Anorexic girls should just eat.
As if it was a switch we could just flip....
- July 14, 2011
You better check to see who’s behind you before you bend over like that.
White mother warning her tween daughter who had bent over at the waist several feet in front of me, a black woman with ...
- July 14, 2011
California Milk Processor Board’s latest campaign to raise awareness of milk’s health benefits in reducing the symptoms of PMS, via Ms. Magazine....
- July 14, 2011
On Friday morning, as I walked to the cafe between classes at my predominantly white university, the school appointed photographer offered me a free coffee if I agreed to play the role of the cheerful...
- July 14, 2011
“Sexy,” a man says to me after I bend over in a supposedly low-cut top. When I tell him he’s making me feel uncomfortable, he replies, “You’re the one wearing that. If I ...
- July 14, 2011
Link: Slanted Magazine: Speak On It!
Slanted Magazine, an Asian Australian blog, has launched a project called Speak On It!, which collects stories and anecdotes of racial micro- and macroaggressio...
- July 14, 2011
We went to see the movie “Thor” last night. Nathalie Portman’s character hits Thor with her car twice. I am thinking it’s sort of refreshing that a female character can be a ba...
- July 14, 2011
For once, I feel beautiful and free and comfortable in my own skin. I smile as I walk down the path along the creek near the center of town, delighting in the feel of a warm breeze through my skirt, m...
- July 14, 2011
If I can’t get this, you guys definitely can’t!
From an older-teenage, male student, to myself (a female teacher’s aide who specializes in math) and a female teacher, referring to ...
- July 13, 2011
Does Bin Laden, due to the way he died, look more feminine to his followers and, thus, more ridiculous?
CNN interviewer consulting terrorism experts about Osama Bin Laden’s death Like my gende...
- July 13, 2011
So, which one of your parents is white?
This is asked or implied to me by white and Black folks alike on a regular basis. Since my complexion is fairly light, people automatically assume that I...
- July 13, 2011
My Drawing for Sequential professor shows us industry artists at the beginning of each class. 6 weeks in, and he still hasn’t shown a female artist. I asked him if he could change that, and ...
- July 13, 2011
A boy wouldn’t want a Dora the Explorer toothbrush!
At work in a call center. Made me feel angry, exasperated, powerless to say anything....
- July 13, 2011
Oh no I don’t go tanning because my mom says dark skin is really ugly!
17 year old black girl at school. Made me feel hurt, belittled, ugly....
- July 13, 2011
In one of my sessions today, a white student was wearing a shirt that said “Real American” on it. I am 22, May 2011, at college campus center. Made me feel alienated....
- July 12, 2011
I don’t want another woman boss. I already have a woman boss and she has me running around all the time.
A contractor who came into my office to install some fire extinguishers, during a casua...
- July 12, 2011
I’m attending a sexual harassment training and the white male facilitator of the training, who was eerily staring at me all day, approaches me. He says that I look like Courtney Thorne-Smith and...
- July 12, 2011
She really pisses me off…
Girl at my university professing her anger towards a 60-ish classmate of ours. The sexagenarian classmate is Native American/First Nations. The other student is upset...
- July 12, 2011
My friend refuses to agree that I’m Asian, even though I’m Indian. We went out to dinner and I mentioned something about being Asian, and she said, “If your eyes were like this, then...
- July 11, 2011
Acura is running a commercial that shows an attractive Black man being dressed in a suit. A car is shown followed by the announcer saying “Aggression has its elegance.” Bravo television, ...
- July 11, 2011
I went to a contra dance to get extra credit for my organic chemistry lab class. An elderly man asked me to dance, and upon introducing himself, he spoke to me in a foreign language. When I didn’...
- July 11, 2011
Do you girls have children yet? How old are you? Oh, well you will have them soon.
During a training to me and my female co-worker, both childless, while our male co-worker, who has a young child, w...
- July 11, 2011
I can tell you how to get a handicapped parking sticker, it’s so easy!
One classmate talking to another about the difficulties of finding parking on campus. My father is disabled and actuall...
- July 11, 2011
A group of White people and Black people are having a conversation and I’m involved.
The Black people walk away. The White people start saying racist things not realizing that I’m biracia...
- July 11, 2011
I hate to sound racist, but I think it’s because we have so many Chinese students here. These diseases all originate from pigs in China.
Customer at work talking to my co-workers and I about ...
- July 10, 2011
Link: Teacher Mocks Muslim Student After Osama Bin Laden's Death, Says 'I Bet You're Grieving'
...
- July 10, 2011
I don’t know why you insist on making chivalry so difficult.
A white man says to me with a smirk after I repeatedly refuse to walk through the door he went out of his way to hold for me and my...
- July 10, 2011
Me and a couple of friends were talking about sex, and I made a comment about positions on lesbian sex. They stopped smiling and looked at me funny, and the girl said: “Oh. I thought we were ta...
- July 10, 2011
But did he hold a gun to your head?
My therapist, after I (20 year-old woman) confided that my boyfriend had held me in a corner and sexually assaulted me. Made me feel frightened and confused, like...
- July 10, 2011
Why don’t you just dye your hair?
What friends would say to me during my school days as I got made fun of, beaten and bullied. From age 9 right up to 17 - Junior School right up to College; U...
- July 10, 2011
Oh come on, what kind of asian are you? Thats why you’re part of the team, to do the math.
Really? I thought it was because I was a beautiful animal. Calculus 2 my freshman year. I left, ende...
- July 9, 2011
You pretty much have to be a minority to get into Ivy Leagues.
White girl I just met explaining to a mutual Japanese friend the differences between getting into well known universities in Japan ver...
- July 9, 2011
When I posted on facebook that I couldn’t wear nail polish to work because I’m a man, my cousin commented: “Yeah well since I can’t be nude in public without a sexual harassm...
- July 9, 2011
When I visit my counselor and mention my girlfriend (I am female), he starts to talk about my queer identity. I ask him what that has to do with my anxiety. He says nothing. I hate when the mental hea...
- July 9, 2011
No, no, not that picture, we need to find one where the girl has more clothes on, she looks like she wants it.
Said by a female classmate to me when we were looking for graphics to illustrate our Po...
- July 9, 2011
An undergraduate student introduces me (38-year-old white, female tenured professor) to an older white, male professor from another department. The male professor has a shocked look when he learns I a...
- July 9, 2011
A question we received:
Can I (a white, non-Muslim person) submit a microaggression relating to the Islamophobia that is present at my predominantly white, Catholic/Protestant school?
The response ...
- July 8, 2011
I work on commission in a male-dominated electronics store, and I know exactly what I’m talking about. However, I will always get customers that either ask to talk to a man, or “Someone wh...
- July 8, 2011
Hey! You’re uncle died.
At Uni, walking to class. She was referring to Osama bin Laden, because I am Muslim. Made me feel like shyza, I remembered all the abuse I went through after 9-11....
- July 8, 2011
Dear friends and allies,
This project has always demanded a bit of time and, recently, a bit of funding as well. We are in the process of redesigning the website to make it more accessible & discu...
- July 8, 2011
My boyfriend (black) is about to walk into our apartment building. There is a young white woman walking ahead of him. She opens the door, looks back and sees him, and then quickly closes it in his...
- July 8, 2011
Oh my god, that’s a MAN.
High school student about my friend and countless other trans women. The teachers at our supposedly liberal, so-called alternative school ignored it every time....
- July 8, 2011
You’re a girl, go over there.
My teacher after I hesitated when the class was divided by “girl/boy.” I am genderqueer. Made me feel upset, lonely, and like I didn’t belong....
- July 8, 2011
On a British TV show called Exile: “She was a lesbian-before it was fashionable. I think she ran off with someone else’s wife.” The same woman later has her sexuality questioned beca...
- July 7, 2011
“You just bought a house in Auburn, really?” | Black man jailed for five days for trying to cash Chase check at Chase bank - King5.com...
- July 7, 2011
God, they should just shut up and be happy for me instead of making me feel guilty!
My sister, on her gay friend’s remorse that she gets to talk about her wedding registry on facebook and they...
- July 7, 2011
The number of people who congratulate me for “turning” my openly bisexual husband “back”. That is, if they like me, they congratulate me. If they don’t like me, they insi...
- July 7, 2011
Working at my dad’s office as a temp while he is out of state. The men who work here repeatedly refer to women as “chicks” and “skirts” and make jokes about violence agai...
- July 7, 2011
You’re going to take THAT home tonight?
A man said this to me as my girlfriend and I waited for a bus at night. I’m femme and she’s masculine-of-center and genderqueer. Made me f...
- July 7, 2011
Any video on YouTube where a majority of the comments is not in English, there will be at least one person bemoaning that fact and/or ordering everyone to speak English. Makes me feel like the interne...
- July 6, 2011
I am at Coldstone with two friends and both know that I am gay… a guy is dancing to Katy Perry song behind the counter. “Look at the guy dancing, he is gay right?” Because I am gay, ...
- July 6, 2011
Every single time I need to buy feminine products at the grocery store/pharmacy near my house, I have to literally get down on my knees as they are stocked near the floor. Standing back up, I can̵...
- July 6, 2011
I wasn’t sure if you were Oriental because your last name is Wong, but your first name is English.
Building manager/maintenance person (white man) of my apartment during our first in-person in...
- July 6, 2011
My boyfriend tells me he thinks that in some cases, rape victims are partially to blame for their rapes; for example if they didn’t take “enough” precautionary measures. I tell him h...
- July 6, 2011
I was tutoring a guy in his classes for a few weeks, but we seemed to be getting nowhere. Finally, after 45 minutes of struggling through second year university calculus, I asked him if he was havin...
- July 6, 2011
spandexanarchist:
Avon apparently thinks that people of color don’t exist, or otherwise they must not want people of color to be part of their consumer base....
- July 6, 2011
The best thing about you being gay is that you actually appreciate my shoes!
21 year old straight female friend after I, a 20 year old gay male, commented on her new shoes. The worst part is I felt...
- July 6, 2011
You just know she’s his mail-order bride.
Any coworker whenever a white, apparently Canadian-born man comes into the restaurant with a significant other who is eastern European or southeast As...
- July 5, 2011
A Korean American coworker is explaining her expertise on wigs and weaves as a result of working in her father’s corner store in rural Pennsylvana. All of the white coworkers crack jokes, fascin...
- July 5, 2011
What are you WEARING? You look like a dude!
My at the time boyfriend commenting on my jeans and flannel shirt. Usually I wear dresses and skirts. I felt so bad I just went home. A year ago when I we...
- July 5, 2011
Walking home from the bus stop, I see two young-ish (late teens, early 20s) guys coming towards me on the sidewalk. I look studiously at my phone because I already have a feeling that I am going to ...
- July 5, 2011
We are celebrating a friend’s birthday in a restaurant. I go outside for some fresh air with two friends. They are both Chinese and I am half Chinese, half White. While we are talking (in Englis...
- July 5, 2011
A coworker wanted to know why I looked so tired after a 12 hour shift on my feet. I explained to him that I have fibromyalgia and before I could explain that the condition makes me severely fatigued, ...
- July 5, 2011
At a wedding a guy tells me all about how gross it is that his gay couple friends had kids with two lesbians. He knew I was queer. Happened recently & made me feel unworthy, angry....
- July 4, 2011
Do you play basketball?
Strangers, all the time, in any location. Tall black kids can do more than play basketball....
- July 4, 2011
Don’t you want to get a man to carry that for you?
Most of the customers say this to me when I, a young, fairly strong woman, am carrying furniture out for them. Makes me feel insignificant, w...
- July 4, 2011
An older gay man asks me to explain what transgender means and then asks me if I am. I tell him I’m genderqueer and explain that too. He says “But are you a girl or a boy? I mean really,&#...
- July 4, 2011
Is it a boy or a girl?
Two fellow competitors waiting outside the ring at a martial arts tournament, openly speculating about my gender within earshot of me. One of them asks and I tell him what my ...
- July 4, 2011
Man, that test raped me!
...
- July 4, 2011
My boss (a white male) calls the only white male he supervises to ask his opinion about something because he feels like his opinion is a “good measure.”
Made me (a queer woman) feel underv...
- July 4, 2011
Wow, that’s so complicated. I bet you really want to get married soon so you can have an easier one!
A piano examination examiner to me about my “complicated” last name when I was ...
- July 3, 2011
I wonder how fast they had to run to steal those bags.
Two white gay men commenting on two gay black men who pass them wearing Prada and Chanel....
- July 3, 2011
“I hate cats,” said a male friend of mine. “They’re bitchy and distant and cold unless they want something from you. They’re like… girls.”...
- July 3, 2011
He seems so gay: he’s quiet, he likes poetry and he has a lisp. But you can never tell him I said this, because I don’t want to make him feel like there’s something wrong with him.
...
- July 3, 2011
Daddy, why is there a girl here?
A young boy to his father in the Baseball Hall of Fame in Cooperstown, New York. I am 16, female, and a huge baseball fan. Made me feel out of place, angry, and str...
- July 3, 2011
Last week at my mum’s birthday party my aunts would scowl and say “Don’t you want to go and play instead of eating so much?” whenever my 5 year old cousin took a new piece of c...
- July 3, 2011
I respond negatively to a white friend’s Facebook comment about two “toothless” black men on the train using the word “whitey” in conversation, making my friend feel like...
- July 3, 2011
I am often “mistaken” for a man. Two men were walking behind me at night. The only thing I could make out of their conversation was “Bitch! Bitch!” said loudly. Scared ...
- July 2, 2011
is there anything worse than a woman being hysterical for no reason?
Friend’s facebook status update....
- July 2, 2011
While talking to a girl I just met about racist people we’ve encountered during work, specifically the kind who feel comfortable telling you all their bigoted feelings without any prompting.
...
- July 2, 2011
You know how you’re black and you just have to live with it? That’s how I view my clumsiness. I just have to live with it!
An acquaintance, in trying to describe how clumsy she is. Made...
- July 2, 2011
I hope she’s pregnant and not just fat. Really not flattering.
My mom about a girl we saw on the street who looked about 14 or 15, wearing a form-fitting top that clung to her stomach. I̵...
- July 2, 2011
She’s not Black is she?
My boyfriend’s Filipino mother’s response when he told her he had a new girlfriend. Age 21 & made me angry....
- July 2, 2011
Wow, your daughter’s hair is beautiful. Is it all hers?
White stranger to my Black mother at a Bloomingdale’s when I was 4 years old. I was confused, and I had no idea why this angered m...
- July 1, 2011
On forms, there is always a box for heterosexual. There is always a box for homosexual. There is usually a box for bisexual. There is never a box for asexual. I don’t exist to the people...
- July 1, 2011
I pick up a heavy piece of marble to carry it outside to the car. My coworker insists on taking it from me. I pick up a box to follow him out and my boss immediately takes it from me.
They’re ...
- July 1, 2011
You’re not bisexual. Bisexuality doesn’t exist.
A close friend when I came out as bisexual at 19. It took guts after years of homophobia from my family. Made me feel speechless, ashamed,...
- July 1, 2011
At about 8 years old I was bickering with a boy and he said, “Why don’t you make me some chicken fried rice, chinita?” I am an ostracized Filipina who grew up in a predominantly Wes...
- July 1, 2011
You probably won’t send me anything I haven’t read before, and I did volunteer work in the multicultural center here in town so… unnecessary.
A close-ish friend from college during...
- July 1, 2011
Well maybe they wouldn’t bother you so much if you wore a bra.
My boss, in response to me complaining about a customer sexually harassing me. Put in my 2 weeks the next day. Made me feel like ...
- August 31, 2011
Seeing many maps of Manhattan that magically cut off right above 125th St (or 110th St), where the majority of the population is Black and Hispanic. Makes me feel erased. Like my neighborhood isn̵...
- August 31, 2011
My counselor suggested that I look in my university library for resources on living with ADHD. The library had only one serious book about adult ADHD, but almost a dozen on “the ADHD myth̶...
- August 31, 2011
Wow, what does your dad do?
In response to seeing my family’s (large) house. Both my parents are lawyers, but my mom is responsible for most of my family’s accumulated wealth. Makes me f...
- August 31, 2011
You can get the smaller one.
My grandmother to me, as my brother and I went to bring in two boxes from the car. I’m 21, female, and 147 pounds. My brother’s 17, and 125 pounds. I’m...
- August 31, 2011
This is not the way the only woman at the party should behave.
Whispered to me last night by a male acquaintance at a party. Everyone at the party works for the same very large male-dominated organi...
- August 31, 2011
Oh, that’s so cute. Is your boyfriend a tuba player?
High school teacher to me, wearing a tuba shirt (I am the only female tuba player in the district). Made me feel devalued and belittled. Fi...
- August 31, 2011
#fatpeoplenightmares
...
- August 30, 2011
It’d be so easy, you’re fourteen and girls already plays like teenagers.
Man at a chess club, not wanting to play against me. 2011. I felt belittled....
- August 30, 2011
Oh, I love the gays! I don’t know what I’ll do without my gay boyfriend!
Said by a group of heterosexual new coworkers of mine while I, a queer woman just now coming out of the closet, s...
- August 30, 2011
Today, a teenager asked me, during conversation about school, if i was born here. I wanted to say “No, my fluent English and American accent is just by chance…”
The worst part is, if...
- August 30, 2011
You’re so pretty! What are you mixed with?
The question I, a 19 year old black female (in NY of all places), always get when someone finds me attractive. As If I HAVE to be mixed because black...
- August 30, 2011
I work in a book store that sells mostly school supplies during the summer. While we were doing the setup for the new products this week, my boss kept talking about how he wants me to separate the ...
- August 30, 2011
I raped that test!
In high school. I asked, “Do you mean you did well or not?” …Apparently “to rape” can have openly positive connotations. Made me feel upset that such...
- August 30, 2011
Every single government form that I have ever had to fill out has required me to list either my father’s name or my husband’s name. It’s as if I have no right as a citizen without a ...
- August 30, 2011
I’m a manager in a call centre. As part of my job, I take over complaint calls from customers. One of my advisors called me over to take a complaint and finish a transaction for her customer, a ...
- August 29, 2011
While I was reading a fairly scientific magazine (print only, lots of footnotes, no colour) on the bus, a middle aged man sits next to me and tells me I “shouldn’t trouble (my) pretty litt...
- August 29, 2011
Well to be fair, the same thing can be said about me because I like weed. Only worse, because I can be arrested for it. The morale to the story is, stfu about personal stuff when you’re trying t...
- August 29, 2011
A man stared at me as I ate ice cream at a bus stop. Can’t I lick something without it being construed as sexual? 11 at night, bus stop. Made me feel angry, frightened, like I am merely an objec...
- August 29, 2011
I’m sitting with my friends on the beach. Some of us are fat. There are a lot of different gender presentations including people who are butch and genderqueer. The group next to us says loudl...
- August 29, 2011
I work for a Pre-Law department at my Jesuit University. We received information about the LGBT community in Law School. My boss tells me not to put it out because we don’t have to deal with ...
- August 29, 2011
Is your sister YOUR sister? And is she your moms real child? Her nose isn’t large and wide, like most black peoples. Is she mixed? etc.
I am 23 and this was at my workplace, when my mother and...
- August 29, 2011
I’m not going to screen you for STDs because you aren’t really at risk as a lesbian. But then again, I don’t really know how you people have sex.
An otherwise very nice and friendl...
- August 28, 2011
My grandfather wasn’t against the New York law for marriage equality but he didn’t feel it would have a real effect, since gay people just fool around and never commit.
I was 22, on a fami...
- August 28, 2011
If you girls have any experiences of your own to share in class, you’re welcome to.
My US History teacher talking to me and my friend (we’re both Hispanic), regarding immigration, which ...
- August 28, 2011
I ran into some guy friends from school a while ago. When I walked up to them, the subject of conversation quickly switched from homework to what I was wearing. My two friends decided to begin an in-d...
- August 28, 2011
You don’t have ADD. If you did, you wouldn’t have been able to do [thing I did].
Friends and family, when I mention that I have ADD....
- August 28, 2011
A classmate told me he “wished he was part of a marginalized community” so he could prove that minorities are always “bitching about nonsense.”He’s a white man from an af...
- August 28, 2011
I have never found ‘Where are you from?’ offensive and the asker wasn’t questioning your citizenship!
Commenters in response to Asian Americans talking about being questioned on &#...
- August 28, 2011
Well that’s ok—you’re a girl.
Guy’s reaction to me I saying didn’t like watching soccer at a bar. Made me feel like people expect me to constantly represent my entire &...
- August 28, 2011
Why do you watch your interpreter so much in class? You should try harder to listen to the other students when we have discussions… it’ll help improve your hearing, don’t you think?...
- August 27, 2011
It doesn’t make sense to consider street harassment ‘real’ harassment, or pretty soon men won’t even be able to talk to women without it being called sexism.
My dad. As someo...
- August 27, 2011
One neighbourhood has streets named after Native American nations (Mohawk, Seminole, etc.) and the one right next to it has streets named after individual white people (Mark Twain, Ralph Waldo Emerson...
- August 27, 2011
Maybe you just haven’t slept with the right man, I can turn you right, baby.
Man on the street after I tell him that I’m queer. As if my short skirt and make up give him the right to ass...
- August 27, 2011
I am a androgynous, transgendered college student though I normally present as my male birth gender.Frequently while walking around campus, I receive catcalls and horn-honks from straight men who mist...
- August 27, 2011
Every time I call the Dean’s office at my college and they assume my professor is a man....
- August 27, 2011
Konichiwa!
5 or 6 year old white boy to me, a 52 year old Asian American woman. At a museum in California....
- August 27, 2011
Umm… are your parents home?
Heard nearly every time I answer the door to my house, from door-to-door salesmen or other people I don’t personally know. I’m petite and half-Asian. ...
- August 26, 2011
Why isn’t there a white history month?
My white friend at school, sometime this past year. My other friend and I tried to explain to her why that wouldn’t be appropriate (i.e. when you&#...
- August 26, 2011
When I was 8, my mom told me and my brother that there was no possible way that either of us could be gay because it’s a genetic trait passed down through the mom’s side and she didn’...
- August 26, 2011
Hey honey, you’re going the wrong direction, the border’s that way!
Said by a white man of at least thirty to a 3 year old Latina girl at a restaurant as she was heading to the bathroom....
- August 26, 2011
I work in tech support and every time I get a call where the first thing the caller says is “Are you tech support?” or “I’m looking for tech support.” I feel like I don&#...
- August 26, 2011
My class was discussing a book of Chicana literature, talking about the audience being Hispanic Americans. My white male teacher interrupts, asking: “Yeah, but do they read?” The entire cl...
- August 25, 2011
I am a deaf man and was at a get-together with my boyfriend at one of his coworker’s houses. During dinner they decided to turn on the TV. I asked if there were captions on the show and nobody w...
- August 25, 2011
Father Daughter Talk …My daughter just walked into the room and said, “Dad, cancel my allowance, rent my room out, throw all my clothes out, take my TV, iPhone, IPod, and my laptop. Please...
- August 25, 2011
When my boyfriend’s siblings begin telling rape jokes and expect me to find them funny. When my boyfriend himself sometimes casually uses rape in regards to video games or daily life. I am 19, i...
- August 25, 2011
It’s not that I don’t like him; it’s just that… I think he has Asperger’s or something. He always does awkward stuff like pacing around. It’s really weird.
Classm...
- August 25, 2011
I think modern medicine is stupid. It’s causing overpopulation problems because people aren’t dying quickly enough.
My boyfriend. I’m an insulin-dependent diabetic who takes “...
- August 25, 2011
Oh no, we won’t get anything done today, too many hormones.
An elderly white man upon walking into a writing workshop in Chicago and seeing several female-bodied people in the room. I am 19. J...
- August 25, 2011
My history professor is talking about slavery. He asks us what emotions we think the slaves felt upon being released. A white girl says, “I think they felt scared because they had to take care o...
- August 25, 2011
Walking down the street, an older man said hello. After hearing my hello in return, he said “That’s a good girl.” My boyfriend was walking with me and he didn’t say anything. ...
- August 24, 2011
Are you on your period or something?
Whenever any woman shows the slightest hint of annoyance or irritation. Makes me feel like people will never take me seriously when I have something negative to ...
- August 24, 2011
An older white man came into my office to meet with the head publisher and was introduced to me, because I’ll probably be helping to edit his book later on. He said. “My, aren’t you ...
- August 24, 2011
I need to know: are you looking for a career, or are you looking to get married?
My boss, during a discussion on whether the company should pay for me to get a master’s degree. I am 24, in a l...
- August 24, 2011
You’re going to be the expert on all things African American.
White professor said to me (20 year old mixed race woman). In a college pop culture class. I was upset. embarrassed. vulnerable....
- August 24, 2011
Link: Privilege Checking Resource
A great blog for links to resources about various types of social privilege. If you’re ever confused about types of privileges, this is a great place to star...
- August 24, 2011
My (younger, 16-year-old) sister subscribes to Seventeen Magazine, and I’ll skim it when she’s done. I may see a “shock” story about a gay or trans teen, or a single page about...
- August 24, 2011
I’m not going to hug you. You didn’t lose weight…If you want a hug from me next time, lose weight!
A family friend who hadn’t seen me in a while, after hugging my mom. Happy ...
- August 24, 2011
When I told my friends that I picked Spanish as my elective, they started making jokes about how now I’ll be a “real Mexican” and I’ll probably pronounce things in a “whi...
- August 24, 2011
And don’t even get me started on the fact that only binary genders are available....
- August 24, 2011
I am a female college student. When I visit my family over school breaks, my father and I take turns walking our two large dogs. My dad and I are both physically strong and have had dogs since childho...
- August 23, 2011
Just smile more.
Doctor’s advice, upon me admitting I have severe depression and suffering work stress. I am a 22 year old female working 60+ hours a week. Made me feel invalidated, patronised...
- August 23, 2011
I was walking down the street yesterday with my bike. A stranger walking in the opposite direction joked, “Is my food ready?” I’m a Chinese American male. The joke might have been fu...
- August 23, 2011
I mean, he’s so rich and powerful, why would he even risk having sex with a *maid*?
Woman standing in front of me at the grocery store, on why she didn’t think Dominique Strauss-Kahn rap...
- August 23, 2011
Did you beat up your boyfriend or something? *wink*
Man commenting on the fact I use a cane. I reply, “No, I’m permanently disabled,” and his face falls. Made me feel as though you...
- August 23, 2011
I’m in charge of enforcing the phone policy at work. My coworkers call me the “Phone Nazi.” The actual, non-phone Nazis drove my grandparents from their homes and killed their famili...
- August 23, 2011
My friends and I are planning to go to the Harry Potter movie dressed in costume. Before I could say a word about what I wanted to wear, one girl pointed at me and said, “And you’re goin...
- August 23, 2011
I’m on an independent research grant trying to finish my senior thesis and at a difficult point in my work. Today, I had multiple men make kissy noises at me on the street, interrupt my academ...
- August 22, 2011
At the fabric store where I work, the printed cottons are separated by “Girls’ Novelty” and “Boys’ Novelty.” The “boy” fabrics have baseballs and cowboy...
- August 22, 2011
I work at a vegetarian restaurant and a white woman at a table I was waiting on started speaking to me in really bad Spanish. I was really confused because I had clearly taken everyone else’s ...
- August 22, 2011
Every time I’m at a party or family gathering where the genders segregate into separate groups, I’m automatically left with the women while the men go and do the activities I’d prefe...
- August 22, 2011
Yeah, it’s like when black people dye their hair blonde and wear neon colors. It just doesn’t work!
...
- August 22, 2011
Look at the color of your skin! You should know Spanish!
My coworker after a patient came in speaking Spanish....
- August 22, 2011
It’s only happened to you like two times.
My boyfriend’s response when I was trying to tell him how anxious I feel being stopped, questioned and asked to present my papers by the police ...
- August 22, 2011
Don’t pick that up, you’re a girl. Let one of the boys do that.
My boss, to a female coworker picking up a box. By “one of the boys” he meant me. She is a strong lady wh...
- August 21, 2011
You’re actually very pretty. Most dark skinned girls don’t have your looks.
I was 15. It made me feel as though my skin isn’t worthy of being considered beautiful....
- August 21, 2011
I’m teaching summer school for middle school students in Washington Heights. My male students are lying on a couch next to each other. My assistant principal walks in and says, “What are...
- August 21, 2011
As a genderqueer person, I always dread signing up on new websites, and try to avoid the ones that ask for a gender and only offer two options.
Prior to Pottermore’s early opening, I scoured the...
- August 21, 2011
Let me guess … you’re here for passport photos, right?
An employee of a photo processing store to my father as he walks in with my younger brother and me. Frustratingly enough, we are th...
- August 21, 2011
Today, I was arguing with a male friend of mine about an incident that happened a few days ago in which a man made kissing noises at me late at night when I was walking down a dark street with heavy g...
- August 20, 2011
I seriously doubt all non-sexual claims.
My friend, after I told him I am asexual. He thought I was gay and wouldn’t believe me. Made me feel angry, invalidated, sad, invisible. Like it’...
- August 20, 2011
Wow, you’re just all around evil, aren’t you.
Guy in my class after finding out that my dad is Muslim and my mom is German....
- August 20, 2011
So are you a full-time lesbian now, or just bi?
One of my friends after I cut my hair very short. 21, sorority sister. Made me feel stereotyped, pressured, worried that my sorority sisters will be u...
- August 20, 2011
Earlier today I was walking down the street alone in a dangerous neighborhood when a police van drove by me. The cop in the passenger seat leaned out the window, checked me out, and shouted “Hi ...
- August 20, 2011
I know you’re a lesbian, but why do you have to be so masculine?
My mother, after I came out to her as bisexual (and explained several times that I’m not a lesbian). Made me feel erased,...
- August 20, 2011
It’s too bad you’ll never have kids, since you’re a lesbian.
My mother....
- August 20, 2011
Looking through a booklet of sex positions in the bookstore, I couldn’t help but notice that all of the people demonstrating the positions were straight and white. Makes me feel unacknowledged, ...
- August 19, 2011
You speak English really well for someone that’s an immigrant. You don’t even sound Hispanic.
A lot of people on various occasions. Makes me feel disrespected and confused as to what wha...
- August 19, 2011
Hey! HEY! Why do you look like a boy?
A kid who could not have been more than 9 or 10, staring at me as I sat on a swing set in the park near my apartment. Made me afraid, unhappy, wondering what ki...
- August 19, 2011
Sometimes when discussing relationships, I will ask “Are you straight?” if it hasn’t been specified but could help me know more about them. Half the time, the person I’m talkin...
- August 19, 2011
I wish you didn’t have to miss out on dating boys. Boys are fun.
My mother....
- August 19, 2011
You wouldn’t have really gone without him or another boy with you, right?
My mother, after telling her about a walk I had taken with one of my male friends to the local store after running int...
- August 18, 2011
Nivea beauty ad: “Look like you give a damn. Re-civilize yourself.” reblogged from black girl with long hair....
- August 18, 2011
maverynthia:
Back of Ruffles Molten Hot Wings chips bag. I guess women don’t eat spicy wings and are only “personal cheerleaders” for men that do.
...
- August 18, 2011
Every time someone asks me if I have a boyfriend, it makes me feel like my sexual and romantic identity is invalid, and it makes me afraid of how they would react if I have a partner that is not male....
- August 18, 2011
You haven’t seen the Godfather movies?! You are not really a man if you haven’t seen them.
My roommate while studying abroad in Italy. I’m a 18 year old bisexual male. Made me feel...
- August 18, 2011
Those things are terrible, but you really just have to ignore them. Just let it go and it will go away on its own.
A longtime friend, when I ranted about something damagingly transphobic in the car...
- August 17, 2011
So are you still bi? What does Evan think? You’d better not put that on your facebook profile, ok? And don’t say anything to your dad.
My mom, a few times a year since I came out to her ...
- August 17, 2011
Female clothing on Hanna Anderson, a kids clothing site, described as ‘Not Old Enough For A Boyfriend” and “Not So Skinny Jeans.” Boys? “5 Pocket Jeans.”
Made me fe...
- August 17, 2011
You have to wonder if, in his heart of hearts, he knows what he’s doing is wrong.
My dad comments on Neil Patrick Harris speaking about his marriage in an interview on TV. In my heart of heart...
- August 17, 2011
During a team meeting, a coworker mentions he is going to Japan to study. The lead programmer tells him he should start a database of all the hot Japanese girls who are sure to flock to a white man li...
- August 17, 2011
Oh, that’s so sweet; I was a feminist when I was your age, too.
My current boss at my job interview for a position at an all-girls’ educational institution. I should have seen that as a ...
- August 17, 2011
My partner (man) and I (woman) go to the hardware store to get supplies. I say, “this looks like what we need,” and he ignores me until he reaches the same conclusion. We double-check with...
- August 17, 2011
My university lecturer explains psychoanalytic ideas used (still) in literary criticism, including Freud’s ideas of the Oedipus Complex and anal fixation - he considered homosexuality an infanti...
- August 16, 2011
Though you can pick a male or female trainer for both, the Wii Fit menu shows the male trainer for strength exercises and the female for yoga....
- August 16, 2011
At Quiz Time during the diversity training workshop, our objective: match the practice with the appropriate cultural/ethnic/religious group. We discuss the Chinese belief that it’s bad luck to g...
- August 16, 2011
When talking about an ex of mine, I mentioned that his next partner after me was a woman. A friend of my brother first asks if my ex-boyfriend is bi and then says that he’s sorry to hear that an...
- August 16, 2011
All right! I just raped my electrical engineering exam!
A friend of my boyfriend’s. Angry and upset, that somebody would equate rape and success....
- August 16, 2011
Doing a Physics degree is no way to get yourself a husband!
From the woman at the next table that we fell into conversation with at a restaurant. After she said this, I fell out of the conversation ...
- August 16, 2011
That’s my girl!
Said to me by an almost complete stranger after I handed him a beer at a company BBQ. It made me feel like a trained dog....
- August 16, 2011
The abuse that fat people receive is terrible. Instead of insulting them, we need to teach them how to eat and exercise properly, for the sake of their health!
Almost every so-called ‘progress...
- August 15, 2011
What’s she got that stick for if she can read [that book]?
I’m 23. I’m partially sighted and use a white mobility cane. This happened in a train station waiting room, late at night...
- August 15, 2011
Every time someone questions my ability to speak Spanish because I’m “too light” or because I’ve lived in the U.S. all my life. I was born to Mexican immigrants and Spanish was...
- August 15, 2011
Are you enjoying your vacation in the United States?
I’m 17, in 2008, at the local Wal-Mart. I had been living in the United States since I was about five but people still assume that because ...
- August 15, 2011
Wow, you eat so healthy!
Said to me, a 21 year old overweight, recovering anorexic. Made me feel appalled that people believe if you’re overweight, you’re an unhealthy eater. It’s ...
- August 15, 2011
The debt crisis and “The Lord of the Rings” both have elaborate plots, too many characters to keep track of, and talking about either of them repels girls.
The description of The Colbert...
- August 15, 2011
Oh, those guys were just trying to holler at you!
My friend, in response to me telling him that while walking to his house, three young men harassed me for while I walked down the block. Upon arri...
- August 14, 2011
My girlfriend’s profile on a forum says that she’s “cuddling my girlfriend”. Someone felt the need to send her a message with the assumption that it was a typo. Made me feel ma...
- August 14, 2011
My health class in high school was assigned to write a research paper on a health topic of our choice, but we had to get it approved by our teacher. When I pitched him my idea, he didn’t dismiss...
- August 14, 2011
Link: "I'm not racist but that just doesn't sound right."
In response to the new half black half Latino Spiderman. From the notracistbut Tumblr....
- August 14, 2011
Hahaha, you’re so funny! You’re not asexual! There’s no such thing! Humans are MADE for sex! You just haven’t had GOOD sex yet! Someday you’ll meet the right guy and you&...
- August 14, 2011
Twitter | Please tweet your microaggressions! Tag them #microaggression, and we’ll retweet as many as we can. Microaggressions happen everywhere, all the time - let’s make this project tru...
- August 14, 2011
Delta Airlines represents flight attendants on its digital displays with a female icon. Via Sociological Images....
- August 14, 2011
I had been emailing my doctor to arrange a prescription for collection, and I mentioned that I would get my girlfriend to pick it up - the doctor replied to point out that “my friend” woul...
- August 14, 2011
Is the kids’ meal for a boy or a girl?
At most fast food restaurants that offers kids’ meals, in reference to whether the toy included should be a “boy toy” or a “gir...
- August 14, 2011
Racism is bad, but every stereotype has some truth.
A friend of a friend, as I’m discussing institutionalized racism....
- August 14, 2011
That haircut is usually cute on punk and goth girls, but you should have kept the bangs in the front. It’s more feminine.
A patron of the bar I was working at. I was 22 at the time, a queer pe...
- August 13, 2011
I registered to play tennis with a friend at the Massachusetts Institute of Technology’s courts and these guys in front of us won’t leave. After we politely remind them that we’re wa...
- August 13, 2011
The man sitting in the seat opposite me on the commute train in London gets addressed as ‘sir’ while I get addressed as ‘my dear’ by the male train worker serving snacks from t...
- August 13, 2011
Would you like a newspaper, young lady?
Newspaper subscription salesman stationed at a store entrance. I am a 31 year-old female. He appeared to be in his 30s or 40s as well. Made me feel like even ...
- August 13, 2011
My boyfriend’s grandmother, who lives in Arizona, made a scholarship. The student that won it is Latino (or at least presumed to be). This upset his grandmother because the student “may be...
- August 13, 2011
Girls run away from their families for two different reasons. Either they’re chasing after something, or they’re running away from something.
A quote from the Dr. Phil show, July 20, 201...
- August 13, 2011
In class today we had to split up into same-sex (i.e. male or female) groups to discuss gender stereotypes. I am male-bodied and genderqueer and I didn’t want to self-segregate into a group that...
- August 13, 2011
The bartender gave the tab to my boyfriend, even though I had my credit card out ready to pay for both of us. We usually take turns paying when we go out as we make the same amount of money. Made me f...
- August 12, 2011
You can move the printers next week. You’ll need to get some strong guys from the lab to move them.
Male university tech support worker, to me and my fellow lab assistant, both female. I lift...
- August 12, 2011
I was working at my retail job when I overheard a woman swearing about one of my coworkers. She was talking about how stupid my coworker was, which was why she was working minimum wage behind a regist...
- August 12, 2011
I’m listening to a promo on the radio in my car for an HIV vaccine study. They are looking for healthy gay men to take part in the study. Not once do they mention that participants need to be HI...
- August 12, 2011
Are you normal?
My father asked me this when he found out I was sharing an apartment with two girls and not dating them. I am a gay male. Made me feel: sad and afraid of how he would react if I were...
- August 12, 2011
Is your dog Oriental, too?
My neighbor said this to my two roommates as we were all coming in after walking her dog together. We were the only Asian American tenants in the entire building. Shocked,...
- August 12, 2011
I’m walking back to my apartment in the middle of the day in a neighborhood with very few Asian people when a stranger calls out, “Ni hao” at me. When I ignore him, he says, “I...
- August 11, 2011
At a pub in Cambridge, I’m asked for ID for the first time in the 2 years I’ve been in the UK. The old white lady at the counter asked me to show “whatever card you used to get into ...
- August 11, 2011
We don’t consider you an American. You don’t act or think like all the other domestic students.
International Student to me as a compliment. I’m 24 and in an MBA program in the US ...
- August 11, 2011
I like to imagine you as a girl but your sentence structure and rhetoric is so concise and to the point which points to the contrary (nothing against women, simply factual).
Things like this keep sh...
- August 11, 2011
That’s why I’m not a lesbian.
Pre-teen girl says to her friend within my earshot, as I (a butch/genderqueer lesbian in board shorts) walk by at the beach. At the beach, June 2011. Made m...
- August 11, 2011
Gentlemen: This Foundation has awarded a Scholarship Grant…
Copy of a letter a scholarship foundation sent to my university notifying them of my award. Made me feel like even though I’m ...
- August 11, 2011
Unless [female student] complains about his flirting, there’s nothing I can do.
My male professor when I (female) complained about a male classmate repeatedly and publicly propositioning a fem...
- August 11, 2011
I was told that I was lucky not to be pretty because then I wouldn’t be catcalled....
- August 11, 2011
What is that smell? Is that Chinese food? How can you stand that? We have to air the room out!
I am Chinese. The food didn’t even belong to me. Ironically, the professor has written about r...
- August 10, 2011
After applying for a new apartment, its appointed real estate agent called my (male) partner instead of me (female) to negotiate the lease and rent. But from day one, I had taken the lead in looking f...
- August 10, 2011
My husband mentions in conversation that while we’ve decided not to make a baby we may later choose to adopt. What’s the first response from more than one person at the table? “Just ...
- August 10, 2011
While putting menus down for a table at the restaurant I work at, one of the white French-Canadian men says, “Where are you from? China? Korea? Japan?” I am thrown off and distracted because his f...
- August 10, 2011
I want to take a taxi to the airport so I don’t have to drive when I’m tired. My mom does not want me taking a taxi by myself because I would be alone with a strange man. Apparently army h...
- August 10, 2011
God made Adam and Eve, not Adele and Eve.
A friend of a friend said this to me at a dinner party, with reference to me being openly bi and Catholic. Female, mid-twenties, UK. She pretended she was j...
- August 10, 2011
Your hair isn’t a disaster, but you looked so much prettier with longer hair!
Many of my classmates following my haircut at which I cut off my long feminine locks for a shorter androgynous loo...
- August 10, 2011
Link: "But you're my boy, though"
From new film Gun Hill Road, the story of a family in transition, with transwoman lead actress Harmony Santana....
- August 9, 2011
Don’t become one of those militant gay people.
My straight, liberal mother when I told her I plan to join LGBT youth groups next year. I’m 20 years old. Made me feel invalidated, confuse...
- August 9, 2011
I tell a guy that I’m not interested in dating him and he continues to pursue me calling me “honey” and “sweetheart.” I tell him that he’s making me uncomfortable u...
- August 9, 2011
Link: You're not a stranger to riots yourself? You have taken part of them?
BBC reporter “interviewing” black London grandfather/journalist/activist Darcus Howe about the riots....
- August 9, 2011
I’m a queer woman. At my brother’s wedding, some of the bride’s family have bumper stickers supporting the state’s same-sex marriage ban. I don’t know which of her relati...
- August 9, 2011
I have been repeatedly asked by students’ parents if I am married or have children. When I answer no, they ask how old I am, as if time is ticking. Colleagues also frequently ask when I’m ...
- August 9, 2011
While researching the duties of people involved in various levels of government, I notice that every official’s pronoun is male. “His duties include…” “He has the power...
- August 9, 2011
When you get married your surname will be Asian. That’s fucked up.
A student I tutor after finding out that I am a white girl dating an Asian guy. He doesn’t understand when I try to exp...
- August 8, 2011
Listening to the radio in Perth, Australia on the way home from work, an ad comes on for a company that sells work clothes and safety gear: “You have to go shopping for new boots, but you don...
- August 8, 2011
I’m walking through airport security in New York. My mother is ahead of me, and two male security guards start to tell her to go through the new x-ray machines. When they see me, they smile, sto...
- August 8, 2011
A coworker mixes up the names of me and another coworker. We are not in the same department category, we look nothing alike, and the person I am mistaken for is old enough to be my mother. The only th...
- August 8, 2011
Wouldn’t you rather have the princesses than Captain America?
A young woman to her under-five daughter, looking at the balloons at the grocery store. Made me sad, for myself and for the little...
- August 8, 2011
That’s a little inappropriate for a boy, don’t you think?
My grandmother, referring to the fact that my 6-year-old brother listens to Lady Gaga with me. Made me feel scared, angry. Becau...
- August 8, 2011
I Googled you. Why on earth do you have a Japanese girlʻs name if you donʻt look Japanese?!
Written to me (mixed race woman graduate student) in a professional e-mail from a white male colleague I...
- August 8, 2011
I have a great new job opportunity where I would be making a higher salary than my boyfriend and I think he’s a little jealous. He said, “Of course you’ll get it - you’re a hot...
- August 8, 2011
You want to say ‘mi novia’. If you say ‘mi novio’ it sounds like you have a boyfriend.
My Spanish professor....
- August 7, 2011
Washington Redskins. It would be offensive, but there’s not enough Indians left for it to be offensive to.
...
- August 7, 2011
Submission on College Humor, captioned: “i only came here for a gallon of milk, but why not? I eventually need to get that hedge trimmed.”
...
- August 7, 2011
After stating that I am bisexual, I am told “yeah, all girls are.” I say that I would have probably noticed, having a rather vested interest in the matter. The response: “But my girl frien...
- August 7, 2011
Why don’t you fax him a picture of yourself? I’m sure he’ll get that memo to you faster.
A male colleague, when I tell him his co-worker has not yet faxed me the memo I requested. ...
- August 7, 2011
A college professor takes away 10 points from my oral presentation because I am not “professionally dressed”. I am here with limited possessions from a state that is 3,000 miles away. I am on ...
- August 7, 2011
During my freshman year of high school, the administrators pulled all of the Asian kids out of class and made us take an English proficiency test. At first we thought it was a joke, but sitting at...
- August 6, 2011
I sought treatment for depression during my junior year at an Ivy League school. My off-campus therapist suggested that I transfer to a community college because he had a hard time “imagining me o...
- August 6, 2011
Me: As a kid, I got asked a lot if I was a boy or a girl.Friend: Oh, how mean! But you weren’t that ugly as a kid!
I really can’t make the connection between gender-dubious and unattractive.
...
- August 6, 2011
A screencap from Fox Nation on August 5, 2011....
- August 6, 2011
And who is this lovely exotic young lady over here?
old white woman at a dinner party....
- August 6, 2011
You know, Obama may have black skin, but he was basically raised white.
A manager at my company, discussing President Obama with several of my coworkers....
- August 6, 2011
When did your father leave home? I think you have problems with male authority because your father isn’t around.
My boss, concerning my (dead) father....
- August 6, 2011
Can I tell them??!! She’s a lesbian too!
my friend while introducing me to a queer female couple at a party....
- August 5, 2011
But you’re too YOUNG to have arthritis!
Stranger at restaurant, to me, after seeing my hand braces and asking why I had them....
- August 5, 2011
I really don’t understand why you are so invested in women’s rights and fighting sexism and stuff - these things clearly don’t affect you.
A male friend about my job as an editor at our univer...
- August 5, 2011
While working at a home improvement store over a break from college, a white woman comes into to the store and demands to speak to someone who is knowledgeable about garden insecticides. I, a young La...
- August 5, 2011
Every time I go out to eat or get drinks with my boyfriend, the servers give the check to him, even though I am always the one to ask for the check. My salary is considerably higher than his, so when ...
- August 5, 2011
Well, won’t you make a good wife some day.
Said by a regular customer while I was sweeping the floor at work. As though my ability of being a good wife depends on how well I do chores. Made m...
- August 5, 2011
There are some funny women, but even on the stand-up circuit, where there’s no one casting anything, women are not proportionally as funny [as men].
From a female friend with whom I went to gr...
- August 4, 2011
I am currently working part time and studying at the same time. I do not get a lot of free time. When I told my flatmate that I was not sure if my relationship with my boyfriend was stable enough to g...
- August 4, 2011
Dress code for Brothers Bar in Madison, WI. Via Sociological Images....
- August 4, 2011
You were born with white skin, like your dad’s. You’re so lucky. It’s too bad you didn’t get his blue eyes, though. Maybe you’ll pass them on to your kids!
I was born t...
- August 4, 2011
I am working at my minimum wage job, wearing long pants even though it is extremely hot out. I am sweating and my face is bright red. My manager approaches me and says “You’re sweating lik...
- August 4, 2011
You know, you’re really cute for an over-sized girl.
Friend of my ex. As if my size were a hinderance to me dating. I was the ONLY attractive fat girl that he knew of. I sobered up quickly aft...
- August 4, 2011
On the first day of my 10th grade PE class, the teacher informs my class that girls can’t play sports, so we should all expect to receive low marks. However, he thoughtfully reassures us that it...
- August 4, 2011
You like hip-hop, don’t you?
During a job interview with an older, white, cismale employer to me, a young, black-mixed, ciswoman. It made me feel really stereotyped, annoyed, trapped (I need...
- August 4, 2011
Talking to my white mum about how I felt weird-looking because of being mixed race-like I was the ‘exotic’ thing that it took effort to like, not like the pretty, ordinary, monoracial whit...
- August 4, 2011
Let me guess, nursing?
Said by the late-middle-aged man in charge of assigning me a job when I joined the Army. I was 17 and female. I had intended to become a translator, but was so blindsided and ...
- August 3, 2011
I’m at my brother’s school fair, and I’m sitting next to a woman who’s talking to her friend. She points out a child at the school, a probably-cis-male kid holding a “fem...
- August 3, 2011
Don’t you wish you had a normal, English name like Jane Smith?
My tenth grade math teacher after making me spell my name out....
- August 3, 2011
Almost every time I go into a video game store, comic book store, or the fantasy/sci-fi section of the bookstore, the sales associate asks me if I’m buying a gift for my boyfriend. When I tell t...
- August 3, 2011
In a graduate psychology textbook on dream analysis, a section describes a (I’m assuming white) female patient who dreamed of a black male waving her towards him. That’s it. The textbook&#...
- August 3, 2011
After letting my white friend and his whole family move in with me after they lost their house, he’s describing a house he looked at to rent… ”and the best thing about it, everyone...
- August 3, 2011
The yoga studio was below a law office and the click of high-heeled shoes could be heard as the last of us were leaving the change room. “That secretary’s shoes are so noisy!” scoffe...
- August 3, 2011
Bisexual is a term that gay guys in high school use when they want to hold hands with girls and feel like a normal person for a change.
The character Kurt on the show ‘Glee.’ This made ...
- August 2, 2011
As a white girl on the soccer team said I was the only Asian on the team, two other biracial girls spoke up in outrage of being ignored (they’re both half Asian). In response, the white girl sai...
- August 2, 2011
Don’t worry, the neighbors are really nice and they won’t think anything about your furniture…
Landlord, reassuringly, knowing we were working-class. I was in my 40s, early 2000s...
- August 2, 2011
Freshman year of college at a private university. I’m crying because I just lost a grant and I’m deeply concerned about my ability to pay for the rest of the semester. I’m telling my...
- August 2, 2011
How do you spell margarita?
Being the only Latino male at my job, I figured my white co-worker just thought I would know how to spell it....
- August 2, 2011
Oh he’s very nice. He’s so intelligent and always happy and smiling, and very professional. (pause) He’s black, you know.
My supervising teacher, in a conversation about a superior...
- August 2, 2011
Look at her she came back even lighter from Europe!
My neighbor said this upon seeing me after my semester abroad in Ireland. I’m a light skinned and freckled Hispanic woman. It made me feel...
- August 1, 2011
I’ve always wanted to do female-oriented entertainment. I’ve always related to women more than guys… I watched a ton of romantic comedies.
Quote from Paul Feig, director of Bridesmaids. In the...
- August 1, 2011
Maybe this is racist, but can I borrow some Wite-Out?
Coworker whom I’ve had to talk to about actual racism in the past. Made me feel belittled - he’d rather make fun of the concept of r...
- August 1, 2011
I’m in San Francisco on high school choir tour. We go to Chinatown for the day, and several of my classmates start talking in high-pitched, fake Chinese: “ching chong,” etc. When I t...
- August 1, 2011
I just called you in here to let you know that we don’t tolerate any kind of shenanigans from your kind here.
My principal to me on my first day of school, outside of class. I was seven. My fa...
- August 1, 2011
You need to look at Technical Schools. You don’t come from the right family background to go to college.
My high school guidance counselor to me, a 16 year old Native American female from a si...
- August 1, 2011
Yeah, but you’re not like most of them. You’re smart & a hard worker.
Store Manager to me, during a cashier hiring process after saying “We can’t hire her. She’s In...
- August 1, 2011
You don’t look autistic.
Various people. Completely invalidates all of the hard work I’ve put into appearing “normal”. If only they had a clue what it was like. The sensory ...
- September 30, 2011
When I was little, my aunts always gave me Barbies even though they knew I disliked dolls. Now they give me make-up and chick lit hoping that I’ll “grow up” and stop being a “t...
- September 30, 2011
Maybe you’re just not really a lesbian.
My sister, when I told her about a bad experience I had with a girl. I’m a 20-year-old woman from the UK. Made me feel invalidated, doubtful, ash...
- September 30, 2011
Hey Fellow,[blah blah blah]Take care, Sir!
The salutation and closing of an email I got in response to a craigslist ad in the Musical Instruments section. I had posted a want to buy ad that said ̶...
- September 30, 2011
In Sephora I asked a woman to help me find a nude shade of lipstick for myself. She brought a pale beige color and the other resembling a white person’s skin. When i asked her that I wanted one ...
- September 30, 2011
25 job applications done. 0 responses. being a white male in the 21st century sucks.
Facebook status. I am glad to see that the first comment “excuse me?” got five likes....
- September 30, 2011
I have to admit I am relieved you’re not taking it all the way to becoming female - I think that would have been an adjustment I’d have a great deal of difficulty making.
My mother, when...
- September 29, 2011
“You look pretty today. What a pretty smile you have. Awww, and it looks like you have some work to do.” A fellow customer, a man in his 50s, at the hardware store, on looking at me and th...
- September 29, 2011
A WOMAN ON A MOTORCYCLE?!! HAHAHAHAHA!
Shouted out to me by a male passerby as I was pumping gas into my Ninja. I just laughed at him. People that are that ignorant aren’t worth my anger or hu...
- September 29, 2011
I am of both European and Middle Eastern descent. If I don’t look “too Arab,” then I get to be Caucasian/white. My partner says things like “Your people aren’t white!R...
- September 29, 2011
I’m taking a film photography course at my college. In the dark room while developing film, these two other girls were in there as well. One girl turns to the other and says, “you look d...
- September 29, 2011
While we’ve defined “microaggressions” in our About and FAQ, it’s sometimes difficult to categorize every submission we receive. We sometimes slip up on our own definitions and...
- September 29, 2011
My grandfather forwards me an email called “Classes for Women Taught By Men” and I’m foolish enough to open it. It features gems such as :
Up in Winter, Down in Summer -How to A...
- September 28, 2011
public boolean isGirlCute(){if(isComputerScienceGirl()){return false;}…}
I see waaaay too many jokes like this on Facebook about the lack of “attractive computer science girls.” I ...
- September 28, 2011
Oh, you’re not like our other Indian colleague. You’re light skinned, you’re okay. They just talk about how brown they are.
Chinese-Singaporean colleague of Han descent. At work in a school in...
- September 28, 2011
You’re really un-intimidating for a black guy.
Said by white male. I am a freshman in college. Made me feel as though I should be intimidating because I’m black....
- September 28, 2011
I’m the only woman in the engineering department at a U.S. manufacturing facility. I walk into a meeting after repairing a machine in our grimy production lines. My clothes are filthy. I have bl...
- September 28, 2011
You’re pretty for a Tamil girl.
...
- September 27, 2011
Immigration!
A police officer as he enters a restaurant with mostly non-white employees. Followed by laughter from our (white) manager....
- September 27, 2011
Oh my god! Wow. Just. Wow! That’s really unbelivable, I never would have guessed!
A cisgendered gay man after finding out that I - also a gay man - am trans. Makes me feel frustrated, scrutini...
- September 27, 2011
It won’t work if you don’t smile!
Male customer to me, a 25-year-old female - and I can assure you the equipment I was using will work equally well regardless of the operator’s moo...
- September 27, 2011
You’re smart for a Mexican.
Said to me by another Latino after helping him with a math problem in an honors class. I am extremely shy so most people who meet me assume I’m a immigrant ...
- September 27, 2011
I won’t ever use the word ‘cisgender’ - it’s a useless word.
A person who claims to be a trans ally said this to me....
- September 26, 2011
Relax ladies, it’s no big deal!
A Boston cop, to my friends and I (women, early twenties) after separating a woman and her abuser outside of a bar. We try to see if she’s all right and o...
- September 26, 2011
An older man is paying with credit at my register. When I (28 year old woman) quickly take his card to swipe it, he laughs and says, “Well, look at you grabbing at my credit card! Isn’t ...
- September 26, 2011
Seriously, you’re not going to pay for her?
Waiter to my male friend after we asked for separate checks. As a queer woman, this offended me on various levels....
- September 26, 2011
Advertisement for bake sale tomorrow by UC Berkeley College Republicans. Photo via Colorlines....
- September 26, 2011
Hot tranny mess.
Gay man in front of me (trans)....
- September 26, 2011
If someone called me feminine, it’d be like calling me a faggot. And if I called some chick masculine, well… that’s just unfortunate for her ugly ass.
Cisgender hetero coworker to ...
- September 26, 2011
I’ve had so many people get excited when I start speaking and they see that I don’t have an accent. And I’ve had so many people ask where I’m ‘really’ from. I am Asian American....
- September 26, 2011
Happy Meal toy promotions have recently been separated into “girl” and “boy.” The ones I want are labeled “boy toys.” Guess only boys like video games and Pokémon....
- September 25, 2011
Look at the women, fooling around in the kitchen.
Made me feel like my interest in cooking is a given, and all the work I’ve put into getting better was irrelevant. And also like my arrangemen...
- September 25, 2011
I found some sort of comedy club called Tourettes Without Regrets. As far as I can tell, it has nothing to do with actual Tourette’s. I feel as if the condition I suffer from daily as been compl...
- September 25, 2011
Sorry if you can’t get married now!
White male classmate on bus who accidentally bumps into me (an Indian American girl) while I’m sitting in one of the seats. In high school & mad...
- September 24, 2011
The whites have become black.
David Starkey, historian, blaming English riots on black culture. I was stunned....
- September 24, 2011
When I search on Google for “LGBTQ” and it corrects my search as “LGBT”....
- September 24, 2011
Haha! You look like my girl did last night when I was done with her!
Said to me, a twenty-something girl, by a forty-something man at the gym as I hobbled off of the treadmill. Made me feel uncomfor...
- September 24, 2011
While attending an American graduate program in China I was told numerous times by male American students that they prefer to date the local women because American women are too big/aggressive/slutty....
- September 24, 2011
I had a chude moment-I didn’t know if it was a chick or a dude.
Administrator on a college campus. Made me feel horrified, sad, concerned for students....
- September 23, 2011
I have to get used to game design and programming seminars discussed using “he”, “him” and other male pronouns in English. I’m a woman who both creates and enjoys games. ...
- September 23, 2011
I was fully qualified for the job, but they gave it to a black girl.
White neighbor, in conversation. I felt this person was implying that the black girl wasn’t qualified, or that she only go...
- September 23, 2011
My advice to you, stop wasting your time and look for a job that will pay the bills.
Headmaster of the private school I attended on scholarship, while discussing university applications and my finan...
- September 23, 2011
Of course I’m attracted to Pamela Anderson! What normal man wouldn’t be?
My dad, when we were watching TV. Made me feel angry and sad that as an asexual girl, he probably won’t thi...
- September 23, 2011
You much more refined than other Black girls.
My coworker to me. 21 years old, in Florida. Made me angry, speechless....
- September 22, 2011
Rest In Power | We are suspending Microaggressions today in memory of Troy Davis, who was killed last night by the state of Georgia despite substantial doubt about his conviction. Our blog is so limit...
- September 22, 2011
On my way into the mall, I passed by a couple of security guards talking amongst each other. One of them said, “Well, she had such a nice ass. How could I not whistle at her?” 15 years old...
- September 22, 2011
Wow, you are getting pretty good at that thing.
Random stranger referring to me pushing my wheelchair that I have used my entire life. Made me feel belittled. We don’t “congratulate peop...
- September 21, 2011
Whenever I am carrying large or bulky objects, I am always asked if I want help. My brother never is, despite the fact that he is a year younger and smaller than I am. Makes me feel belittled and put ...
- September 21, 2011
You just need to get laid.
Said to me, an asexual woman, when I voiced frustration. Made me feel devalued and ridiculous....
- September 21, 2011
Wearing a t-shirt like this....
- September 21, 2011
While at work in a kitchen all the other employees started making Chewbacca noises. I mentioned that I could never make the noise properly.
One of my fellow employees said, “You have to use the ...
- September 20, 2011
I have Asperger’s Syndrome and my mother constantly tells me whenever we go somewhere that plans might change suddenly or something unexpected might happen and I need to be prepared for it so th...
- September 20, 2011
Like a donut, the face needs to be tastefully powdered so that it catches the eye of hungry construction workers. Don a deliciously dapper mug with today’s Groupon to Oasis Day Spa.
The first sent...
- September 20, 2011
Comedian Dat Phan in a commercial for DirecTV. ...
- September 20, 2011
You can’t play with them - they don’t speak English.
A mother to her approximately 4 year-old son at the playground when he attempted to play with some other children who were speaking S...
- September 20, 2011
After taking my male partner out for a nice dinner, I (female) ask the waiter for the check. The waiter brings the check to the table and hands it to my partner. I hand back the check with my credit...
- September 20, 2011
When my husband and I were looking for our first apartment together, upon hearing my Indian name, the landlord asked our realtor if my cooking is going to stink up his hallways. Brooklyn, NY. I shrugg...
- September 20, 2011
Why do you talk so white?
To me, a black woman....
- September 19, 2011
I’m a university instructor. The Strauss-Kahn affair came up in class, and its aftermath in French politics: lots of women in France are coming forward to denounce a sexist culture. I find mysel...
- September 19, 2011
Surveying gender is easy because there’s only male and female.
A college professor in a research-based course. I was too uncomfortable to speak up....
- September 19, 2011
A couple of years ago, I worked briefly in retail. I would often come to work without make-up on, although I was told (informally) that it was part of the “uniform” of our all-female team ...
- September 19, 2011
In the recent August issue of Shape magazine, there was an article called “America The Beautiful”, in which the writers “searched high and low for the most coveted looks across the c...
- September 19, 2011
It’s okay. I won’t think of you as Jewish.
A Christian classmate, after telling her my religion. I was angry that my faith would change her opinion of me, frustrated that she would ̶...
- September 18, 2011
Sorry, you can’t do this trip with your high school friends… Sorry, you can’t qualify for scholarships… Sorry, you can’t work here… Sorry, you can’t open a ba...
- September 18, 2011
Would it bother you if I called you nigger?
Question asked by a “friend” in high school to me, a bi-racial (half black/half white) teen....
- September 18, 2011
Why do you try to look so unfriendly instead of like a nice girl? You’ll never get a job when you look like white trash.
I get this constantly from my mother about my butch presentation....
- September 18, 2011
THAT’S her? She’s beautiful! When you said she dated Dave I assumed she’d be a beastly creature!
My friend’s mom, upon being introduced to me, a bisexual female. “Dave&...
- September 17, 2011
Believe me, my son is NOT gay. He has never once touched a Barbie, he’s built like a linebacker, and he’s a real man’s man.
Said by my coworker, a white ciswoman, during happy hour...
- September 17, 2011
In 9th grade, our “health” teacher sits us down and has us watch a video in which a speaker tells us about how selfish it is for rape victims to want abortions if they become pregnant....
- September 17, 2011
No, can you get one of the boys to carry that out? It’s too heavy for you.
Because I’m a 5’ 2” girl, I apparently cannot carry a box of groceries out to a customers car despi...
- September 17, 2011
Wait, can I catch your Asperger’s?
Said to me (a queer female who has been diagnosed with Asperger’s) by my partner (an “open-minded” woman who works at a non-profit in which...
- September 17, 2011
My pastor said you guys, like, worship the darkness. Is that true?
I’m a 29 year-old second-generation Indian American woman born in San Diego. A young coworker asks me this, after asking abou...
- September 16, 2011
One of the bullet points in my sister’s 7th grade Sex Ed packet: “Students will be taught the benefits of a monogamous, heterosexual marriage.” Arizona, 2010. Made me feel annoyed, d...
- September 16, 2011
You’re too white-washed to speak Spanish. Stop it.
I was 17, in high school; said to me by my white peers while speaking to a Mexican friend. I’m Mexican-Dominican.
It made me feel like ...
- September 16, 2011
Anyone who can get a girl to enroll in this class gets extra credit.
At an electrical engineering class of all guys. ...
- September 15, 2011
My featured headlines on my Yahoo News feed change when I log into a profile that specifies that I am female. Usually, they change from world events-heavy to stories about celebrity breakups and mirac...
- September 15, 2011
She’s pretty for a Black girl.
One of two people talking about me. I was hugely disappointed because I had plenty of respect for her....
- September 15, 2011
I’ll believe it when you don’t just hook up with girls, but actually bring one home as your girlfriend.
My brother presenting his theory that I’m not actually bisexual. I’m o...
- September 15, 2011
My uncle asks what I’m studying. Feminist Methodology. He says you don’t need to read anymore, that’s just milking men for all their worth.
19, in my home, 2011. Made me feel misun...
- September 14, 2011
You look so pretty washing the dishes! I’m glad you’re learning young. That way, when you get married, you’ll know what to do.
...
- September 14, 2011
Every time a character in a book is introduced in a way that focuses on how fat they are in a way to foreshadow laziness, cowardice, haughtiness, or other undesirable traits the character will exhibit...
- September 14, 2011
I am an overweight half Chinese and half white female. I’m trying to get in shape because I feel better and more energized when I’m active. Looking better in clothes is a nice bonus.
My Ch...
- September 14, 2011
While working in a mail room, my coworkers and I are joking around. Someone makes a comment about how strange it is when people just smile all the time, or are walking around smiling at the sidewalk f...
- September 14, 2011
Hey, if you don’t like it when they use ‘gay’ like that, then don’t pay attention to them. Don’t let yourself get so worked up about it.
...
- September 14, 2011
An older man who I am hoping is a veteran feels the need to tell me, “I killed many of your people, but I have no ill feelings towards the Vietnamese.” I’m Filipino....
- September 14, 2011
You’re asking for trouble with those jeans.
Mother to me. 19 years old, Singapore. Made me angry, ashamed, feel stripped of autonomy....
- September 13, 2011
People still express polite surprise after finding out that I’m still bisexual, even after college. It makes me feel like my sexuality is invalid to them. ...
- September 13, 2011
You aren’t really disabled.
...
- September 13, 2011
After my paternal cousin had her first daughter, her father and stepmother, both white, announced to the family that they were going by “Lolo” and “Lola”, because they knew my ...
- September 13, 2011
I’m mixed race but look white. My first name is Native American and many black/African Americans have my last name. When meeting my friend’s mother, who is white and upper-middle class, sh...
- September 13, 2011
You guys are really good gardeners”.
My friend in my car while we are driving. I am Mexican American....
- September 13, 2011
During my vacation to Mexico, I upload some pictures online for friends to see of my relatives. On one of the pictures, my friend comments: “Wow! Your cousins are dressed normal!” When I g...
- September 13, 2011
On the show Toddlers & Tiaras, a mother was talking about her little girl who is a tomboy. She likes to hunt with her father and loves playing soccer. The mother concludes that the little girl is ...
- September 13, 2011
I am carrying a little cousin when an uncle sees me and says, “Good, that way you’ll practice for when you have kids.” I tell him, “I don’t want any kids.” He just ...
- September 12, 2011
I’m fine with homeless people who have psychological disorders, but what I don’t understand is NORMAL people who have to be homeless. Why don’t they get jobs? Why don’t they ge...
- September 12, 2011
While the girls in my gym class start to play ultimate, all the boys are lined up on one side of the field, ready to split into teams for football. I walk over to join that line and they refuse to mak...
- September 12, 2011
A middle-aged woman walks in the Japanese restaurant I work at and asks me if we have Kikkoman brand soy sauce. I tell her that we don’t have that brand and she looks at me, frustrated, and sa...
- September 12, 2011
We all fall into those roles eventually.
My mothers’ opinion on gender stereotypes....
- September 12, 2011
I’m walking home with my boyfriend after a date. We’d both dressed up for the date; I’m wearing a strapless, body-hugging mini-dress.
A man yells, almost in an angry and malicious to...
- September 12, 2011
Wow, that’s really irresponsible of you.
What he said when I told him to wear a condom because I wasn’t on birth control, in an otherwise frank and equitable discussion about our sexual ...
- September 12, 2011
How does A WOMAN get the idea to study computer science?
Made me feel attacked, forced to defend myself; like the speaker thought I was defective for not fitting his stereotypes....
- September 9, 2011
When I was over at my friend’s house, her mother called my friend out of the room for a chat. When my friend returned, she asked my girlfriend and I to not sit next to each other because it made...
- September 9, 2011
Wow, I’m so autistic.
This boy said this after spilling a drink all over his new suede shoes....
- September 9, 2011
Gender and birth date are two fields that will never change.
Two business-end people in the office across from me. I’m a trans woman, and have been out at the lab for four months now....
- September 9, 2011
I was talking about how biased the SAT is for low income students who can’t afford SAT prep. A friend (who goes to a prestigious university) said, “Well, those kids probably can’t af...
- September 9, 2011
What can you do with curly, frizzy hair? make it go away!
Frizz-Ease commercial on TV fairly often. Thank you for reminding me, an African American woman, once again that my hair is a birth defect t...
- September 9, 2011
Don’t get all manic on me now.
Every time I disagree with my boyfriend’s father’s or step-mother’s political sentiments. Apparently, because I’m have bi-polar disorder,...
- September 8, 2011
Every time anyone asks “Are you a boy or a girl?” I don’t know how to respond because I’m genderqueer and apparently my identity doesn’t exist. Everywhere, all the time. ...
- September 8, 2011
Every time I see a commercial for Carl’s Jr. (aka Hardees), usually featuring models in swimsuits or men doing ‘men’ things. Makes me feel like I’m not welcome in Carl’s ...
- September 8, 2011
You look normal.
When I tell people that I have bipolar disorder. Makes me feel invalidated, irritated, tired....
- September 8, 2011
Well, you must like this weather, right?
Guy says this to me on one of the hottest days of the year. I am of Indian descent, but was born in the Northeast of the US. July, at a meeting. It made me f...
- September 8, 2011
There’s a black doll at the Dollar Store named Alexis; It’s like a ghetto mini me!
White Hispanic girl named Alexis from my high school. I understood that it was innocent ignorance on he...
- September 7, 2011
My college, which is a minority majority college, just hired five new vice presidents. One is a person of color, and all of them are male, even though I know their hiring pool was much more diverse. M...
- September 7, 2011
Why doesn’t she look like a girl? She looks like a boy.
A little girl that my daughter befriended at the library kept asking over and over.
My daughter is 2 years old and was wearing a red shi...
- September 7, 2011
Did you cut your hair? We don’t like short hair on our girls in this family.
My dad, after I walked in the room with my hair up. One of the many comments on how he thinks the girls in my famil...
- September 7, 2011
I’m filling out a personality test form and it asks whether I find men or women attractive.
I’m a 21 year old, genderqueer “bi”sexual. Made me feel annoyed about the gender...
- September 7, 2011
You know, if I were hiring for a job like that, I don’t know that I would hire, you know, a young lady.
My boyfriend’s dad, talking about my job unloading boxes at a large retailer. July...
- September 7, 2011
#reasonstobeatyourgirlfriend is trending on Twitter
31st July 2011, makes me feel depressed...
- September 7, 2011
I’m coordinating a project, and a director wants to give my name to her staff to send me submissions. With her pen poised, she asks “So who do they send things to?” I say my name, an...
- September 7, 2011
I didn’t know girls played video games.
My professor wrote this on my evaluation sheet for a project I did on game theory and video game players....
- September 6, 2011
Do you speak Norwegian?
Asked to me by a man in a neighbourhood café. I have lived in Norway my entire life. I am multiracial. It made me feel insulted, sad, like I am not allowed to belong anywher...
- September 6, 2011
Asian toddlers are the cutest things in the woorld. Adopting a few on eBay. No… but seriously.
My facebook newsfeed today....
- September 6, 2011
Oh, I watch that show Outsourced! JAI HO!!
College frat boy to me, a Pakistani-American 19-year-old. I didn’t want to clarify that there’s a difference between Pakistani and Indian. Or t...
- September 6, 2011
No, I can tell you aren’t. You have lighter skin so it’s impossible.
My fifth grade teacher, after mentioning that I was Arabic. Made me feel generalized and overlooked....
- September 6, 2011
On my way to the bus stop, I witnessed an argument escalating between a young man and a young woman. She was becoming violent, and he threatened her verbally. It seemed unsafe for me to ask what was g...
- September 6, 2011
People of mixed-race are so beautiful! Puerto Rico has the most beautiful women!
Every time I mention my country or my race. Thank you for saying that my race and/or my nationality makes me beautifu...
- September 6, 2011
Being bi is just a transition step between straight and gay. People who are bi just need to choose!
Two of my friends (both 19-yr-old college students) reacting to bisexuality....
- September 5, 2011
I was kidding. I know you’re Puerto Rican, not Mexican. And I think that’s pretty sexy.
Girl from Arizona to me on a New York rooftop....
- September 5, 2011
While attending a charity boxing match between Marines and Firefighters/PD, there was ONE match where women were boxing. There was a firefighter boxing a policewoman. During the match, the announcer k...
- September 5, 2011
But you’re so cute! Why do you want to be a boy?
A woman at my church - one that supposedly is welcoming to gender and sexual minorities. Completely worthless, completely erased. Trans men don...
- September 5, 2011
I’m male, and am asking this question to non-binary identified people. Why do you give so much of a crap? Why can’t you just lighten up, let the thread happen, and ignore it?
...
- September 5, 2011
A multiple choice question asked me who brought agriculture, architecture, and Christianity to the Southwest. All the options were Spanish explorers and missionaries. This completely negates the subst...
- September 5, 2011
I opened my mouth for a strep test. I didn’t gag. The doctor said, “Oh! Your husband must LOVE you!” Then I gagged. “Oh, maybe not,” he said. I’m 23, 2011, Minnesot...
- September 5, 2011
A woman on the bus is convinced that two of her Hispanic coworkers must being sleeping with the boss, because there is no reason they should make as much money as she, a white women, does....
- September 4, 2011
What ARE you?
Another mom, someone I had never met before, at a backyard birthday party which my kindergarten-age daughter attended. Eventually she made it clear she meant ethnicity: “Are you ...
- September 4, 2011
I went to the doctor for unexplained severe headaches. The doctor asked about my sex life, asking if my boyfriend and I are using protection, etc. When I told him I had a very active sex life with my ...
- September 4, 2011
On joining pickup soccer games (an almost exclusively male space), as a young looking 24 year old girl I either get overly-complimented or overly-patronized.
“You must be tired… how are yo...
- September 4, 2011
I still love you and accept that you were born this way, but you got it from your dad. His side of the family has the queer genes.
My mother, when I came out to her as a trans man....
- September 4, 2011
…but there was a lesbian couple in line who were saying a really passionate goodbye for like, half an hour, so I didn’t mind the wait.
My brother, straight, 20’s, about the upside ...
- September 4, 2011
Every single time I am standing in a line, people use the space in front of me, no matter how small, to cut through. I am a female and short in stature. If it only happened sometimes, I’d shrug ...
- September 4, 2011
Indians (meaning First Nations) are paid $400 a month to sit on the couch and do nothing.
An 11 year old girl to me. When I tell her that’s not true, she says, “Well, that’s what I...
- September 3, 2011
It’s that moment when I’m out with my son, whether with my fiance (his father) or not, and a person will walk past us, smile at my son, then immediately look at my bare finger, then up to ...
- September 3, 2011
Well, what were you wearing?
My mom, in response to my rant about my day where a bicyclist made kissing noises to me while riding by, the UPS man called me “sexy” three times in one sent...
- September 3, 2011
When sitting with some friends, they told some racist jokes. I said it was in bad taste, and they respond saying “It’s not like there are any ‘real’ ethnics around” when ...
- September 3, 2011
We’re very sorry if we offended you. This was very uncomfortable for us. The problem was not you, G-d forbid, but that your relationship would become a topic at the Shabbos table that might caus...
- September 3, 2011
In a teacher professional development session, the facilitator says, “Think about the process you went through to learn how to drive.” After talking for a few minutes, she finally asks, &#...
- September 3, 2011
Abroad with several Americans, most of them white. One girl starts lecturing me on “American culture” in the same way she’s explained it to residents of the country we’re vis...
- September 3, 2011
I’m at a stall at Pride for a charity that places LGB teenagers with foster carers and mentors. Although it clearly says LGB for the teenagers, the literature only specifies lesbian and gay care...
- September 3, 2011
Alright love, how you doing tonight? You look lonely, want some company?
Shouted at me often. As a woman I shouldn’t have to feel afraid to be outside alone after dark, but the sad fact is I d...
- September 2, 2011
You know how rap has always been “my phone and my car and I’m awesome and saying my name over and over again and my jewelry and my money?” And it wasn’t until Eminem came along...
- September 2, 2011
The official towels of Wimbledon (the tennis tournament): men’s are always the official, “neutral” tournament colors (dark green, gold and purple), while women’s a “gende...
- September 2, 2011
I’m going to school to be an astrophysicist. No one has made a big deal about the fact that I’m a woman, but whenever I tell an adult woman what I’m doing, she inevitably says, ...
- September 2, 2011
I’m sitting on the porch with one of my fraternity brothers and two white girls. Both of us are mixed race (he’s black and white, I’m Haitian, Puerto Rican, white, and Native America...
- September 2, 2011
You should apply for the assistant manager job. You’re the most knowledgeable here, and besides, for a female you’ve got a backbone.
Older male boss to me, a 21-year-old woman, while at ...
- September 2, 2011
To the privileged old white man I served food to today:I didn’t say anything when you fetishized Asian culture. I stood silently as you talked at me about the East Asian studies class you took y...
- September 2, 2011
“Growing attraction to the opposite sex” is listed as a teenage cause of stress, as if none of us are ever attracted to the same sex. I am sixteen, and this is in my state’s online p...
- September 2, 2011
A couple months ago, the College Republicans made a campaign against said safe spaces. Today, I was discussing safe spaces for LGBTQ and the Black Students Organization on our campus with a couple oth...
- September 1, 2011
Whenever I buy any sort of small electronics (headphones, a USB cable, a clock with an Ipod dock) at Marshall’s or TJMaxx, they’re listed on my receipt as “men’s accessories.&#...
- September 1, 2011
That’s crazy.
At least 10 times a day. I live with a psychiatric disability....
- September 1, 2011
My mother contends that my sister, who is cis, needs to learn how to cook, something she’s never said to me, a trans woman. I’m angry that my mother thinks women are obligated to be domest...
- September 1, 2011
Wow! You’re so articulate!!
White co-workers at a high-profile US government agency where I intern. They never say this to White interns. Before I did an interview for Newsweek, I was briefed ...
- September 1, 2011
I am a female, 21 year old server in a busy, casual restaurant. While I am inputting an order for a table, a man from another table comes up behind the counter, begins rubbing my lower back and asks m...
- September 1, 2011
Your husband just called and said that you can buy whatever you want.
Sign in dressing room. When I go to the store personnel and point out that the sign is sexist, the lady tells me it’s a jo...
- October 30, 2011
A brief hiatus | Dear readers, as you may have noticed, we’ve been mostly reblogging our old entries lately. When we come back, we’ll start posting submissions again but also hope to begin...
- October 30, 2011
microaggressions:
We were discussing some topic in my Anthropology class, and the professor called on me by referring to me as the “aggressive, African queen in the back.” I was so shocked I look...
- October 29, 2011
I know what I just said sounds prejudiced, but I’m really not.
My coworker, putting his hand on my arm after he suggested that only black people would vote for Obama because he’s black, the way ...
- October 29, 2011
Have a good life, to a good but fat kid!
yearbook comment from a high school friend (via microaggressions)...
- October 28, 2011
You have to think about how something like that would look on you’re resume. People might make assumptions.
My Dad, when I was deciding between volunteering at a GLBTQ health center and another mo...
- October 28, 2011
microaggressions:
A white lecturer (who is a practicing psychologist) assumes that an Asian client married to a white man must be a mail order bride. I call her out in the class. She and another whit...
- October 28, 2011
I want to steal a black baby. Black babies are just so much cuter than white babies!
A white administrator at work, after a mother came in for a conference and brought her little daughter (via micro...
- October 27, 2011
Wow, you don’t sound Asian on the phone!
Job interview (via microaggressions)...
- October 27, 2011
microaggressions:
I’m South Asian and go by ‘Sam’. When I introduced myself to a white man at a party, he asked me what Sam was ‘short for’. When I replied ‘Samantha’, he told me that h...
- October 27, 2011
Im Offended That Black People Can Call White People Racial Names But Us White People Cant Call Them Racial Names Back Or Its ‘Discrimination’
Facebook group (via microaggressions)...
- October 26, 2011
microaggressions:
As a genderqueer person, I always dread signing up on new websites, and try to avoid the ones that ask for a gender and only offer two options.
Prior to Pottermore’s early opening...
- October 25, 2011
Hi Miss [woman with a PhD], do you know where Dr. [male colleague without a PhD]’s office is?
I’m a 32-year old woman with a PhD who works at a private liberal arts college. (via microaggressi...
- October 25, 2011
I call you that because that’s what you are. You’re Chinese. You’re Oriental. It’s what you are.
Girl in high school. Made me feel offended, angry, frustrated. (via microaggressions)...
- October 25, 2011
microaggressions:
While at the laundromat, a white man and white woman are having a conversation about immigration. The white man turns to me and asks me where I am from. I say, “from the United St...
- October 25, 2011
Seriously, I would totally date you if you were skinny!
...
- October 25, 2011
She goes from a geisha tease to a ninja with ease!
The description for a Halloween costume called “Geisha Beauty to Ninja Cutie”, depicted being worn by a white woman. Made me feel fetis...
- October 25, 2011
I tried to explain the concept of “white male communication” to a group of three guys who kept talking over me. ...
- October 24, 2011
That’s not what a real man would do.
My mother to me, after I told her that I plan to apply to women’s colleges. I am a pre-T and pre-op trans* guy who is concerned for his safety and wa...
- October 24, 2011
How’d you get a regular name?
An employee at a pizza shop said this when I went to pick up my order. I am an Asian-American 23-year-old living in the Southeast US. I was offended and frustrat...
- October 24, 2011
While discussing the overarching theme of family - specifically parenthood - in a novel, my professor said this of a character who had adopted a child: “X is a father, too. Well, not a real fath...
- October 24, 2011
That’s ghetto!
Said often by mainly white middle-class students at my university in reference to anything viewed as “black,” “poor and black,” or “bad.”...
- October 24, 2011
Dreamcatchers sold in Urban Outfitters....
- October 24, 2011
Dear readers,
As of right now, you can add your own tags in the contribution form! (See the “Relevant identities” field.)
Best, Editors...
- October 24, 2011
via saucy-sarah:
From Ohio University’s Students Teaching About Racism in Society
...
- October 24, 2011
No offense, but that’s seriously gay.
A friend of mine, after telling them about a teacher failing me over a miscommunication. Said friend is one of the few people who knows that I am queer. ...
- October 24, 2011
I express that my brother attends a private university. Immediately a girl in the car responds in a very sure voice “Oh, he plays football?” This is the second time this has happened. As...
- October 23, 2011
I called Apple for assistance with my broken laptop. The man who helped me set up an appointment at a nearby Genius Bar because he wasn’t able to figure out what was going wrong over the phone. ...
- October 23, 2011
My husband’s assistant asked him why he hadn’t brought coffee to work with him one day. When he told her it was because his wife had bought some coconut flavored creamer that he didn’...
- October 23, 2011
A girl in my English class says, “You’re Chinese, right? Have you ever eaten dog?” When I inform her that I’m actually Korean, her response is a dismissive “Whatever.R...
- October 23, 2011
Working in issues of diversity at a large pre-dominantly white university and standing up in front of a group of peers, academics and top administrators in response to a ‘diversity report.’...
- October 23, 2011
Most workplace harassment is a case of women being oversensitive about the advances of men.
My male boss to my male coworker. Made me concerned for my safety....
- October 23, 2011
Teachers for years in elementary school called me Ingrid, my name is Monica. Ingrid was the only other black girl in my grade for three years. I was 8, 1982, Metro Detroit. Made me feel like all bla...
- October 23, 2011
Looking around a boardgame store, I see the classic “Life” and then “Redneck Life.” You get welfare points for having more children. The winner has the most teeth left at the e...
- October 22, 2011
Kaitlyn sure can kick good for a girl.
19 year old boy manager to 18 year old girl soccer played on the bench during a game. Made me feel unimportant, angry, & stupid....
- October 22, 2011
You’ll change your mind.Once you get pregnant your whole viewpoint will change.You’ll come around when you have a kid.You’re young, you don’t know what you want.
…etc.
Th...
- October 22, 2011
Oh you look like your parents own a restaurant.
An older white male in his 60s said this to me as I was at a Seattle liquor store. I am of Chinese descent and my parents don’t own a restaurant...
- October 22, 2011
Why do homosexuals keep whining about marriage? They should be happy with the rights they have right now.
Another airman, to me, a bisexual woman in the military when Don’t Ask Don’t Tel...
- October 22, 2011
You should enter a few more tournaments. A pretty girl like you will do well with the male judges.
My female debate coach, trying to convince me to continue being on the debate team. Made me feel l...
- October 22, 2011
That is such a Hawaiian thing to say.
My career counseling teacher said to me when I mentioned wanting a balance between work and family life. I don’t know what her perception of Hawaiians is ...
- October 22, 2011
Make sure you give it to a pretty girl!
Said to me, a 23 year old trans man, by a woman from whom I was purchasing a flower. I felt conflicted, erased, invisible. It was nice to be read as male, but...
- October 21, 2011
I was chatting with the woman driving my taxi. She was discussing a customer who went to tag sales and bargained hard with a particular vendor, and said: “She could really Jew that guy.” ...
- October 21, 2011
I SAID A NORMAL NAME……AMERICAN!!
Someone asking for help naming a character on Yahoo! Answers. Made me annoyed, despondent....
- October 21, 2011
I asked you out because you are so pretty; if I had known that you were also really intelligent, I wouldn’t have asked you out.
An ex-boyfriend during our relationship. Made me feel that my lo...
- October 21, 2011
I volunteer for a performing arts center, and I am told on my second day of ushering that women are not allowed to wear neckties because “it’s distracting.” I am dressed identically ...
- October 21, 2011
No one really needs to study that!
My aunt, to me after I told her I was taking a couple disability studies courses in University this year. I felt like my experience as a disabled person has no va...
- October 21, 2011
Asians drivers - no survivors!
Student joking on Stanford campus, after seeing an Asian American student cut a corner instead of going all the way around a roundabout on a bike....
- October 21, 2011
Why can’t we interview you? We’re trying to do something for YOUR people.
A reporter from my university’s newspaper said this to me, an employee at our school’s GLBTQ Resour...
- October 20, 2011
My friend sent me a picture text of a very overweight woman. In response, I asked her why she sent me the image. “Its funny,” she said. “She waddles when she walks!” This is not the frist time...
- October 20, 2011
You’re so beautiful - why are you still single?
This is a question I hear on a weekly basis from acquaintances, family, and complete strangers. I’m a graduate student with an A- average,...
- October 20, 2011
No offense, but women ruined the navy and the military in general. Things were a lot better when it was just men on ships because that way, they could be real men.
Said to me by my supervisor. IR...
- October 20, 2011
Life only gets harder. Get over it.
My college guidance counselor who I was sent to after the disability center said they couldn’t help me. I have Severe Reoccurring Major Depression, Generali...
- October 20, 2011
You need to get out of your comfort zone.
An acquaintance when I told her that I didn’t want to perform my character in a play as a female. I am a trans guy, pre-everything, living in a women...
- October 20, 2011
Twinkle twinkle, little whore, you’re at school, not Jersey Shore. You’re a slutty, orange mess; please go find a longer dress.
Being reblogged on Tumblr....
- October 20, 2011
I feel so bad for them [women working in a fabric store] because they don’t have anyone to carry the heavy things.
A woman to her daughter, as I (a 30-year-old female employee) carry a large b...
- October 19, 2011
I’m an African American graduate student, and I teach at a large university. Today, one of my students submits an assignment with a racist “bonus” cartoon at the bottom featuring a K...
- October 19, 2011
My boyfriend and I were at the local planetarium/observatory, asking a docent questions about star formation. The older, white, male docent directed all of his answers straight to my boyfriend, withou...
- October 19, 2011
My writing teacher training class includes an online forum component, where we can hash out issues we don’t get to during class time. One student wrote the following as if it were no big deal: ...
- October 19, 2011
In history class, I made a comment about how someone was a god. Immediately, someone pointed out that having more than one god is a sin.
Made me feel like my beliefs didn’t matter because I di...
- October 19, 2011
Sluttiness is just a sign of desperation, but its not like I don’t like it.
My friend’s Twitter....
- October 19, 2011
My teacher gives a homework assignment to go to a place that is culturally foreign to us as a way to explore cross-cultural issues. My classmate makes a joke that I should go to a high-powered busin...
- October 19, 2011
Any room for me between there?
Shouted at my new girlfriend and I while we were sharing a kiss. Made me feel frustrated and objectified, like my affections and sexuality were seen as pretty display...
- October 19, 2011
That’s, um, well, I’ve always been just baffled and irritated by that. Well, no, I don’t want a penis. Why would I want a penis?
An older lesbian woman at a panel discussion after ...
- October 18, 2011
Big Boys Rape Our Young Girls But Violet Gives Willingly
How most of my classmates remember the resistor colour code. At an avionics course in Canada....
- October 18, 2011
You’re pretty for an Asian.
A straight white man said this to me, a Chinese American woman, when I was 18. He said it as a sincere compliment....
- October 18, 2011
I found these nails at Walgreens. I’m an eighteen-year-old female. Makes me feel sad that “being a girl” is something to market via plastic ze...
- October 18, 2011
Practicing already, huh?
My step-dad said this to me when I was 8-9 while I was eating a popsicle. At the time I had no idea what he meant, but now it makes me feel dirty....
- October 18, 2011
Cal students Kritz Eliza and Taylor Matzen, dressed as American Indians, participate during a College Republicans bake sale....
- October 18, 2011
I appreciate that the national bookstore I work for has a decent sized ‘Feminism’ section. I do not appreciate that it’s categorized under ‘Alternative Lifestyle’....
- October 17, 2011
Your English is excellent.
An Ivy League professor to me, an 18 year old male of Lebanese descent. I am an American citizen who went to high school in Switzerland. Made me feel offended, completely ...
- October 17, 2011
To me, [nigga] is like a bro term. A term of endearment.
Made me feel marginalized and invalid in my distaste for that word. Like I shouldn’t dislike the term because white boys use it as a te...
- October 17, 2011
You’re not gonna believe this. Today I just found out they make plus-sized jewelry! How fucked up is that? I mean, if you’re so fat that you can’t even fit a regular necklace around ...
- October 17, 2011
We should take points off for the grade with the most promiscuously dressed girls at homecoming.
A boy at my high school Student Council meeting while discussing a Spirit Week to get people riled up...
- October 16, 2011
My father insinuated at home that women (feminists) only become angry when he says sexist things because PMS makes them emotional and irrational. And when I tried to argue with him about it, he said, ...
- October 16, 2011
You have so many black friends.
Last time I checked, all of your friends are white. But I guess that’s okay right? Because white is the norm. Bullshit....
- October 16, 2011
Oh god, no! I would never DATE a woman!
Girl at a party, who told me she was bisexual. I’d asked her if the girl she’d been talking to was her partner....
- October 16, 2011
Oh, you’ll get in - you’re a girl and you’re a minority.
I was 24 years old, 2010, in the USA, when I (a 4th year med student) told an older resident I wanted to be a surgeon. Make...
- October 16, 2011
I love Broadway Musicals, Lady Gaga, and Karen Walker. I’m a gay man trapped in a woman’s body. Happy National Coming Out Day.
Tweeted by a self proclaimed liberal individual....
- October 15, 2011
I hope they’re whistling at you.
My boss, on the only day I’ve worn a skirt and makeup to work, after hearing a loud whistle on the street. I’m 21 and rarely feel comfortable in &#...
- October 15, 2011
Stop acting like a princess! You’re acting like a princess!! Ooh… little princess… boo hoo.
Parents talking to their crying, four-year-old son....
- October 15, 2011
Dr. Pepper commercial ...
- October 15, 2011
The Racialicious/Racebending panel at San Diego Comic-Con, discussing casting and diversity in fandom. (via newdemographic) ...
- October 15, 2011
Me suki suki you long time!
A pair of men in their twenties in my class, talking about Thai massage parlors....
- October 14, 2011
My professor asks me if something she is thinking about saying about another student is racist.
I am black (& apparently a spokesperson for black people), but I have nothing to do with this other ...
- October 14, 2011
Of course I love you, I just prefer the straight part of you to the gay part.
My ex-girlfriend after telling her I’m bisexual....
- October 14, 2011
My 55 year old mom with limited English skills is walking in our neighborhood at 10:30 PM to pick me up at the subway station. I don’t like walking home alone especially after a good time hangin...
- October 14, 2011
A bar with a friend, I order an espresso stout. She remarks how I like MANLY beers, but she only likes girly beers.
I have the same taste in drinks as my mom and many of my female friends. My dad drin...
- October 13, 2011
People confront you, and it’s not once in a while, it’s all the time,” she said. “Each time is like a little paper cut, and you might think, ‘Well, that’s not a big deal.’ But imagine a ...
- October 13, 2011
Some relatives and I are staying at my mother’s house during a family gathering. My uncle sees me shaking out a rug and says to my cousins, “That’s something all women are born kn...
- October 13, 2011
My grandmother referred to me as her, “little white girl” in a card she gave to me at my trunk party - I am the first of her grandchildren to make it to college.
I kind of want to cry bec...
- October 13, 2011
I’m an African-American male-bodied genderqueer who happens to support Ron Paul for President as I was attending the Republican straw polls in Ames, Iowa today. The glares I got from the people ...
- October 13, 2011
In my computer class, work must be done using Word ‘07. I only have Word ‘03 at home, so I come early and stay late trying to get everything done. The teacher knows this and has had severa...
- October 13, 2011
Mr. [surname]
Academic email addressed to me, a woman with an uncommon first name. From a social science department regarding a job inquiry - I am in the top graduate program for my discipline in th...
- October 13, 2011
I work at a prominent New England university and the man who works as the receptionist across the hall is coming in at the same time. He smiles at me, cranes his neck to look at my chest or my butt, a...
- October 13, 2011
Do you know what I love about you? You’re SO stereotypical.
Said to me, a gay college student, by a friend’s boyfriend, at a house party. Made me feel pissed that I can’t enjoy th...
- October 12, 2011
Well, I have trouble concentrating too sometimes. Everybody does. Some people can manage it, though, and some can’t.
My insurance agent while discussing my ADHD. Made me feel angry, invalidat...
- October 12, 2011
No, don’t say that infront of _____! She’s half-black!!
Friends, after an acquaintance casually mutters aloud a racial slur (“oil-somethings”… I hadn’t heard it ...
- October 12, 2011
Ladies and GentlemenBoys and GirlsMeine Damen und HerrenMen and WomenCheck one: ❏ Male ❏ Female
Almost every day. I’m apparently not worth addressing....
- October 12, 2011
Oh, I’m just taking Sarah and her friend to the mall.
My father to one of his buddies as he drives myself and my girlfriend of two and a half years. He knows we’ve been dating that lon...
- October 12, 2011
Where are you from?
This is a question I routinely get from people I meet. When I say I’m from Melbourne (the city where I’ve lived most of my life), I get scoffed at and badgered: ‘No...
- October 11, 2011
Are you sure you aren’t just on your period?
The ER doctor to me when I was 13 and came in in the middle of the night with food poisoning. Made me feel not listened to, like serious medical pr...
- October 11, 2011
“why are halfies ALWAYS attractive? guh.why wasn’t i a halfie? why didn’t my mom marry a white dude? or something of non asian race. and i could have been beautiful.pewwinstead i’m just a ...
- October 11, 2011
I’m sitting on the BART (San Francisco transit), and the young woman behind me is talking about a male acquaintance. Apparently he needs to “grow a pair” and “stop acting lik...
- October 11, 2011
My partner and I adopt a female puppy from a shelter. She has a gender neutral name. Upon learning the puppy’s name and sex, the most common reaction from friends and family is “that’...
- October 11, 2011
You should look for an internship. Most of them are unpaid, but it’s a really great way to get into the field.
Wealthier friend, when I mentioned how hard it was to find an entry-level job in...
- October 11, 2011
That’s gay.
...
- October 11, 2011
Do you speak English?
Said to me by a freshman girl in the restroom while I was waiting for my friend. I am a 15 year old Chinese-American girl. Does standing quietly alone waiting for a friend mean...
- October 10, 2011
Of course he said ‘no’ to you. Men are shallow and weak-minded - you’re not going to get a boyfriend unless you wear high heels instead of your converse and low-cut tops instead of y...
- October 10, 2011
After showing a video about our literacy program with kids of color who tell how much they love to read, white high school volunteers share reactions- many are surprised.
I coordinate volunteers, am m...
- October 10, 2011
You’re a guy? In which version of reality is that?What am I supposed to call you (aside from ‘ladies’)? You’re both women.You’ll always be a woman to me because that&...
- October 10, 2011
LGBT people are six times more likely to attempt suicide than normal people.
A lecture on suicide prevention at UCLA....
- October 10, 2011
From the editors: We just took a look at our visitor stats & saw that 18+% of you, our site visitors, have visited the site 201+ times. Thank you so much for reading, contributing, and supporting ...
- October 10, 2011
I am an activist at Occupy Boston. I make a proposal at a General Assembly and I get no response. Right after me, a man gets up and makes the same one. His gets passed. This is a pattern here. Makes m...
- October 9, 2011
Today during orientation at my new job, we were sharing experiences about difficult customers that we’ve encountered in customer service. One girl, telling a story about someone asking for somet...
- October 9, 2011
You’re mine. I’m yours. That’s how it works.
My boyfriend of half a year, upon finally confronting him about his constant groping and pinching when I have begged him repeatedly to ...
- October 8, 2011
You’ll make a great wife someday!
My grandmother to me, a 16 year-old girl, after I made dinner for my whole family. I cook because I’m the only vegan in my family and it’s the onl...
- October 8, 2011
While standing on my family’s driveway and saying goodbye to guests who are Asian, a group of young men speed past in their car and shout “Welcome to America!” in the most mocking wa...
- October 8, 2011
You two are getting married? That’s great. I hate getting those calls from girls crying that they can’t pay rent because their boyfriend moved out on them. You know… (knowing glance ...
- October 8, 2011
Oh, you’re dressing like a lady today. You should keep that up. You make a much better girl.
Nurse where I work to me, a 22 year-old who identifies as male. Makes me embarrassed about my body,...
- October 8, 2011
Are you sure you’re not pregnant?
Response from three different people, including one grocery store checkout clerk, upon hearing that I am sick. Made me feel like I’m not allowed to thro...
- October 8, 2011
You need to smile more and project more warmth in your voice. Also, you need to suggestive sell more often. I know you can smile more and be nicer. I’ve seen you do it. I don’t ask other p...
- October 7, 2011
So, have you had a bi phase?
My sister, to me, after watching Scott Pilgrim Vs. The World. I am seventeen and bisexual. I come out to her because I can’t think of anything to say. She immediat...
- October 7, 2011
The TV show Big Brother featured a competition that involved a female doll that had hairy legs. One of the contestants called the doll “he-she”....
- October 7, 2011
Some kids want to play violent games, or lame girly games that AREN’T VIOLENT ENOUGH.
Description from the “Raising Kids (Girls, Even) as Gamers” a panel at Penny Arcade Expo 2011,...
- October 7, 2011
At the large-chain retail store where I work, I’m straightening up the toddler department when I hear a little girl crying. I turn around and see her in the toddler boys section, reaching for a ...
- October 7, 2011
I didn’t list my gender on Facebook and appear in my siblings’ family box as Brother....
- October 7, 2011
Wow! You’re a good drummer… for a girl!
Something my amazingly talented drummer friend hears constantly and has for the past 7 years she has been playing gigs. Makes me think that in the...
- October 6, 2011
Quiet down! You’re acting like a bunch of wild Indians!
Substitute teacher....
- October 6, 2011
[Image description: White woman at Slutwalk NYC rally holds up sign reading, “Woman is the nigger of the world”]
Crunk Feminist Collective: I Saw th...
- October 6, 2011
We all have things other people shouldn’t know about.
My mother, when I told her I was transgender....
- October 6, 2011
Take it as a compliment! It just means you’re young and attractive, you’ll be wishing for that attention in 20 years.
A common reaction to stories about middle aged men hitting on me whi...
- October 6, 2011
In a lift in a Hong Kong hotel. A Caucasian woman thanked me for holding the door open for her. In badly pronounced Chinese. I kept quiet. Then she got off at her level and wished me good evening, al...
- October 6, 2011
Blonde or brunette?
Question posed to every hot male actor/singer/celebrity of the moment, in most teen magazines that I grew up with. I could never quite figure out what would be gained by asking s...
- October 6, 2011
I (female) have a pain disorder that can make sexual intercourse painful or impossible. My college boyfriend’s roommate incidentally learns about this in a conversation with my then-boyfriend an...
- October 6, 2011
Well, you can’t reasonably expect health care providers to know anything about your situation. I mean, you’re transsexual, and that’s pretty weird. I don’t know why you’r...
- October 6, 2011
At a DSW in Miami with my mom and grandmother an older white lady cut in front of my mom in a very small aisle. When my mom said “excuse me,” the older white lady told my mother to “...
- October 5, 2011
I had to apply for a parking pass as a dual city resident, and the older male clerk told me I didn’t qualify. When pressed the issue and explained that I had spoken to someone about the pass and...
- October 5, 2011
My history teacher gave the class a bonus question asking who the owner of the Atlanta Falcons NFL team was (The school is located near Atlanta). After a few people in the class complained that it was...
- October 5, 2011
I’d like two tickets to the next show and a smile, Caitlin.
Moviegoer at the theater where I had to wear a name tag. I was in a bad mood and told him I wasn’t paid enough to smile for hi...
- October 5, 2011
I informed some of my friends that I get extended time on a high school final because of a mild learning disability that I have struggled with for my entire life. They proceeded to tell me that I am...
- October 5, 2011
Living with your parents always presents a raft of problems, which is not made easier when you’re transgendered. For example, their refusal to use your (now legal) name or (now legal) sex when...
- October 5, 2011
In high school we need to take a practical art to graduate. I decided to take woodworking to fulfill my requirement. When I went to the counselor’s office to get my schedule approved he kept try...
- October 5, 2011
Watching the pilot of “The Next Food Network Star,” a young chef who happens to have a Mexican heritage cooks French food. The judges advise her that she should cook Mexican food instead. ...
- October 4, 2011
I bring up how masculinity/femininity are culturally specific and white masc/femme notions are talked about as universal. I use an example about how in western contexts, Asian men are considered more ...
- October 4, 2011
Any and every time someone mentions that you can’t have children unless you’re fertile, cisgendered, and in a heterosexual relationship.
I’m adopted....
- October 4, 2011
Oh, but you’re Latin, so you must love the heat!
While discussing the summer weather. I’m from Bogotá - the average temperature is 60°F. I feel like nobody in the States bothers to ...
- October 3, 2011
I worked as a data entry clerk which required me to type. I type one-handed because I’m hemiplegic.
A coworker broke her arm and was on sick leave for several weeks. When she returned, she was o...
- October 3, 2011
A man at a party recently asked me if I carry my cane for fashion purposes, then grilled me about my medical condition after I said no. I’m a 27 year old woman with a neurological condition th...
- October 3, 2011
“All my Asian friends are here! Wait, where’s L? She should be here too.”Said by my friend, who is white and ignores the fact that L and I have no common interests. But yes, we are b...
- October 2, 2011
Go home.
I may not be white, but my home is still only a few blocks away. Not across an ocean/border, thanks....
- October 2, 2011
Yeah, well, medical school and being a doctor can be really hard for women. It’s hard to manage that and have a family.
A neighbor upon hearing my plans for after graduation. He assumed that...
- October 2, 2011
Me love you long time.
A white man who felt compelled to say this while walking past me and my sister today in Marina Del Rey. That’s racist! I couldn’t believe what he had said at fir...
- October 2, 2011
quixotess:
Image description: Three panels from American Born Chinese by Gene Luen Yang. A young adolescent boy stands in front of a classroom full of white st...
- October 1, 2011
You can’t be smurfette, you’re black.
A white friend said this to me when we were discussing Halloween costumes. I’m a black female. She implied that you had to be white in order t...
- October 1, 2011
My grandfather does not speak very good English, and lived in China for most of his life. I however, am half Polish. He was keeping me company in the store where I work, when a Caucasian lady came in....
- October 1, 2011
She’s too sensitive. Why should she get upset at me for calling her what she is?
A friend about referring to me as a tranny. Made me feel awful. Like calling me slurs is okay because I’m...
- October 1, 2011
Is there any way to make it so that ebonics shows up under the Google Translate button? I’m curious to know how black people interact with the site.
(via clientsfromhell)...
- October 1, 2011
I like that you’re bi because it means you’d be open to a threesome.
My ex boyfriend when we started dating....
- November 29, 2011
I am playing a racing game. The game says “Gentlemen, start your engines.” I am a woman. It made me feel marginalized and annoyed....
- November 28, 2011
I ran into a woman in the school cafeteria with a big poster board. She asked random people to write about a “strong black woman” they know. She proudly remarked that someone wrote, R...
- November 27, 2011
Link: U-Bahn Priority Seat Symbols
Vienna U-Bahn balances the gendering of their priority seat symbols....
- November 26, 2011
Oh my god! Will you be my new gay best friend? We can go shopping for clothes!
A straight, female coworker to me upon learning that I, a male, had a boyfriend. I said, “No” and walked...
- November 25, 2011
Are you guys ready to take instructions from a woman?
A female flight attendant to passengers seated in the exit row of an airplane. It made me feel angry and sad that this woman was re-inscribing m...
- November 24, 2011
I wish I could play a schizophrenic. I think it would be fun.
A classmate during our counseling class. We had to take turns role playing the therapist and the client. It made me feel like my m...
- November 23, 2011
During class, a professor asked me at what age I began my schooling in the U.S. I am a Hispanic male, born, raised, and fully educated in the U.S. I cleared my throat and stated that I completed a...
- November 22, 2011
Don’t worry. She’ll change her style soon.
My mom to my brother about my boyish hair, after a photographer read me as male in front of them. It made me feel like my identity is just a...
- November 21, 2011
Leave your master’s degree off your resume. I think your education and your ethnicity are making white people nervous. That’s why you are not getting a job.
Said by a white person to an...
- November 20, 2011
But you’re so smart!
Said to me by several people on different occasions when I tell them I have ADD. Some even tell me that I obviously don’t “really” have ADD because I g...
- November 19, 2011
You should have been born Asian!
A white classmate after hearing that I’m taking difficult academic courses. I’m mixed-race (indigenous South American and white). Made me feel stunne...
- November 17, 2011
Made me feel upset about the rejection of nontraditional male identities. Made me feel disgusted and angered that women are treated as props....
- November 17, 2011
Jay Smooth of Ill Doctrine talks about talking about race at TedxHampshireCollege! ...
- November 16, 2011
Two strong men needed to lift some furniture.
Job advertisement on my university newsletter. Apparently, women can’t be strong. Made me feel inadequate as a woman....
- November 15, 2011
Apparently, her husband’s making it big!
A man to his male friend about a woman that drove by alone in an expensive car....
- November 13, 2011
Today, my grandmother told me about her landlord’s autistic child who is learning to utilize an iPad. She told me that he was learning to speak using the iPad and described it as him “beco...
- November 12, 2011
microaggressions:
My mom says she is okay with my sexuality but doesn’t want me to tell anyone else in case I change my mind. Age: 16
...
- November 12, 2011
Well, she’s Puerto Rican, but she doesn’t come off as Latina. She comes off more, like, business, you know?
Twenty-something white man on his cell phone. (via microaggressions)...
- November 12, 2011
A leader in my synagogue who identifies as liberal tells me the word “homosexual” is only offensive because I want it to be.
...
- November 7, 2011
My world history textbook refers to Islam, Christianity, Judaism, Hinduism, animism, and Buddhism as “religions”. In the chapter on postclassical Mesoamerica, it refers to Aztec religion...
- November 6, 2011
You know, taking up running or something would really be so much cheaper.
My dad when I tell him my antidepressant is going to be $85 per month on my new insurance. He constantly says I could just...
- November 5, 2011
… and her hair evokes a geisha.
Product description for a Chinese Barbie doll....
- November 4, 2011
We can split a dessert. That way you won’t feel guilty.
My dad said this to me at a restaurant, assuming that because I am a woman, I worry about my weight. This made me feel self-conscious, f...
- November 4, 2011
I hate an Indian giver, don’t you? It’s a gift … keep your gift.
Kris Jenner, Kim Kardashian’s mother on whether the $2 million engagement ring would be returned. via Colorlines....
- November 3, 2011
Maria makes a good point…
Another classmate in a discussion where I was the only Latina. My name is NOT Maria....
- November 2, 2011
You don’t look disabled…
A high school classmate in diversity class said this to me in a discussion about disabilities. I have an emotional disability. It made me feel upset and shocked....
- December 31, 2011
One’s experience of a microaggression isn’t always best communicated through words. Thus, we would like to incorporate visual arts into the Microag...
- December 31, 2011
After saying that women are often groped by strangers in bars and public places, a male coworker tells me not to complain, because it happens to men too. He then remarks, “I actually think it...
- December 31, 2011
I do all the work, she’s here for your entertainment.
A man checking boarding passes at the airport, joking to two men in line in front of me about his female coworker....
- December 31, 2011
I don’t get those people. Why can’t they just wake up and decide they’re a guy or a girl?
A guy I know made an impolite comment about a MAAB individual’s hair, and I said tha...
- December 30, 2011
Well, of course you don’t know very much about cars. You’re a girl.
Guy I had a discussion with on the bus. I’m a trans guy who, not long later, was giving a cis male friend pointe...
- December 30, 2011
You sound like you should have been born a girl.
One man to another man who said he enjoyed getting pedicures. At a diner, both were older (late 50s) white men....
- December 30, 2011
She doesn’t iron his clothes and she doesn’t even COOK for him.
Some of my family members, about a relative’s spouse, whom they called lazy and a bad wife for not taking care of ho...
- December 29, 2011
Where’s your Kalashnikov?
A friend’s boyfriend upon finding out I am of Russian origin....
- December 29, 2011
My professor asks our class if anyone is feminist, I am the only one in the class to raise my hand, and I do so feebly because I’m afraid of how others will judge me. Another student complains a...
- December 29, 2011
When discussing Nietzsche in class, my professor asks if we think his “ubermensch” or superman could be female. One student says that girls can’t because they aren’t strong eno...
- December 28, 2011
I have one of those who helps me pick out clothes.
A student manager at my old job after I came out. All I could think to say was, “I don’t do that,” to which he was surprised. I f...
- December 28, 2011
Why do we need to campaign for abortion rights in this country?
A very left-wing male friend to me, a volunteer for a UK pro-choice campaigning group. People cannot get abortions in Northern Ireland...
- December 28, 2011
In 6th grade, a chapter in our social studies text was entirely devoted to Christianity. I’m white, but born Muslim and raised mostly secular. I didn’t perform well on the quiz for that ch...
- December 27, 2011
You don’t like spicy food?!? What about all your spicy Jamaican/Puerto Rican blood? It’s in your genes!
A white male friend in response to my assertion that I don’t like spicy food...
- December 27, 2011
You’re so pretty, what are you doing here?
The woman assigned to watch me, after I was admitted to the ER due to suicidal tendencies. I felt hopeless, exasperated, and really confused as to wh...
- December 27, 2011
A submission we got:
“Someone at my school posts up the entry from this blog with the implication that the story made a big deal out of something trivial. We had to cancel classes a few weeks ba...
- December 26, 2011
I am South Asian, and I was ranting about how a fellow college student had told me I was pretty, but only because I looked “ethnic”. My friend replies, “At least he thinks you’...
- December 26, 2011
There’s hot girls all around, but he wants a committed relationship. Who wants a committed relationship? What are you, fucking gay?
At the dining hall. I’m a bi woman ally....
- December 26, 2011
Do you speak Chinese?
A mid-30’s white guy as we walk out of a subway station. I’m Asian American (specifically Laotian/Vietnamese/Mongolian), but wasn’t speaking out loud to anyon...
- December 25, 2011
In a blurb by Groupon about a scooter rental deal: “Maneuvering a scooter requires only simple steering skills, passable balance, and the ability to ramp over sleeping hobos.”...
- December 25, 2011
I feel like not being attracted to someone because they are black or white is the same as having a preference with hair color.
A co-worker, middle aged white woman....
- December 25, 2011
Women know nothing about cars.
A mechanic at a car shop after I had already demonstrated that I knew how to change the timing belt on my car. I have been an auto enthusiast since I was 10. I’m...
- December 24, 2011
ugh exams suck :’( #thisisgayerthanaids
Facebook status....
- December 24, 2011
Bisexual people don’t exist. Gay people just say that so they can walk down the hall with a girl holding hands.
Kurt on Glee, a seemingly gay friendly show. Made me feel TIRED....
- December 24, 2011
The same type of gloves is marketed as “sniper gloves” to men but “texting gloves” to women....
- December 23, 2011
Welcome to America! Give me a call.
Said to my friend and me. We are Asian American females born and raised in New York....
- December 23, 2011
In a debate sparked by President Obama’s recommendations to end racial inequality in elite public high schools, a fellow high school graduate from one of NYC’s elite public high schools co...
- December 23, 2011
Women’s studies? What do you do in there, burn your bras and march around school for women’s power?
My brother, mockingly asking me about my women’s studies class after seeing my t...
- December 22, 2011
Don’t sit like that! Boys don’t do that!
My boss, upon seeing me kneeling down, working. I’m a 24-year-old transman, and started transitioning on my job....
- December 22, 2011
How is it fair that some people can get scholarships for just being black? Where is my scholarship for being a hard-working person?
A white male to a group of mostly white people....
- December 22, 2011
My white friend just got this tattoo....
- December 22, 2011
Don’t you think your reaction was offensive to others as well?
My white teacher to a black student when the student was offended that another student described a neighborhood as “ghetto&...
- December 21, 2011
“It’s okay to have a vagina. It’s not okay to be a vagina,” says an close male friend to me after I remarked that a TV show might be too violent for me to continue watching. &#...
- December 21, 2011
Come nappy, leave happy!
Radio commercial for hair salon in Spokane, WA. Made me feel the prevalence of racism, like racism is alive and well....
- December 21, 2011
I told my daughter she’s too pretty to play football.
A recreational league football coach who also happens to be in my teaching program. The focus of our program is social justice! This perso...
- December 21, 2011
The ones breaking the school rules are always black people. The teachers don’t do anything even when they see it happening because they are afraid. I think that I am being discriminated against ...
- December 21, 2011
Girl, you’re not bi. There’s no such thing. You’re just horny and greedy.
My friend’s reaction to me finally coming out. Made me feel judged, hurt, abnormal....
- December 20, 2011
So my friend is an RA here at UC Irvine and he went to Chik Fil-A with his residents. The cashier did NOT ask for their names, but when they got their receipts...
- December 15, 2011
Link: If I Were A Poor Black Kid
Forbes writer Gene Marks, a white man, attempts to put himself in the shoes of lower class black youth. Check out the satirical responses by Scientific American, ...
- December 14, 2011
Well, if you do decide to have sex with men, be sure to use a condom.
The only response I have gotten from gynecologists when I tell them I have sex with women and not men. I have never had a doct...
- December 9, 2011
How long have you been in France? You speak French so well.
Europeans to Frantz Fanon. In the 1952 book Black Skins, White Masks. ...
- December 9, 2011
I’m raising my son so that he’ll be a good husband to his wife and a good father to his children.
Said by a woman in my social welfare class. It made me feel angry and annoyed that she...
- December 8, 2011
You are alienating me because you’re not speaking in English.
Said to me by a U.S. born acquaintance after a friend and I were having a personal conversion in our native language....
- December 8, 2011
Introducing a visualizer for microaggressions | In the last year (a year!), we’ve received a few requests for visual displays of our posts for like-minded conferences, lectures and other educati...
- December 7, 2011
You can replace a lot of people in life, but you only have ONE dad.
Facebook meme....
- December 3, 2011
God, I love it here, there’s so much culture.
A white college student, upon seeing two black men walk down the street, talking and laughing loudly....
- December 2, 2011
I don’t think black people should be allowed to use the word n****
White female....
- December 1, 2011
Stop ganging up on me! It’s so hard to be a male in this household.
My male roommate to our three other female roommates and me in response to me bringing up how he never contributes to house...
- December 1, 2011
I am so sick of apologizing for being white.
A white female classmate during a high school graduation speech given by a black student detailing his past difficulties with discrimination....
- January 31, 2012
Push like a man!
One man to another while trying to load a delivery cart in Manhattan. ...
- January 31, 2012
I feel like such a fatty, no offense.
My friend to me....
- January 31, 2012
I’m at a workplace holiday dinner and we are sharing each others’ quirks and habits. My boss says that people should be careful about what they say around me, no sexist jokes, etc. The onl...
- January 30, 2012
Oh… So I’m just going to put that you aren’t sexually active at this time.
My gynecologist’s reaction to me revealing, when she asked about my sexual activity, that I only ha...
- January 30, 2012
laughingsquid:
Tomorrow’s Lestoil (1968)
...
- January 29, 2012
I’m in a Master of Social Work program at an Ivy League university, and my professors and administrators consistently tell me that I have a different background than my clients. They don’t...
- January 29, 2012
OMFG! It’s like little Mexico beneath my floors! New neighbors moved in below us and all I hear are babies crying and the bass of latino music!
From a Facebook post from a fellow counseling co...
- January 28, 2012
Hey! White girl! I love you! You are beautiful!
Shouted to me on the street 15+ times a day during my study abroad experience in Nicaragua. I never truly understood what it meant to feel objectified...
- January 28, 2012
The learn-to-speak-German tapes I’ve been listening to will ask me to “Say ______ in German” and then will ask me to say the same thing “as if you were a woman” (because ...
- January 28, 2012
I’m fine with gay people as long as they aren’t gay around me.
Boys in my homeroom having a conversation behind me. As an in the closet bisexual teen, it made me feel ashamed; like there...
- January 27, 2012
In Psychology class, we’re using gender as one of our factors. The participants who chose not to answer either “female” or “male” are excluded in many of the analyses. ...
- January 27, 2012
You talk white.
As a young latina, this was expressed to me numerous times after displaying an ‘extensive’ vocabulary or my use of grammatically correct english. It also usually went han...
- January 27, 2012
The gay couple who moved in next door are not as comically flamboyant as the gay people on TV. It’s like they’re not even trying.
...
- January 26, 2012
I’m a half-Dakota, half-Caucasian (a mix of many races) woman who is fairly dark. My friend, who is also half but has very fair skin and eyes said to me one day, “I love being light and Na...
- January 26, 2012
Are you married? Are you single? If you’re single, go out on a date with me. Then I’ll sign. Are you single?
A response from a man in a group I had approached to sign a petition to get P...
- January 26, 2012
Would you like the green card or the pink card? The green card? Are you sure? I thought you would prefer the pink card.
Said by a a male to me while I was signing up to a store’s club....
- January 25, 2012
I had a boss who treated me like his personal secretary, forwarded his phone to my desk, things like that. I have a master’s degree in computer science, more degrees than anybody else working th...
- January 25, 2012
All textures welcome…we can fix that!
Sign outside salon in Richmond, VA. Made me feel angry that that any person’s hair texture can be considered wrong, especially as a WOC who’s...
- January 25, 2012
Male professor taking his leave after an informal meeting with me and a couple of male classmates. He gets up, walks past my chair, shakes hands with my classmates, walks past my chair again and leave...
- January 24, 2012
A girl in my English class described president Obama as ‘Black.’ I mentioned that he had a White mother and therefore this side of his heritage should be acknowledged too as it’s jus...
- January 24, 2012
Oh, I’m just with [me] and her…friend.
My mother on the phone in reference to spending a day with my partner and I with whom I have been in a committed relationship for two years. It mad...
- January 24, 2012
She should be the employeer, and she needs to be a Mexican looking for a cleaning job.
A student in my theater class suggesting a scene idea for a white female and a woman of color....
- January 23, 2012
In gym class, we we arbitrarily split into teams for flag football, but divided so that there were even numbers of girls on each team. Our teacher explained to us that any touchdown in which a girl wa...
- January 23, 2012
Well, there are many meanings of the word [rape] other than what you’re talking about.
Comment made by my MFA program director when I asked her not to use the word ‘rape’ casually ...
- January 23, 2012
Being in a class the first day, when the professor is trying to learn names. He asks the names of everyone who speaks. I speak; he doesn’t ask my name. I notice he also doesn’t ask any of ...
- January 22, 2012
The survey-taker notes “female” for me before asking me for my age. I feel taken aback that she could so blatantly ask me every other line item but presume this answer. However, I don̵...
- January 22, 2012
The fact that asexuals are going to end up alone makes me so sad…. I just don’t understand what would bring them together with someone with out a physical attraction.
Very liberal LGBT f...
- January 21, 2012
I’m working at my low-wage, customer service job when a male coworker from another department walks by. He asks if I’m being paid to stand around and look pretty. I shrug it off. A week la...
- January 21, 2012
I was walking behind a male coworker when he stopped in his tracks and began backing up into me, dancing, while singing “Big Booty Bitches.” I’m a woman. Made me uncomfortable, angr...
- January 21, 2012
One of my coworkers is messing with another coworker by “accusing” her of being gay. She’s furious with him. Meanwhile, I’m sitting there, being gay.
During my shift at a cust...
- January 20, 2012
Can’t wait to show all my friends my ghetto-fabulous ride. She needs a name…something ethnic….Laquisha?
...
- January 20, 2012
Well, you’re almost white.
Said by a white acquaintance to me, a mixed-race (black and white) woman, while out for drinks in Ghana. I was floored. I think she meant Floored. I think she meant...
- January 20, 2012
You don’t sound Chinese to me.
Photographer to me, as I get ready for my senior portrait....
- January 19, 2012
My grandma is in need of a home carer, so my parents put an advert out - this specified that only women need apply since that is what my grandmother requested.
I was informed, with a laugh, that a tra...
- January 19, 2012
Eating a “just-because” dinner with my boyfriend, and the waitress looks at me and asks, “how is everything?” She then turns to my boyfriend and asks, “are you ready fo...
- January 19, 2012
Haha, see? I told you Obama’s not human— he’s a gorilla!
A man I know, referring to a cartoon that portrayed Obama as a gorilla (which he honestly thought was funny). When I told h...
- January 18, 2012
You’re a boy! Boys don’t cry! Do you want people to think you’re a girl.
Said by an adult women to my three-year-old after he had fallen off his bike and cut his lip open. Very sad...
- January 18, 2012
While waiting for a friend at Starbucks, a white man came up to me and yelled“ICHIRO, NUMBER ONE!”
First, I am Chinese, not Japanese, and second, I was born in California and am just as Am...
- January 18, 2012
My male principal tells me to use my “sex appeal” to get boys to sign up for an upcoming school activity. He follows by explaining that I have to use “charm” and my status bein...
- January 17, 2012
THERE’S NO BITCH IN TEAM.
A college-age man’s t-shirt. Of course, maybe it just means team members shouldn’t complain. But as a woman in a mostly-male field, it made me remember t...
- January 17, 2012
Oh, you’re so exotic.
...
- January 17, 2012
I looked like a ‘hoodrat.’
White female referring to her appearance when wearing clothes that were too large for her. ...
- January 16, 2012
I’m having a problem with table 304- wait, do you know them? Oh, just checking. Anyway…
Coworker at a restaurant I worked at for two years. I’m mixed black/latina and the people at...
- January 15, 2012
Don’t get too extreme, okay? We don’t want you all to be prostitutes… Or transgender.
At my high school’s musical practice, when we were creating our characters’ backst...
- January 15, 2012
What if you accidentally slept with a schizophrenic guy and had a nutter baby?
Said by a girl at work. I have a relative with schizophrenia and have struggled with depression in the past. Made me f...
- January 15, 2012
Every time I have an eye exam, I’m sure to get a comment about how small my eyes are. I an an Asian American female. I’m about fucking resigned to it by now....
- January 15, 2012
I mean, I’m all for feminism… but I just worry that if women all join the workforce, birth rates will plummet and the human race will go extinct.
Male, approx 50-year-old coworker to me,...
- January 15, 2012
I go to a McDonalds for lunch break, alone. I sit down at an empty table next to an elderly man, who immediately comments, “What a pretty little thing, I wonder if she’s waiting for her ma...
- January 14, 2012
Every time I see a woman posing and smiling next to the prizes on game shows. The hosts are always male. Makes me feel as though women are still sadly only seen as decorative props, or as potential ...
- January 14, 2012
I’m sure you can speak to this.
Teacher, referring to me in a class discussing how race influences therapy. I’m the only Black person in the room....
- January 14, 2012
I mispronounce a lot of words because my parents moved to America 30 years ago but still speak with an accent, so I picked it up from them. My friends always make fun of me and say I’m a bad Ame...
- January 14, 2012
A bouncer/security guard at my favourite bar keeps touching my arm and back as he checks my ID.
He’s a big man, and I’m a petite 24 year old female rape victim. It’s not ‘signi...
- January 14, 2012
My father likes to tell me that men can only be “masculine” if they are heterosexual and buff, because “masculinity is a biological need to procreate with the opposite gender.”...
- January 14, 2012
I work at a ticket counter. More than once I have been asked, in the middle of a transaction, “Where are you from?” I know that they mean “What is your ethnic background,” but ...
- January 13, 2012
My first words to her were what any father would say to their own daughter: What were you thinking walking alone like that!
The director of Campus Security in a lecture to first-years. The girl she ...
- January 13, 2012
Jif peanut butter has the slogan “Choosy moms choose Jif” and Kix cereal has the slogan “Kid-tested, mother-approved.” Apparently it’s always Mom’s job to buy food ...
- January 13, 2012
I am a sixteen year old high school student living in the state of New York, where we are required to take Regents tests come every year’s end. I’m always uncomfortable when filling out th...
- January 12, 2012
A Facebook friend posted a picture of a PSA billboard encouraging parents to teach young boys to be respectful of women and the friend added her observation, as a teacher, that young men will meet s...
- January 12, 2012
Click through for more in-depth analysis....
- January 12, 2012
On Facebook, my ex posts about being “your average hardworking young professional with a mental disorder.” A friend of hers jokingly replies, “Better than a lazy, not working per...
- January 11, 2012
I was walking home from a friendly gathering with friends. It was pretty late at night and was stopped by a man who asked, “Are you still working tonight, mama? I have some money for you.̶...
- January 11, 2012
Donate
Dear readers,
We’re days away from unveiling a new site - with additional content, resources and ways to interact with the project. However, this means that our costs for hosting and cont...
- January 11, 2012
Awkward Privilege, by Michael Cuauhtémoc Martínez...
- January 11, 2012
I wish I could bring my dog out to eat with me!
Teenage girl and mother to me at a Chinese restaurant; I’m a 23 year old male with a service dog....
- January 10, 2012
You’ve gained weight!
My cousin’s first words to my mother during my grandmother’s funeral. Made me just angry, very very angry....
- January 10, 2012
Host/attend a meetup for Rebuild the Dream
MLK Day weekend is coming up! Please consider commemorating the weekend by hosting or attending a meetup for Rebuild the Dream, in conjunction with the Amer...
- January 10, 2012
Awkward Privilege, by Michael Cuauhtémoc Martínez...
- January 9, 2012
At the company I’m working at this summer, I’m the only intern programmer who is female. Whenever I meet someone new who realizes I’m a programmer, they usually end up commenting a...
- January 9, 2012
There’s this certain group of my friends/acquaintances who continue to use “gay” as an insult in front of me. I’ve asked them not to do this, at least not while I’m aroun...
- January 9, 2012
I have an older sister, who likes to work out at the gym everyday. On the other side, I usually go no more than twice a week. However, my parents insist on me doing tasks such as carrying heavy bags o...
- January 8, 2012
“You have to stroke his ego a bit,” says my father in our living room when I tell him I’m asking my boss for a raise. “He is a man. And you are a woman. Unfortunately.”
I...
- January 8, 2012
Lesbians shouldn’t be allowed to use sex toys, they made their choice.
...
- January 8, 2012
You’re a woman, you can’t carry that. Get your brother to do the men’s work.
My grandfather to me any time he visits. When I express my frustration to my mother, she responds that ...
- January 7, 2012
“Shit White Girls Say to Black Girls” - This video blew up on Youtube, and incidentally is entirely a parody of microaggressive behavior. Enjoy! ...
- January 7, 2012
I am walking around JCPenney when I see they have a dedicated section of t-shirts with game motifs on it for a decent price. I rush over to grab some, but they are all too big for me. Why? Because the...
- January 7, 2012
There is a difference between not believing in gender roles, and encouraging your kid to be a homosexual.
A straight cismale friend’s status quoting his straight cisgirlfriend on Facebook. Mad...
- January 6, 2012
I want to go grab a snack at the corner store, but last night when I went a man approached me and did the “why aren’t you smiling/smile for me” routine and now I’m afraid that ...
- January 6, 2012
A friend coaches sports for kids. She says the best advice she got was that “girls have to feel good to play good, but boys have to play good to feel good. To motivate girls, make them happy. To...
- January 6, 2012
My band and I go backstage before the show, to set up and sound check. The bouncer asks me to leave, saying “girlfriends aren’t allowed backstage.” When I tell him I’m a musici...
- January 5, 2012
Are you ladies familiar with science fiction at all?
A man approaching me and my cousin. We were attending a science fiction convention, sitting in a members only area of the con, wearing our con me...
- January 5, 2012
You can pitch a tent.
My dad said this when I asked him what he’d do if I said I was gay. He tried to pass it off as joking, but with this underlying tone of being serious. Made me sad because...
- January 4, 2012
What’s up with all these girls dressing like streetwalkers lately? If women don’t want to be known as sex objects they shouldn’t dress like one.
One of my facebook friends on thei...
- January 4, 2012
Welcome to WordPress. This is your first post. Edit or delete it, then start blogging!...
- January 3, 2012
I have seen two different psychiatrists for problems with depression, anxiety, self-harm, and suicidal thoughts. When they found out I was attracted to women, both immediately attributed my problems t...
- January 3, 2012
If she wears those shorts out there, it’s her own fault if she get’s into ‘trouble.’
My grandmother referring to my shorts on a cruise in Turkey. Apparently if I wear short s...
- January 2, 2012
I overhear two women oohing and aahing over pictures of a new boyfriend on her phone. “Is he Asian or something?” she asks. “He’s Latino and Jewish!” she beams, as if a m...
- January 2, 2012
I hear these Spanish and Oriental kids speaking and I think they must speak English because they go to school and have to communicate with their teachers.
At work in a call center....
- January 2, 2012
Women are naturally attractive. Why do you think when you open a magazine for something like cars or video games, there’s girls everywhere, but when you open a magazine for women, there’s ...
- January 1, 2012
You’d be soo pretty if you lost weight.
I’m female, age 7....
- January 1, 2012
I heard this woman on TV say she didn’t feel like a woman because of her weight. I just don’t want you to feel that way.
I’m female, age 7....
- January 1, 2012
I’ll give you $5 a pound for every pound you lose.
I’m female, age 7....
- February 11, 2012
The disciplinary principal at my arts high school calls an assembly that was supposed to be about not wearing hats inside the school buildings, but which spirals off into him lecturing us “young...
- February 11, 2012
I’m participating in a self-defense class this semester. The day before class started, the instructor sends out an email with information on the class. A paragraph explained that the class was n...
- February 10, 2012
I’m participating in a self-defense class this semester. The day before class started, the instructor sends out an email with information on the class. A paragraph explained that the class was n...
- February 10, 2012
I convinced my boyfriend of a year to go to a school basketball game with me (he detests sports, but a friend of ours was playing). I bought our tickets from our vice principal at the door, handing he...
- February 9, 2012
But then who would be first lady? lol
About having a gay president....
- February 9, 2012
Are you sure you are alright with driving a stick shift?
I received this question at different car dealerships when purchasing my last three cars. Asked around to my male friends who drive stick s...
- February 9, 2012
A girl who lived in Africa joined our class in school. She’s white. I’m black. Our teacher says to me, “Welcome!” I say, “I’m from Michigan.”...
- February 8, 2012
Are you lesbian because a man hurt you?
I was facing homelessness after my parents found out I’m lesbian. My only nearby support system was the school I attended. After I explained the situati...
- February 8, 2012
When I try to explain to people that I am, indeed, a native Hawaiian, people usually either laugh or ask “What are you? Albino?” Yes. Yes I am....
- February 8, 2012
In my Mandarin Chinese class at University, my teacher, who is from China, wrote the character for ‘banana’ on the board. Then she pointed to my friend Tania, who is ethnically Chinese but...
- February 7, 2012
I ask a colleague to perform a simple task that is required of him. He responds with “it must be that time of the month, scary.” I ask him what female hormone levels have to do with his ...
- February 7, 2012
Oh it’s so soft, it’s like a loofah!
Classmate in college, patting a random dude with an afro in lecture. A memory kicked off by the ‘Shit white girls say to black girls’ vid...
- February 6, 2012
Today, I ordered some food and was asked how spicy I’d like it. I replied that I’d like it to be very spicy, and immediately, the man taking my order winked suggestively and asked me if I ...
- February 6, 2012
While I welcome a majority of the new laws to be implemented this year, I don’t quite understand the required teaching of Gay/Lesbian contributions. Starting 2012 students in California must ...
- February 6, 2012
esprit-follet:
Microassaults: Conscious and intentional actions or slurs, such as using racial epithets, displaying swastikas or deliberately serving a white person before a person of color in a res...
- February 6, 2012
Granted, you won’t have a normal family.
Sister talking about how having a “gay family” isn’t normal. As if something was wrong about me. Does she even realize how much th...
- February 5, 2012
A girl comes up to the sink next to mine in a public bathroom and asks, “Where are you from?” I say, “Albion.” She says, “Is that in China?” I go, “No.. thats...
- February 5, 2012
But what would you think if someone came in with purple hair?
A consultant when I was seeking advice on how I should go about discussing the harassment and discrimination I have dealt with concernin...
- February 5, 2012
Your brother is such a girl!
My mother while we did Christmas shopping together, because my little brother has traditionally feminine interests. Made me feel frustrated, upset....
- February 4, 2012
Sorry , that must be my Black coming out.
My biracial friend (African American and Mexican). Whenever she does or says something negative she blames it on the “Black” side of her. Make...
- February 3, 2012
If you don’t like it here then why don’t you just move somewhere else?
My White classmate suggested I leave the US because of all the social problems. I’m Native American. ...
- February 3, 2012
Wow, you’re really good at this!
Male co-worker, in a tone of great surprise, at seeing me use a screwdriver to open my PC because the hard drive had failed. I’m female, 24, and I have ...
- February 3, 2012
We can’t have equal representation, the whole political system would collapse. Besides men from well educated backgrounds (public school boys like us) are the best trained to lead the country, s...
- February 2, 2012
No, it’s a man’s job.
This was said in response to me, an able-bodied woman, when I offered to help carry a stack of books. Quite bewildering as I was quite a lot bigger, stronger and yo...
- February 2, 2012
You can’t be black. You listen to Rock Music.
...
- February 2, 2012
This is a rotating set… It can be pushed easily by one strong guy, or three or four wimpy girls.
My theater professor at my small liberal arts college. ...
- February 1, 2012
I just don’t understand it. I think you must just be doing it for attention. When this phase is over and you go back to putting effort into your appearance, you can be treated with respect.
My...
- February 1, 2012
I’m in an Adolescent Development class, and I’m reviewing the slides and one slide about socio-economic status and achievement stated: Reasons for worse school performance of poor youth? T...
- February 1, 2012
Don’t worry about Mr. ________. He’s just extremely Jewish.
This was said to me by an employee on my first day at a location as the assistant manager. It was after I attempted to deal...
- March 31, 2012
"Well, so what that I forgot it? It's not something that a man thinks about. That's not the kind of thing a man is worried about." My partner said this to me when he forgot to bring home a pregnancy t...
- March 31, 2012
"When are you going to have some kids? You know you're not getting any younger." This is what a co-worker said to me after learning that someone we both know is expecting a child. What if I can't ha...
- March 23, 2012
"You used to have such a dyke haircut," someone says to me all the time. 1. Why the implication that "dyke haircuts" - and therefore lesbians - are unfeminine and unattractive? 2. Why does this person...
- March 23, 2012
Our principal tells us via intercom system some basic announcements. Proceeds with a few innocent reminders about school policy on dress code. Then - "And ladies, please make sure you're not showing t...
- March 23, 2012
At my (all female) high school, we were not allowed to go to school dances unless we had a male partner from an approved school. We could not go alone, we could not take a female friend, and no one da...
- March 23, 2012
When helping my brother unload a truck recently, the men always insisted on carrying the larger items (which I was capable of carrying myself, mind you) and handed me smaller items. Carrying the large...
- March 23, 2012
Often when I have dinner at people's houses, they ask me if I would prefer chopsticks, regardless of the meal!...
- March 20, 2012
I am a registered nurse and always get told that I speak English so well. I was born in Australia and I am of Filipino background. I don't think about my appearance until a patient or their family mem...
- March 20, 2012
" Yes, I understand you're Asian Australian, but where are you really from?"...
- March 17, 2012
I always get asked to be an interpreter for patients who are not native English speakers, specifically for those of Asian background. Because I am of Asian background as well, there is this assumption...
- May 2, 2012
My male dog is wearing a ribbon tied in a bow around his neck. When my grandfather sees him he exclaims loudly, "Jake! You're a poofter! It's not enough that you've had your balls cut off. Now you'r...
- May 2, 2012
Me: Hey, should I go to a steakhouse or to a sushi place for dinner with my family?
Friend: I think you should go to the steakhouse because you guys know how to make sushi, right?...
- May 2, 2012
Professor: Where did you go to school to write like this?
Me: In New Jersey.
Professor: No, was it a private school?
Me: No, is something wrong?
Professor: Well you say "ask" versus "ax" a...
- May 2, 2012
I noticed that when I eat out and order a Coke, I'm often asked whether I want it to be a diet Coke. I asked some male friends about this and they told me it never happens to them....
- January 31, 2013
"You won't achieve equality by not knowing how to take a joke."...
- January 21, 2013
In honor of MLK, ESPN is running a basketball marathon on MLK Day. While I enjoy the sport especially on an afternoon off from work, I can't help but wonder if this is just an extension of a black ste...
- January 20, 2013
H&R Block employee when my best friend (who's black) and I went to get our taxes done together: "Employed?"
Me: "Yes."
H&R: "Any children?"
Me: "No."
H&R, turns to my friend: "Okay, and you. Emplo...
- January 16, 2013
I worked in a pet store and a mother and her young daughter come in one day. The little girl is very young, probably less than five years old, but extremely inquisitive and interested in all the repti...
- January 15, 2013
24, female-bodied, in a relationship - so Facebook shows me ads with babies, wedding dresses, and engagement rings. Change gender on Facebook to male - suddenly I get ads pertaining to things I actual...
- January 15, 2013
While on my bicycle waiting for the light to turn green, a couple of guys on the corner were hissing at me asking for my number. I ignored them. Then one of them said "she's acting like she's white." ...
- January 14, 2013
My coworker said that the reason our local high school didn't have Martin Luther King Day off was because "There aren't that many black people there to complain about it."...
- January 12, 2013
"My friend said I was totally black because I drink kool aid and eat watermelon all the time!"...
- January 12, 2013
I work for an anti-violence organization. I am a lesbian womyn of color and do a number of trainings on lgbtq issues and violence for the organization. At our last volunteer training, a training done ...
- January 12, 2013
A coworker comes up to me to say "How about a smile?" I give him the stinkeye and say "So it's not enough that I put on make-up? I have to smile, too?" My shoulders tense up as I walk away. I was on g...
- January 10, 2013
"I wish GPS had an "avoid ghetto" setting!"
My friends facebook status, in denver trying to find her way around the city. She's a fellow lesbian who is in many of my sociology courses. Makes me fee...
- January 10, 2013
During a discussion on music history in college:
"Like, what was Africa like at the time Mozart was alive?"
"Like, drum circles."
"How much of Africa was even like civilized at that time?"...
- January 10, 2013
I am routinely touched when a man needs me out of his way--sometimes with an "Excuse me," other times without. When I was twelve, I was sexually harassed and touched inappropriately by a male classmat...
- January 10, 2013
"We should get them to approve the photo before we use it....it's pretty Asian-y."
At my job at a fairly big magazine. These conversations happen all the time and make me feel awkward and unable to...
- January 5, 2013
I was at the bar with several new co-workers when I was approached by a white guy who told me I was beautiful and asked what my nationality was. I told him I was African-American and he asked, "But wh...
- January 1, 2013
"Racism is only a problem now because minorities continue to think they're oppressed."
Comment made during a conversation about contemporary racism....
- January 1, 2013
Being called "hearing impared," instead of deaf or hard of hearing.
The term "hearing impaired" seems silly to be upset over, but when used over and over to describe you, you begin to believe that ...
- January 1, 2013
I'm a student teacher at a high school in a relatively liberal Midwestern town. We had a substitute teacher for a few days in a row and as she was leaving, asked me if I had a "special someone" in m...
- January 1, 2013
"There's African Americans and then there's black people. There's a difference. Like, Oprah is an African American, but some random black guy off the street doesn't deserve the title, you know?"
My...
- January 1, 2013
"You look like you're going to...blow...something...up."
Someone says to me as I'm wearing a scarf tied broadly around my head, covering my nose and mouth....
- January 1, 2013
In my statistics class my professor said you can like males or females. Not both (in talking about mutually exclusive events)....
- January 1, 2013
"You all sound educated"
An older white man to me and my three black friends. My three black female friends and I (also a black female) were at a 5-star resort in Miami, and an older white man appr...
- January 1, 2013
"Hey baby, how much for you and your sister!"
Shouted at me (bisexual low femme) and a genderqueer friend by men in a car just down the street from my house Angry, unsafe, ready to fight...
- January 1, 2013
"But you should just be happy you're being represented!"
Any time I or my friends complains about our genders/sexualities/races/religions being represented negatively or as a stereotype in the medi...
- January 1, 2013
At my school, the Introduction to Native Americans class, which covers the history of Native Americans from pre-Contact to present day, does not count towards the United States History general educati...
- January 1, 2013
I was working and I engaged in a conversation with an older white male while he was waiting for his wife to finish shopping. Mid-conversation he looks at me and says "What are you?" I didn't really un...
- January 1, 2013
Entered an informal backgammon tournament (8 players, all men but me) and won my first round. Was told by another player that I was "good...for a woman." My vanquished opponent called him out on that ...
- January 1, 2013
"I'm probably such a racist, but a black man dressed as Santa is just wrong"...
- January 1, 2013
I walk out of my office and approach a waiting cab, make eye contact with the cab driver, reach out my arm to open the door... and a white woman rushes past me, gets in the cab, closes the door and st...
- January 1, 2013
"You can stop by the next time your husband takes you to New York."...
- January 1, 2013
"Lesbian sex isn't real sex, it's just mutual masturbation. You can't have sex without a penis." Said an ex friend of mine while I happily exclaimed losing my virginity to the woman I love....
- January 1, 2013
"I'm sure that even if they're innocent of that specific crime, they did something else in the past that we don't know about, so they still deserve it."...
- February 19, 2013
Our fantastic mentor, role model, friend Kevin Nadal’s book “That’s So Gay: Microaggressions and the Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual, and Transgender Community” has just been published! There are a...
- February 1, 2013
"You have access to birth control pills now. That doesn't give you an excuse to sleep around."
My male gynecologist. I was seventeen at the time and began taking the pill to regulate my period. I w...
- February 1, 2013
"Stop crying and acting like a little girl!"
My sister to her 4 year old son, who has a twin sister....
- February 1, 2013
"I don't date bisexuals. They're never faithful."
Said to me by woman who identifies as lesbian....
- February 1, 2013
My MCAT instructor keeps referring to the writer of our passages with male pronouns when they do not list an author by name. Made me feel stupid/unvalued... like if our instructor doesn't think women ...
- February 1, 2013
After seeing I had purchased a copy Betty Friedan's The Feminine Mystique, my father became annoyed and angry. Incredulous, he said "Great, really, feminism? Just don't start getting pissed every time...
- February 1, 2013
"Yeah, I just don't know what's up with them, they're all crazy. All these women are just getting married or engaged, most of the girls in my office too... What's up with that? I mean, they're, like, ...
- February 1, 2013
"I just love working here, there's so much culture. This is one of the most diverse high schools in the district!"
One of my white colleagues at a public high school. This particular school is abou...
- February 1, 2013
"Well yay for not being a black female."
One of my closest friends (who is a white male) after I tried to explain how difficult it can sometimes be to care for my hair." Made me feel mocked that he...
- February 1, 2013
One day my boss comes up to me and out of the blue says
My boss: ""[last name] , hey [last name] is that your husband's name?
Me: No I didn't take my husband's last name.
Boss: ...
Me: I'm a fem...
- February 1, 2013
Often when I bring up that I have Asperger syndrome, people respond by saying something like, "But you seem normal!" This reinforces the feeling that I have to continue to censor certain parts of my...
- February 1, 2013
"It was Eve who ate the apple first. Would you really put Eve in charge of the whole country?"
My mother when discussing female political candidates....
- February 1, 2013
"Your gay? I have the perfect person for you!"
The ""perfect person"" is gay too...so it must work out perfect right? NOT!...
- February 1, 2013
Watching a football game with my father and brother. During halftime, they present winners of a skills competition for kids 8 through 15. Upon seeing the girls and their trophies, my father, amused,...
- February 1, 2013
"We all know that Filipinos aren't really real Asians. I mean look, they have Spanish last names, and they are pretty dark, and they don't look that Asian! Can't we call them something else? It'd make...
- February 1, 2013
"You're so young and pretty. You don't need all these medications."
My pharmacist, every time I pick up the prescriptions that keep me out of the ER. I'm a young disabled woman....
- February 1, 2013
"You can do [x]. It's not that hard."
I have an invisible physical disability. I hear this from teachers, friends, and parents when I try to tell them about my ability level...
- February 1, 2013
"You're too black to play Katara."
That still pisses me off. I mean really. That happened in Junior year, but that just stuck with me. It’s probably always going to stick with me. That feeling. Tha...
- February 1, 2013
I wanted to get my nephew a My Little Pony coloring book since I like MLP and I wanted to share that with him (and we share pink as one of our favorite colors). My brother, however, said that my siste...
- February 1, 2013
"Oh you actually are pretty! We should go somewhere!"
- My mother to me after my friend plastered my face with make up, slapped a straight waist length wig on my head, and put me in a mini-dress ...
- February 1, 2013
Whenever I tell people that I am a lesbian, they assume that someone (a man) hurt me in my past....
- April 24, 2013
My close friend is Armenian, and her father has friends in the Armenian community in Watertown, much of which is located on Franklin. In these last 24 or so hours, one of his friends have received cal...
- April 23, 2013
I logged into Facebook and saw the memes sprawling all over my feed equating the Boston bombings to terrorists, Muslims, and immigrants. I messaged them and engaged in dialogue validating their frustr...
- April 23, 2013
"How much money would you put on the Boston bombers being Muslim?"...
- April 23, 2013
I'm from Ocala, FL and living in Boston. I just called my local newspaper in Florida to ask how they were being sensitive to anti-Islamic sentiment in their reporting of the Boston Incident... they ac...
- April 23, 2013
Upon having seen coverage of the Boston Marathon bombing, my mother, who is white, states, "Middle Easterns... always killing everybody." I'm Middle Eastern, early 20s, and her son. My little sisters,...
- April 20, 2013
On Friday evening, after the second suspect in the Boston marathon bombings had been caught, President Obama took to a podium, and said the following:
That American spirit includes staying true to ...
- April 20, 2013
Today at work, a guest was looking at the Boston Marathon newsfeed we had playing and said, "We should bomb them all! Kill them all! It's all they understand!" I asked who, exactly, he intended to sla...
- April 20, 2013
Sitting in a library at school, I hear an African American student laughing a little loudly... followed by a white student saying, "Yo Shaq, shut up!"...
- April 1, 2013
This morning, the Today show did a segment on foods from around the world. They highlighted one specific food item from each place.
Some of the places named: India, Scotland, and Africa.
I hope ...
