power, privilege, and everyday life.
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1610 posts tagged race
“Can you move these chairs so I can sit down with my friend and eat?”
White woman to me, a black man. I was waiting in line to be seated at a restaurant in Washington DC.
I, an Asian girl, was waiting with my mother on line in a New York County Court with a Hispanic family in front of us. A white male that was working there walked past us, completely ignored us and greeted another white male that was on line behind us with “How can I help you, sir?” Keep in mind we were all fluent in English.
We are learning American history in college. We are focused on slavery and the Civil War during the lead up to the 2014 referendum. After the results a white, yes (Brexit) -voting classmate cries that “I was trying to free us from slavery like blacks were in slavery.” This was after we studied several slave narratives which clearly illustrated the horrors that black people had to endure. Several other classmates nag the teacher about “why we don’t sussed like the South did.”
“Let the GIRL go pass.”
Said to me (an African American woman over the age of 30) by a young white male (under the age of 30) on the light rail; (on my way home from an Orioles game) when I refused to go under his arm to exit the train and I brought to his attention that he was impeding my passage, after saying “excuse me” numerous times and his refusal to move out of the way.
“May I help you?”
A white man at Target when I approached my mom (a white woman), as if I (a black girl) was trying to take something from her. I felt like people don’t know about interracial adoption
“You talk like a white girl.”
I have been told this many times because I use ‘big’ words when I am talking casually. I am a Black girl.
Today at work, there was a Latino father and his children. Like children, they were playing and running around the store. My white boss comes up to me and says “Hispanic people have absolutely no control over their kids.”
“Look, it’s a dog walker. You have such a cool job!”
A white woman in the lobby of my condo. To which I replied: “These are MY dogs and I live here.” Her [totally oblivious] “Oh! He does too!” I shook my head and got into the elevator. It felt as if she were implying that a Afro-American person–much less a woman–could afford to live in this building.
My husband and I are both African American and have been together for over two years now. I have always known that he had previously dated a lot of women of other ethnicities. However, I was extremely shocked when he told me that he had always avoided black women in particular because they can be “loud and aggressive” and that he was happy that I wasn’t like that all the time. He refused my rebuttal that there are women like that in all cultures. While I don’t question his love for me, it is a constant worry that maybe he will find another woman who has all the same favorable qualities that I have but with fair skin, straight hair and light eyes. It drives me crazy that my appearance, his own appearance, is not the one he finds attractive.
I live in a European country. I am mixed black and white. I was overjoyed when I made another similarly mixed acquaintance. Until I realized she calls all Asians “Chinese” and states “they’re all the same to me.” I tried to reason with her several times but she just doesn’t want to get why her comments are racist and unacceptable. She even called my Nepalese/German sister-in-law “Chinese” straight into her face, who was really offended (not because it’s bad being Chinese, but due to this stereotyping). I am so shocked she doesn’t know better and only realizes racism when it refers to herself.
Office setting. Insurance claims. First day on job. Three co-workers quote Shakespeare throughout the day. Ask me if I studied Shakespeare in college and I replied “no.” They roll their eyes and someone comments: You have a normal name, Barbara. I am African American. I felt patronized.
The honor roll certificates are being given out in alphabetical order at my school. During a streak of Patels, one kid shouts “We all know they’ll all get As anyway! Who cares?"
I’m an Asian woman. Whenever there is another Asian woman in my workplace, I inevitably get called by her name, multiple times a day. One day, my write colleague told me “You should realize how hard this is for me and stop caring so much!” after calling me the other Asian girl’s name. Saying “I’m trying!” or “you know it’s not racist” doesn’t help when you’re not trying and it IS racist.
I am trying to get my fingerprints done at the first precinct in Virginia Beach so that I can complete a practicum experience with the court system in the fall. On my form I left my race blank because I equally identify as Latina and Asian. Before I even get to explain to the clerk why the space, which would allow for one letter, was blank, she chastises me for leaving it blank. I explain that I am biracial and that I don’t know what to put down because I don’t see a list of options for me to pick from. She rudely asks me “Well what are you? What are you?!” repeatedly. I calmly explain that I am equal parts Latina and Asian again, and she hastily replies “We’re just going to put Asian.” without my consent and without even attempting to see if there is a way for me to accurately document my identity.
It’s a few years ago, but I am waiting on the NYC subway when this young white man gets off the train wearing a T-shirt that says, “If we had known it was going to be this much trouble, we would have picked the cotton ourselves.” As a young black woman, you can imagine my total offense to his shirt and the message he sent to anybody and everybody who could read.